Marriage

Save My Marriage

2010-04-17T21:55:00.000-07:00

Save My Marriage Today - How To Save A Failing Marriage by Anne Davids
in Relationships / Marriage (submitted 2010-04-14)

If you want to know how to save a failing marriage, then the first thing that you should do is to look into yourself and to commit to the reformation process. Start the rebuilding process with assessing how much you are, or have been, contributing to the relationship.

Click Here For Save My Marriage Today Instant Access Now!

You have to admit that there are issues, instead of pretending that everything is going fine. Learn how to express what you are concerned about and tell your spouse that these issues have to be dealt with now. Good communication is essential. If you and your spouse are not able to communicate effectively your marriage is almost sure to be problem filled.

Ask important questions, and give your spouse the chance to answer them. Ask your spouse what they see in you that need to be improved, or what habits you have that may be causing arguments in your relationship. You must be open to listen and really hear what your spouse is saying. Do not argue with your spouse about their point of view, but rather listen and take it all in. Be willing to adjust your behavior to help the relationship. Remember, never get on the defensive with your spouse and you will find that communication will improve.

Learn the art of compromise. Instead of always trying to get your way, you should seek a middle ground that will let you resolve your problems in a way that you both feel good about. Also, be willing to get outside assistance. A lot of spouses will avoid getting outside help at all costs. What they don't understand is the value of getting outside help.

Lastly, do not give up easily. It will be difficult, especially where two strong personalities are concerned. But then again, the answer to the question "how to save a failing marriage" is right there in your hands.

Click Here For Save My Marriage Today Instant Access Now!

About the Author
This author writes about Secrets Of Happy Marriage and Save My Marriage Today.

Asian Marriage

2010-04-01T07:39:00.000-07:00

Asian girls & Asian women - Why are they popular? by Jenny Willston
in Relationships / Dating (submitted 2010-03-27)

Asian girls and women are enjoying a lot of popularity in this day and age. They are increasingly overcoming their reticence and enjoying an independent life. People are charmed by the looks and culture of Asian ladies. This has led to the popularity of Asian girls and women in the context of dating services.

There are people who wish to sustain a long-term relationship with Asian women as they feel that these ladies are capable of continuing a serious relationship. These women are perceived as truthful and reliable. The reason for this perception could be the fact that Asian women are part of a strong family structure that is seldom to be seen among other overseas men. Men are also lured by the fact that Asian women possess good culinary skills. These girls are different and this is perhaps the fact that makes them even more attractive to men.

Asian women and girls can effortlessly manage both the household chores and their work front. Asian women are intelligent and well-educated and this is also an alluring fact for men. Both Asian men and women can claim to be more or less equal in the sphere of education.

What makes Asian girls and women popular is the fact that they are strongly rooted to their traditional values. Asian women normally do not pursue another relationship after they are married. Moreover, as Asian ladies are mostly brought up in a joint family, they learn to respect their elders as well. This is an integral part of an Asian culture that makes her so attractive to men.

Asian women are quite attractive and this is perhaps a determining fact in their marriage. Men are quite naturally attracted to good-looking women and it is inevitable that men would be attracted to Asian ladies on account of their natural and vibrant beauty.

Meeting an Asian lady is quite easy as you have the option to meet her via the dating services that are enabled on the Internet. You can search for an Asian woman in the comfort and privacy of your home.

When you meet an Asian woman, remember that she is special. It is imperative that she should be treated with respect and with a lot of care and affection. Asian women generally do not look their age and thus, appear younger than they actually are. There are cultural dissimilarities that are imperative if you want to date an Asian girl. Dating and ultimately marrying an Asian lady might be a complex process but once you have managed to meet your match, you are bound to her for life.

When you are planning to date an Asian woman, remember that she is different. Cultural dissimilarities are bound to crop up but then an Asian girl is quite adjusting as well. If you wish to date an Asian girl, you must respect her culture and treat her with love and affection. In order to find an ideal Asian girl, you can check out the free of cost online dating sites where there are provisions for meeting Asian girls.

About the Author
For more information Meeting thousands Asian girls online at free Asian dating service Many single Asian women waiting for you Why Pakistani women and girls look for husbands online Please visit our dating service to find out more about You can meet an Pakistani bride at this free dating service

The Undersea Marriage at Trang, Thailand

2010-03-04T16:26:00.000-08:00

Why Thai Girls for Marriage Too Popular Today by Jenny Willston
in Relationships (submitted 2010-02-11)

Thai girls for dating and marriage are too popular today. They are considered the best women to get married with. They are also considered the best wives to live with. If you want to find a Thai single woman, then you should go to the Asian dating sites to find her. There are thousands of Asian women seeking men on the Internet. There is no charge for services when you join completely Thailand dating sites. There are no hidden fees. You have complete control over your personal ad. First you have to do is register a profile. You tell these single ladies that you are the man looking for a woman. You describe yourself by writing about your personal information such as age, interests, likes, dislikes, career, marital status, etc. You can add pictures to your profile to be attractive. You should think about it this way. You create a profile for the ladies to look at. So, when you view other Thai personal ads, would you want to see ads with photos?

Generally speaking, you can find thousands of Thai girls for marriage at totally free dating sites in Thailand. You will pay no fee for using these services. After your personal ad has been approved, you can search for ladies and contact them. You should contact some of the girls instead of one to increase your chance. There are thousands of Thai women seeking men on the Internet, you can choose the best to date or marry. Dating process is very simple and easy because all your work can be done at your home computer. You don't travel to clubs looking for a date. You just sit at home and browse Thai girl for dating online waiting to meet you. What are you waiting for? Take action today.

Thai girls for marriage are too popular in today's world because of their exotic and oriental beauty. Have you ever been in Bangkok? If you walk in the evenings in Bangkok, then you will be interested in this romantic city. There are thousands of beautiful and pretty Thai girls who walk the streets with their summer clothes. As you know, it is always warm in Thailand. The main reason that Thailand girls for marriage are very popular in Western countries, including USA, Canada, Italy, Australia, Great Britain, and Germany is their oriental beauty and characteristics. Thai girls are one of the best Asian girls for dating and marriage in today's world.

Thailand girls are patient, caring, and supportive. A Thai girl always stays on your side, no matter what you do. There is no conflict between husband and wife. Thai women let their men lead the family. They consider marriage as a life-time commitment, so they take it seriously. In Thailand, women are very good in the house work including cleaning, cooking and etc. So, if you marry a Thai woman, you have a clean house and delicious meals every day. Women in Thailand place their husbands and children at the top. Thai girl usually works hard to make sure that her husband and children are happy. She rarely goes out with her friends without her family. In fact, she is sacrificed for her family if she needs to.

About the Author
For more information Visit free Thai dating service to meet Thai women and Thai girls waiting online to meet their soulmate Seeking Thai girls for dating and marriage today Read dating tips and advice in terms of relationship and marriage for free at the free online Thailand dating service Please visit us today

Russian Girls and Marriage

2010-02-28T18:39:00.000-08:00

Russian brides and marraige by englishrussian
in Relationships / Dating (submitted 2009-10-01)

It is a fact that Russian women, who decide to join Russian dating sites, are doing it for one reason: they want to get married.

If they are over thirty years old and have children, the likelihood of them getting married in Russia to a Russian man is nearly nil, there are over 12million more women in Russia than men so men have a big choice, to many a women with children can be a burden.

Some Russian women decide to marry a foreign man, not as a first choice, but because they realize that their chances of getting married are slipping away.

Only a very small percentage of single women in Russia seek a foreign husband, the Russian economy has changed a lot in past years many Russian women are happy with their lives in Russia and have no wish or desire to move or leave their native country.

Most Russian women who come to the West well-educated professional people. They most likely have a secure job with a good career in Russia. And probably would even have to take a salary cut to come to the West. They have a lot to lose. They are giving up their job, their family and friends, their culture, their language everything they know for the chance to get married and have a happy home life. It's a big decision to move to an unknown country. The only person they know is their future husband, who they may not know that well.

Russians brides are raised to be dependent on those around them. Their future husband is their only source of security and protection it is common in the Russian culture for a women to rely on her man.

The biggest fear for a Russian women to marry a foreigner is that he may leave her and she will be left with the only option to return to Russia and pick up her old life. She will have to go home to her family and friends in defeat. She will have to try to find another job. The last thing they want to have happen is to be alone in a new country, struggling to start a new life from scratch, without benefit of family or friends.

Most Russian women are not able to look after themselves in a foreign country, and a Russian woman is not going to marry you just to get to your country then get a divorce from you after she gets her citizenship. This is just a myth.

Many Russian women prefer to marry older men in foreign countries because they believe older men are more emotionally and financially secure, and are less likely to leave them for a younger woman in the future this attitude is also common in their own country and you will see many young Russian men married to older men.

Your Russian bride is not going to marry you just so she can live in your country and have a higher standard of living and as soon as she gets her green card divorce you, this is also a myth. She wants to love and be loved and to have a rewarding sex life Russian women are very sexy and sexual and this is one reason many men want to marry a hot Russian bride..

Some Russian brides come to America or Western Europe only to find that their new life is worse than the life they left behind, maybe their new husband abusive and an alcoholic or does not have the material things they were told he had. It will be a surprise you to learn that most Russian women, that are divorced within two years usually go back to Russia, despite the idea that a Russian women will do anything possible not to return home, this is just a myth.

With this in mind you will see that many Russian women did in fact move to the West for the love of their husband and not "just" to escape Russia. If you are serious in your search for a Russian bride it would be good to do some research into Russian life and culture.

About the Author
English guy living in Russia

Marriage Registration in Thailand

2010-01-25T06:08:00.000-08:00

Marriage Registration in Thailand by Mr. Dennis P. Ramm
in International Law

Marriage Registration in Thailand

Thailand's natural wonders have made the country among one of the favorite wedding destinations in the world. But before you celebrate your dream Thai wedding, you have the option of undergoing a legal marriage registration. Marriage in Thailand is already considered valid upon registration at the local district office (Amphur).

There are two ways of processing your legal marriage registration in Thailand.

Registration by celebrating the marriage before the Registrar

It is usual for Thais to exchange vows publicly and in the presence of the Civil Registrar. This exchange of vows is also known as the betrothal ceremony. The Thai Civil and Commercial Code provides several ways of going about this process, through the following:

by affixing signature of the consenting parties in the Register;
by making a consent document wherein the name of the contracting parties are written and both have duly signed; or
by the verbal declaration before at least two witnesses.

Registration at the District Office

The Thai marriage may be registered at any local district office in Thailand. Thai couples may register their marriage any time after the wedding ceremony as well. If the couple cannot register the marriage by requesting the Registrar, they may register the marriage at the District Office, for a minimal fee.

Special Rules relating to Marriage between Foreigners

If the contracting parties are foreigners, it would be better to seek the help of law firms or immigration consultants. An ample knowledge of Thai laws as explained by experts will give the couple more security as they go about the legal registration of their marriage in Thailand.

Documents that are required for registration of a Thai marriage contracted between foreigners include the following: a copy of the passport with the arrival card; affidavit issued by their respective embassy that they have no legal impediment to marry each other; and the translated copy of the affidavits which is also certified by an approved Foreign Ministry Translator.

Consideration should be made for the drafting of a Thai prenuptial agreement prior to your wedding day in order to safeguard the assets of both parties in case of the unlikely event of a divorce in Thailand. The Thailand prenuptial agreement should be drafted by a Thailand Lawyer and can be registered on the day of the ceremony.

After Marriage Registration

A Thai marriage certificate will only be issued by the District Registrar after completing the entire process of the legal Thai marriage registration. Following the Thai Civil provisions regarding marriage, the couple will only be deemed as spouses after this process.

Siam Legal International provides Marriage in Thailand legal registration services. If you would like to order a free copy of our Legal Guide to Thailand Marriage please visit our website today! Additional services are available for a Thailand Wedding Planner. Those interested in getting married in Thailand should visit us on the web at www.siam-legal.com.

About the Author
Dennis Ramm is the Managing Partner for Siam Legal International, Thailand's largest legal service network with offices in Bangkok, Phuket, Pattaya, Hua Hin, Chiang Mai and Samui. The firm has international locations in London and Los Angeles. Siam Legal is a full-service law firm and provides a wide range of legal and visa services. Reach Siam Legal at +(66) 2-253-8100, or info@siam-legal.com.

Before You Divorce

2009-09-12T02:53:00.000-07:00

Marriage Problems

2009-09-12T02:51:00.000-07:00

Marriage Problems by Kristie Chiles

Everyone at one time or another has marriage problems. If one cannot admit this, one is not truthful. We are have problems, it is just finding a resolution to that problem that is important. What is important is before you run into marriage problems, is to anticipate them with pre-marital counseling. If you skipped that step and you are now married with problems, take heart. There are many counselors who will be happy to counsel you. Here is the important part. You were married together, you have problems together, you must get counseling together. It is so important that you go as a couple to counseling, otherwise half of the relationship and the problem is not present to present the full picture. And there are definitely two sides to every story, every argument and every marriage.
What is helpful, however, is counseling before and during marriage to gain a new, fresh perspective of what is happening in the dynamics of the couple and/or family relationship that is guised with angry and emotion by the parties experiencing it. Having a third-party objective party to listen and evaluable is very helpful and often saves a marraige or a relationship before marriage problems erupt. Being willing to admit there is a problem is the first step, not the last step or a step to divorce. The perception is important to view getting help as a helpful, healthy alternative to seeking a divorce attorney or mediator. Move forward beyond your fear and find someone who is qualified to help you. If you belong to a denomination, seek out help within your comfort zone. If not, find someone in the yellow pages that is qualified from a counseling program. You may need to try more than one counselor until you feel safe and secure within that atmosphere. Above all, seek help at once.

About the Author
Awesome marriage help here: Other help before you leap: Search government records: , Find out the owner of any cell phone or unlisted number:

Building our healthy marriage

2009-08-29T20:50:00.000-07:00

Saving Marriage

2009-08-29T20:46:00.000-07:00

Saving Your Marriage - Things To Help by Steve Carter

When a marriage experiences challenges, there are many things that can cause the difficulties. Some of these things are lack of communication; lack of interest in what the other person's involved with; low self-esteem; infidelity, and so it goes on - the list can be extensive. Yet positively, there are many things that can be done to get a marriage back on the right path.
Many couples experience relationship difficulties - recognise from the outset, you're not alone. If you are having challenges with your marriage, understand and be clear straight away that your marriage CAN be saved. It is vital that you both buy into the idea that you both really want to save it.

If you both want it you can find ways to work through the issues and end up with good, healthy balanced relationships, often stronger than before the issues occurred because of their new ability to learn how to see things from each other's perspective. You may be at a place now that you're eager to learn how to save a marriage.

When a marriage is in trouble there are several things you should immediately focus upon that may help things begin to turn around for you and your partner.

Here's some ideas for you to think about if you're finding yourself in a marriage with some issues...

A) Emotional Support - When people are trying to discover how to save a marriage, many times they may not realise that the core to the problems are down to the lack of emotional support from one or both of the partners. Try to start supporting your partner emotionally, in order to make him or her know that you care about whatever it is he or she may happen to be going through.

B) Patience - It's really key to adopt patience with your partner. Even if your partner is pushhing you to the edge of your own patience, possibly not demonstrating much patience with you, it's still important to stay calm. Getting angry, upset or irrational will not help resolve things and only compound the issues not helping matters at all.

2) Communication - Communication is not only important in marriage, it's important in any relationship if it's to work over the long-term. Both individuals need to communicate their likes, dislikes, needs, wants, desires, goals and anything else they feel needs to be chatted through. Without ongoing consistent communication, things can go badly wrong very fast in a relationship.

Emotional support, patience and communication are all important in their own way and, when not present, will all contribute to the breakdown in a marriage. Yet when these attributes are present and worked at, can all each help to revive a flagging relationship.

Do not expect immediate results from implementing any of the above. Once your marriage is in a bit of a 'grey patch', it's going to take some time and effort from both partners to get it back on the right path. The above tips will prove helpful in rebuilding a marriage but only for those couples who are committed to their marriage. However, if there seem to be issues that cannot be resolved on your own, then it may be time to seek out the services of a professional marriage counsellor. Time is a great asset in rebuilding problems in a relationship - remember that it often takes a little while to get back to the happiness you once enjoyed, so be prepared to give it time.

About the Author
Like all people at some point, Steve & Louise had challenges with their relationship and like many, decided they needed to seek some help and advice. In an effort to find ways to fix their problems, they spent months researching the mountain of relationship advice products, identifying the good and the not-so-good.. Read their independent and unbiased reports: http://www.Relationship-Reports.com - Facts, Product Info & Customer Feedback

2009-06-12T21:07:00.000-07:00

2009-06-12T21:05:00.001-07:00

3 Ways For Saving Your Marriage by Steve Mitchell

When you have problems in a marriage, it doesn't really matter exactly what the issue is, you just know that the marriage is not working and perhaps needs help. There is an array of challenges facing a modern marriage - lack of communication; lack of interest in what the other person's involved with; low self-esteem; infidelity, and so it goes on - the list can be extensive. But be clear there are many things that can be done to get a marriage back to the 'happy place' it once was at.
Many couples experience relationship difficulties - recognise from the outset, you're not alone. If you are having challenges with your marraige, understand and be clear straight away that your marriage CAN be saved. It is vital that you both buy into the idea that you both really want to save it.

If you both want it you can find ways to work through the issues and end up with good, healthy balanced relationships, often stronger than before the issues occurred because of their new ability to learn how to see things from each other's perspective. You may be at a place now that you're eager to learn how to save a marriage.

When a marriage is in trouble there are several things you should immediately focus upon that may help things begin to turn around for you and your partner.

Here's some ideas for you to think about if you're finding yourself in a marriage with some issues...

A) Emotional Support - When people are trying to discover how to save a marriage, many times they may not realise that the core to the problems are down to the lack of emotional support from one or both of the partners. Try to start supporting your partner emotionally, in order to make him or her know that you care about whatever it is he or she may happen to be going through.

B) Patience - It's really key to adopt patience with your partner. Even if he or she is trying the limits of your patience, or is not patient with you, try to stay calm. Getting upset, angry or irrational will only cause the issues to get stronger and really won't help matters.

2) Communication - Communication is not only important in marriage, it's important in any relationship if it's to work over the long-term. Both partners need to communicate their needs, wants, likes, dislikes and anything else they feel needs to be talked about. Without constant open lines of communication, things can go seriously wrong very quickly in a marriage.

Emotional support, patience and communication are all important in their own way and, when not present, will all contribute to the breakdown in a marriage. Yet when these attributes are present and worked at, can all each help to revive a flagging relationship.

Do not expect immediate results from implementing any of the above. Once your marriage is in a bit of a 'grey patch', it's going to take some time and effort from both partners to get it back on the right path. The above tips will prove helpful in rebuilding a marriage but only for those couples who are committed to their marriage. However, if there seem to be issues that cannot be resolved on your own, then it may be time to seek out the services of a professional marriage counsellor. Time is a great asset in rebuilding problems in a relationship - remember that it takes time to get back to the joy you once experienced, so give it time.

About the Author
Like all people at some point, Steve & Louise had challenges with their relationship and like many, decided they needed to seek some help and advice. In an effort to find ways to fix their problems, they spent months researching the mountain of relationship advice products, identifying the good and the not-so-good.. Read their independent and unbiased reports: http://www.Relationship-Reports.com - Facts, Product Info & Customer Feedback

2009-05-22T17:52:00.001-07:00

2009-05-22T17:38:00.001-07:00

US Marriage Visas from Thailand by Benjamin Hart

Many people have certain misconceptions when first learning about US Visas for Thai wives. US Immigration from Thailand can be a frustrating endeavor due to the fact that the qualifications for a US visa are misunderstood. Much confusion also surrounds the evidentiary requirements of both USCIS and the US Embassy in Bangkok. A US Visa for a Thai can be obtained smoothly by either gathering a large amount of relevant information or hiring an Immigration Attorney who specializes in US Visas from Thailand.
The US Tourist Visa from Thailand

The US Tourist Visa is often difficult to obtain for a Thai wife due to the US Immigration and Nationality acts presumption that anyone going to the US is doing so in an effort to immigrate. The presumption of immigrant intent has to be surmounted before the consulate official adjudicating the case will grant the tourist visa application. Where a Thai is married to a US Citizen, it becomes very difficult to overcome the presumption of immigration because the consular officer in Bangkok makes the logical inference that a Thai wife will go to the US with her citizen husband and simply remain there. Whether would be true is not the issue.

The I-130 petition for a Thai Wife

The I-130 petition is the classic method of filing for a US Immigrant Visa for a Thai wife. Those filing an I-130 petition must also show evidence that the marital relationship is bona fide. This means that the US Citizen should show that he and his Thai wife have commingled their funds, bought or rented property together, had children together, or in any other way lived as man and wife.

The K-3 Visa and the I-129f petition for a Thai Wife

Many people studying US Immigration from Thailand become confused about the K-3 visa and the I-129f petition. Generally, an I-129f petition is used for obtaining a K-1 Fiancee Visa. However, the K-3 visa was designed as an expedited application to run concurrently with the I-130 petition. Therefore, after filing out and submitting the initial I-130 application and receiving the Notice of Action 1 (a letter from USCIS stating that the I-130 petition has been received) a subsequent I-129f filing will be necessary in order to obtain a K-3 Visa for a Thai wife.

The Visa interview at the US Embassy in Bangkok

With either a tourist visa, immigrant visa, or a K-3 Visa an interview at the US Embassy in Bangkok will be required before the US Visa will be granted. At the interview it will be necessary that the US Citizen presents evidence of an ability to financially support his Thai wife. The I-864 affidavit of support is used to prove that the US Citizen can indeed support his Thai spouse at the level prescribed by the US government (currently the requirement is that the US Citizen earn an income equal to or greater than 125% of the Federal poverty guidelines in order to support a Thai wife).

Should the applicant meet all of the Embassy's requirements then the consulate will probably issue a visa to the spouse of an American Citizen. If it is a CR1 or IR1 Visa, the Lawful Permanent Residence (Green card) transmitted and therefore adjustment of status is unnecessary stateside.

About the Author
For more about US Visas from Thailand please see http://www.integrity-legal.com

Marriage in Phuket

2009-04-08T17:44:00.000-07:00

2009-04-08T17:40:00.000-07:00

Thai Women are an Ideal Option for Marriage by Article Publisher

The beauty of a woman can not only be defined after seeing her face, but it can also be defined by analyzing her character, ethnicity and mentality. If you are looking for a beautiful Thai woman, then it is advisable to search through the internet as there are a number of websites available with profiles of countless Thai Women. But, before meeting a Thai girl, a question comes in mind why Thailand? May be, it is because the people of Thailand seem to be always smiling, welcoming as well as friendly. Hence we can say that Thai women and girls are known for their beauty and intelligence for maintaining the relationships.

Being considered as one of the beautiful women in this universe, Thai women are no wonder to date with men. In fact, places such as Bangkok or Phuket draw a number of men each year in a search for Thai women. Before planning to date with a Thai woman, there are a number of things you should know - Thai girls are by nature reticent and traditional as far as man/woman relationships are concerned, they love listening neutral topics, they are very confident and beautiful and they take care of their families.

Having beautiful yellow skin and skinny body, most of Thai women's beauty is appreciated by Western guys. In fact, their faithful characteristics towards their husbands and crave of taking care of their children and family make Thai women sought after amongst men, especially western men. Some of the Asian countries such as Japan, China, Korea, Philippines, Thailand, Cambodia, Vietnam, and so on are on top for having Thai women. Apart from beauty and all, Thai girls are preferred for getting married as they can make yummy food and there is no tradition for going out with men after getting married. Being skinny, thin, and beautiful, Thai girls are loved by their husbands. In fact, after meeting Thai women, Western men love to marry them and do not want to marry with Western girl. Moreover, Women from Thai are always carry classy, cultured, traditional values. Thus, they are proven pair for a Western man.

So, the time has come to choose a Thai woman with the help of numerous websites that have profiles of a number of Thai women. You only need to make an extensive search to come across a reliable website.

About the Author
Sweetsingles.com offers a unique online dating service for those persons who want dating with Thai Women. You can find all information about nice and beautiful Thai Girls for dating and bring love in your life.

2009-03-30T18:10:00.001-07:00

2009-03-30T17:43:00.001-07:00

Getting Married in Thailand by sas_upena1

A legal marriage in Thailand consists of both parties registering their marriage in person with the local Thai Amphur (Civil Registry Office). The United States does recognize the validity of such a marriage. For American citizens marrying either Thai citizens or another American citizen, the procedure is the same. For Americans marrying a third-country national, their prospective spouse must also follow a similar procedure with their own embassy.
Procedure

1. Complete an affidavit at the American Embassy. The affidavit form, available upon request, includes all of the information required by relevant Thai law. The form must be completed and notarized at the Embassy.

2. Have the notarized affidavit translated.

3. Take the affidavit and translation to: Legalization Division Department of Consular Affairs Ministry of Foreign Affairs 3rd Floor, 123 Chaeng Wattana Road Tung Song Hong, Laksi District, Bangkok Tel:(02) 575-1057-8, Fax:(02) 575-1054

4. Take the affidavit and supporting documents to a local Amphur and register yourselves as married. The Amphur will also require the following documents: * Your American passport * If one party is Thai, the Thai citizen's identification card * If either party is under the age of twenty, written permission from the parents (with Thai translation); * If either you or your fiance have been previously married the Amphur will want to see proof that prior marriages have been terminated; either divorce or death certificates. These documents, if available, should be translated into Thai prior to presentation at the Amphur.

About the Author
Larry Westfall is a frequent traveler to Thailand and owner of Pattaya-Resort
Submitted by: Super Article Submitter

2009-03-24T21:56:00.001-07:00

2009-03-24T21:55:00.001-07:00

Marriage Statistics by Alfred Ngoasheng

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pluggedCovering this topic will surely help you to better understand how to deal with similar situations.
In the past few years, marriage statistics have painted a sad picture for the supporters of traditional marriage. With the spate of divorces that occurred in previous generations, many young adults are refusing to wed in fears of suffering through a divorce, or forcing their children to suffer a divorce. However, there are benefits to the decline in marriages.

According to many marriage statistics, the split up rate is lowering, as many young adults are slower to commit to a person. This allows for those who are committing to remain together for longer. This leads to more a more stable environment for their children. With the adoption of common-law marriages in many areas, many are opting for this route. However, like in marriage, common-law relationships require a court issued divorce to severe. Unlike marriages, it can take anywhere between Six months to 8 years to establish a common-law marriage, which results in few divorces, as those who are not serious about a relationship do not tend to enroll as common-law.

When you look at marriage statistics, it is important that you keep several key things in mind. First, the age of those surveyed within the statistic is important. Many statistics regarding marriage look at those who are wed between ages 18 and 25. These ages are known to have a higher rate of divorce. If you are elderly than this and have never been through a divorce, it may be hard to find statistics that are targeted for your situation.

In addition to this, marriage statistics tend to focus on those who have had divorces or are planning to have a divorce. They seldom look at the classes of individuals at low risk for divorce, spiritual groups among them.

Culture may affect the accuracy of marriage statistics. A lot of statistics pool from the most common denominator. If you are of a culture that is not the absolute majority in your region, the statistics may not speculate your situation.

While marriage statistics can be frighteningly accurate at times, you do not have to turn another statistic. Marriage counseling, as well as taking your time before committing to marriage ceremony can prevent you from having a divorce. Depending on your beliefs, living together with your spouse can help determine if you are truly compatible.

The most authentic marriage statistics come from sources such as the census bureau of the United States, as well as Census and Statistics Canada, as these organizations try to be as granular as possible without biased towards any one group.

Thanks for your time and effort, don't forget to check out our other articles.

About the Author
In the past few years, marriage statistics have piebald a sad picture for the supporters of traditional marriage.Please go to: http://www.marriageviews.info/Marriage-Statistics.php

2009-03-14T17:53:00.001-07:00

2009-03-12T18:16:00.001-07:00

Thai Women are an Ideal Option for Marriage by Madhu Tiwari

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pluggedThe beauty of a woman can not only be defined after seeing her face, but it can also be defined by analyzing her character, ethnicity and mentality. If you are looking for a beautiful Thai woman, then it is advisable to search through the internet as there are a number of websites available with profiles of countless Thai Women. But, before meeting a Thai girl, a question comes in mind why Thailand? May be, it is because the people of Thailand seem to be always smiling, welcoming as well as friendly.
Being considered as one of the beautiful women in this universe, Thai women are no wonder to date with men. In fact, places such as Bangkok or Phuket draw a number of men each year in a search for Thai women. Before planning to date with a Thai woman, there are a number of things you should know - Thai girls are by nature reticent and traditional as far as man/woman relationships are concerned, they love listening neutral topics, they are very confident and beautiful and they take care of their families.

Having beautiful yellow skin and skinny body, most of Thai women's beauty is appreciated by Western guys. In fact, their faithful characteristics towards their husbands and crave of taking care of their children and family make Thai women sought after amongst men, especially western men. Some of the Asian countries such as Japan, China, Korea, Philippines, Thailand, Cambodia, Vietnam, and so on are on top for having Thai women. Apart from beauty and all, Thai girls are preferred for getting married as they can make yummy food and there is no tradition for going out with men after getting married. Being skinny, thin, and beautiful, Thai girls are loved by their husbands. In fact, after meeting Thai women, Western men love to marry them and do not want to marry with Western girl. Moreover, Women from Thai are always carry classy, cultured, traditional values. Thus, they are proven pair for a Western man. So, the time has come to choose a Thai woman with the help of numerous websites that have profiles of a number of Thai women. You only need to make an extensive search to come across a reliable website.

About the Author
All of the Thai women have gone through a detailed screening; which allows us to match her with qualified asian women candidates. Sweetsingles.com is provided Thailand lady introduction for men who are seeking Thai brides

2009-03-10T12:53:00.001-07:00

Sanders

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voteWhat happen next when your spouse just declared "I'm sorry. I don't love you anymore." You know that separation followed by action of divorce will definitely fill you with dread which is natural. Even with or without children, You have put in too much time into this relationship and you will not give up without a fight.
You can certainly need to follow these advice to help you save this marriage?

Staying focus and stop panic as fear will not help you save your relationship. Just calmly find out what has gone wrong, to put your marriage back into perspective.

Compromise as mentioned everywhere is the key to successful relationship. To practise this make a list of confrontations that you are not happy between you and your spouse. Writing it down helps you to recognize your faults and helps you to make adjustments better.

Feelings of bitterness and pain will not heal any relationship. You must learn to let go with that you can think rationally and have the patience to make adjustments with a forgiving and loving heart.

Start communicating in successful manner to express your desire, yet avoiding being too submissive or a door mat. Instill positive changes and outlook in your talk.

Have friends to help you need to find strength to stop your divorce save your marriage with friends who have the same goals to help you bring strength to your thoughts and actions. They come out with solutions that you could never think of.

Talking and communicating your heart desire that you are willing to do everything to save the marriage from divorce. Cutting your bruise ego and act in a calm and forgiving manner to show your deep intent.

Change your look. Build your physic by going to a gym. Make apparent changes to your looks to show that you are still in the market to play and you do deserve value.

About the Author
Eva Sandy, a relationship expert, is here to build your marriage back into a healthy loving relationship. Advice needs followup actions to make your heart desire successful. Find FREE report http://www.ungka.com on How to save your marriage covering proven amazing tips to make a workable marriage ahead of you and Great Articles Resources on how to save your marriage on http://www.ungka.com/savemarriagestopdivorce

2009-03-10T12:50:00.001-07:00

Seek Expert Help for Your Marriage Problems! by Richard

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pluggedLike the ceremony says when you get married it should be till death do you part, and the reason that most people get married in the first place is because you really love each other. Sure some marriages are for convenience purposes but the union should be a special one and as you know it is blessed by god! Surely when you do encounter problems like most marriages will then it is definitely worth the effort to seek expert help for your marriage problems? Too many couples end up drifting apart, or the pressures of modern society lead them to cheating, neglect of their partner's needs, and loss of focus to keep the relationship on a sound footing.
Get expert help for your marriage problems that is available from a variety of sources

You do not have to look very far to find expert help for your marriage problems if you have an internet connection which many people already do have. You can invest in some stunning marriage guides like for example what is considered one of the best written by Max Voigt an expert relationship counselor doctor. This is a unique guide that will avoid you having to pay the high fees from relationship counselors when you need nothing less that expert help for your marriage problems. His unique technique has helped thousands of couples that have had their marriages on the rocks and it will definitely help you save your relationship

Dr. Max Vogt has years of experience in helping couples and this is a guide that will give you new insight into your relationship and teach you both how to solve any problems that may arise in your marriage. You will know that you need expert help for your marriage problems because you perhaps argue and fight a lot, and you also feel you may be drifting apart. You know you love each other dearly but it feels that your marriage is headed for disaster. Marriage problems are even worse if you have children; because they will suffer the most from the constant arguments fighting and bad feelings. With the right expert advice and guides with both partners also being prepared to work at renewing the bonds you had when you first got married, then expert help for your marriage problems is possible.

Guides to Compromise in Marriage when you have problems

Soon after tying the knot and taking the big step of getting married, some people may find the beginning stages difficult while adjusting to their partners' habits and different ways of doing things. Others may find the beginning of the marriage easier if they have been living together and find it more difficult keeping the relationship strong as time goes on. Relationships are precious and it is sad that partners do not attempt everything possible to cherish their relationships; especially in today's fast paced modern 21st century society. Whatever the problems you end up facing in your relationship, you will find expert help for your marriage problems guides and tips on in Dr. Max Vogts Excellent Marriage Guide!

About the Author
Learn ways to enjoy your relationship to the maximum by using advice, guides and experience from Richard. Use tips from this experienced author with confidence to help you make the right choices when things go wrong in relationships. Romance & Relationships

2009-02-28T01:30:00.001-08:00

How to Save a Marriage - Foundational Principles by Bambi Banner

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pluggedThe statistics on marriage are depressing. Half of all marriages end in divorce and half of those that don't are unhappy and unproductive. With stats like this you might wonder how you can even ask how can I save my marriage. If you are worried about your marriage and want to make it better and even save your marriage then you are better off than two thirds of the population! Contemplating filing for divorce should not be your first step when you get to this point. There are many steps to saving your marriage that you should consider first. Most of these steps require both partners to be fully committed to saving the relationship, but starting these steps alone can also begin the process of saving your marriage.
A first logical step is to consider counseling. When both partners are asking can this marriage be saved or how can I save my relationship, counseling can provide an objective third party to offer advice and counsel. It is best for both partners to go. If you partner isn't yet committed to saving your marriage then by all means start off alone. Avoiding divorce and strengthening a marriage can begin by one partner if both are not willing to work together for a common goal. Counseling is the first step to avoiding divorce and saving your marriage.

The next step, which can be done on your own, is to recognize that the perfect marriage is a myth. All marriages, even the happiest come with ups and downs and take a lot of work by both spouses. When two people come together, they bring to the relationship all of their own issues, good and bad.

There are bound to be difficult times, and perhaps a few issues that could become deal breakers if not dealt with early on. Even identical twins and lifelong friends can differ in likes and dislikes, values and beliefs. For a marriage to succeed, couples must learn to deal with whatever life brings along. Couples must be ready for the rough patches as well as the good times. They have to commit to overcoming their problems. This is the time to remember that perfection is an unrealistic goal. You don't expect it from yourself and you shouldn't expect it from your partner. Seeking perfection will only interfere with everything you are working on in saving your marriage. Everyone makes mistakes, so work with your partner to overcome the problems you face and you will both realize it is possible to "save my marriage."

The next logical are to focus on in saving your marriage are good communication skills. The ability to communicate effectively with your spouse is vital. When communication falls apart, your marriage can be on its way to trouble. Begin with total and loving honesty with your partner. Just about every issue and problem can be solved if good communication is maintained. To make this work both partners have to be willing to accept compromise which can be difficult at times but is absolutely necessary for a successful marriage. Finding that middle ground upon which a conclusion to the conflict can be built has to work for both parties before you can say to yourself that this can "save my marriage." Saving your marriage and making your marriage work depends on your collective ability to compromise. If you could do one thing to answer your question of "how can I save my marriage", the ability to compromise is your answer.

All of the above steps illustrate your commitment to your marriage and to each other. This is your next step in the long process of "saving my marriage". Marriage is the ultimate lifetime day to day commitment. This isn't disposable, marriage is not a Styrofoam cup or plastic container that you use and toss. It is much more permanent and of higher quality. There are certain things you don't abandon, and marriage should be one of them. The only time to ponder ending your marriage is if you feel there is truly no hope. Hopelessness is a dismal feeling and a terrible place to be. Fortunately it takes a long time to get to this point. The above steps can prevent you from ever feeling hopeless. If you want to say "I saved my marriage" then commitment is your microphone.

The sad reality is that after all of the above steps, and in even the hardest working couples, some marriages will not work. If the damage is too extensive and the hurt too deep then divorce can be a logical option. If there is abuse and mistreatment that cannot be resolved it is the only option. Divorce should always be your last option, and when you have repaired your relationship and are feeling happiness in your marriage then you can say yes I can save my marriage!

About the Author
Visit us to see a video about how to get your ex back. If I can get my ex back, so can you. Find out how by watching this video.

2008-11-14T23:44:00.001-08:00

Getting Married in Thailand by sas_upena1

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pluggedA legal marriage in Thailand consists of both parties registering their marriage in person with the local Thai Amphur (Civil Registry Office). The United States does recognize the validity of such a marriage. For American citizens marrying either Thai citizens or another American citizen, the procedure is the same. For Americans marrying a third-country national, their prospective spouse must also follow a similar procedure with their own embassy.
Procedure

1. Complete an affidavit at the American Embassy. The affidavit form, available upon request, includes all of the information required by relevant Thai law. The form must be completed and notarized at the Embassy.

2. Have the notarized affidavit translated.

3. Take the affidavit and translation to: Legalization Division Department of Consular Affairs Ministry of Foreign Affairs 3rd Floor, 123 Chaeng Wattana Road Tung Song Hong, Laksi District, Bangkok Tel:(02) 575-1057-8, Fax:(02) 575-1054

4. Take the affidavit and supporting documents to a local Amphur and register yourselves as married. The Amphur will also require the following documents: * Your American passport * If one party is Thai, the Thai citizen's identification card * If either party is under the age of twenty, written permission from the parents (with Thai translation); * If either you or your fiance have been previously married the Amphur will want to see proof that prior marriages have been terminated; either divorce or death certificates. These documents, if available, should be translated into Thai prior to presentation at the Amphur.

About the Author
Larry Westfall is a frequent traveler to Thailand and owner of Pattaya-Resort
Submitted by: Super Article Submitter

2008-11-04T22:43:00.001-08:00

Marriage Records Search - Discover How to Protect Yourself from Liars and Cheaters! by Victoria Underwood

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Have you ever been hurt by deceived relationship? Has your partner turned out to be married with children, something he neglected to share with you? Are you afraid of relationships because you don't want any more pain and agony? Do you know that you can simply avoid that with just an easy marriage records search?
There is no reason for you to retreat from the dating world. Sure, there are snakes out there that lie and cheat; however, there is a way around them. Instead of living a lonely life, afraid of dating and romance, get smart!

We will show you how to utilize marriage records search in order to well-equip yourself with the knowledge to recognize liars and cheaters. Picture this. You're in a new relationship. The guy is nice enough, romantic, sweet, thoughtful and attractive.

It looks like all systems are a go. Yet, there's something that just doesn't feel right. There's a certain look in his eye when he think he's alone. Sometimes, his eyes glaze over in a conversation, as if in an alternate universe altogether.

You start to get afraid and you ask yourself, "Is he like the others?' This time, there will be no sitting up at night with worry; there will be no shocking news; there will be no tears of devastation.

All you have to do is conduct a little marriage records search, find out the truth, and act accordingly. Then, you can live in peace knowing that you prevented yourself from experiencing a great amount of pain. Never allow anyone to stomp all over your heart again!

Tip No: 1

The first place to look for marriage records is to go to an online marriage license search service. This specialized search engine definitely gives you loads of information. Not only is it quick and professional, it's also one of the world's largest databases of information.

Tip No: 2

In United States most vital records information is an invaluable because it provides vital links to every state office for marriage records search. That way, no matter where you live, there is an outlet for getting the information you need.

Tip No: 3

Make sure to provide complete information on the individual. Include all names and nicknames you can think of. Make sure all details and spellings are accurate. Since you don't know the exact event or date in which your significant other was involved, specify the span of years you wish to check on when doing a marriage records search.

Now that you have the necessary marriage records search vehicles to protect yourself, don't be afraid to use them! Never find yourself flabbergasted and humiliated by a dishonest, unfaithful person. You deserve more than that and they deserve something akin to the electric chair.

Protect yourself and your children as the case may be, from liars and deceptive criminals. Nothing is more important than your comfort and happiness.

Don't jeopardize that by letting someone into your life without doing a marriage records search to assure his or her authenticity. Don't be the victim but, at the same time, don't withdraw from finding love. There are ways to do both!

About the Author
Victoria Underwood is a recognized authority on the subject of online dating safety guideline and records search. Her associate website http://www.fast-public-records-search.com, provide a wealth of FREE informative articles and resources on everything you'll ever need to know about marriage records search.

2008-07-15T04:54:00.003-07:00

Can You Define the Root Cause of Your Marriage Problems? by fng

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OK, so you know you have marriage problems, or believe that you do but can you actually define what the root cause of your marriage problems actually is? You might believe that your marital issues are so great that you can?t reconcile your differences but if you can?t actually identify the true problem how do you actually know?

You?re talking about a life long commitment here. How can you even consider throwing your marriage on the scrap heap if you can?t even define what your marriage problems are? And I?m not talking about all the petty little issues that you are trying to pin the problem on, I?m talking about the real marriage problems, the ones that started the wedge between you and are continuing to drive you apart.

If you can?t define the problems you have no chance of resolving them. You need to put some effort in here, it might seem like too much of a chore and a waste of your time but I can assure you that actually identifying what your true marriage problems / problem are, is time well spent.Click Here!

About the Author

Make money online & more ! : Click Here! Top 10 Credit Card Applications Bad-No Credit? No Problem.Apply! : Click Here!

2008-03-09T22:00:00.000-07:00

Tips to Save Marriage by Ranga

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How to save Marriage? what are the most effective ways to re-build and save marriage?

In my opinion people generally think too much complicate about the problem and allow only little or no space in the mind to think for solution to come out of it. This may be because of tension or confuse. After all, we are human and we are supposed to face the problem when it comes.

I am sure, you have enough knowledge to come out the problems. Just you have to make your mind cool and start thinking for the solution. No doubt, the amazing positive results are your's.

Your marriage may just have hit a rough patch, or it may be on the edge of divorce, but as long as you have the passion and the conviction to try, you can help to repair your relationship.

Predominantly, we need to imbibe positive thinking. Erase all negative thinkings from your subconscious and continue to Show your companion respect and affection. Love has ability to erase any kind of misunderstandings.Keep share your love.

Lack of communication is often responsible for the fall of good marriage. Sit together and communicate openly and honestly. Make a genuine, sympathetic effort to understand His/her point of view. Find out the root cause of the problem. Discuss the better ways to come out these problems. Don't look back and pick up the negative. Forget the sour times; don't remind the spouse of past faults. Ready to accept the mistake if it is from your side. Nothing wrong in accepting the mistakes. He/She is not somebody where you need to bother about losing self respect. After all, you both are Soul Mates.

Remember those romantic days that you have spent together. Let me ask you, Where those days have gone to? what happened to that happiness and passion?

I am sure that, still that love and affection is there with in you.Just you need to concentrate to bring the romantic spark back into your relationship.

You may need the expert advice of a professional/marriage counselor to become aware of the ways to save a marriage, and how to implement them into your daily lives. To know more about 'How to Save Marriage', please visit:

Tips to save Marriage

Other Resources:

Marriage Tips and Home and Family Improvement Tips

About the Author

Ranga is an expert in various subjects. Please visit Top eBooks and Software Downloads, Popular Downloads Online and eBooks Downloads. Thank you

2008-03-09T21:58:00.001-07:00

How to Make a Teenage Marriage Successful by Angel Cuala

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Teenage marriage has a bigger tendency of separation than those with the mature age, as they say. This may be true because marriage requires maturity and a lot of sacrifice. However, one must remember that there are a lot of marriages that end up nothing and the cause has nothing to do with age. Therefore, we can say that teenage marriage can also be successful. Just to make myself clear, I am not in favor of teenage marriages but if you are planning to marry at a very young age and it seems that nobody can stop you, the following tips are for you:

Do not marry because of the baby. Let us say that something that should not happen has happened, and of course you have to keep the baby. If you are planning to get married just for the sake of the baby, forget it. Although many would disagree with me, I still insist that you should think twice first before getting married. You cannot cover up a mistake with a bigger mistake. Being not married to someone who have your child does not mean you cannot be a good parent. Marriage is a union of two people, who are deeply in love with each other with or without a child.

Avoid having a baby. By not having a baby for now, it means that both of you can work hard and save some money for the future. You should also learn a lot of knowledge before deciding to be a parent. This is because teenagers usually find children as obstruction to enjoy life as young couples. Although some would say that it is better to have children at a young age to minimize generation gap, most young people cannot endure the hardship of taking care of babies. Do not be in a hurry to be a parent because there is still a lot of time ahead of you.

Finish your studies. Try your best to finish a good course in college even if you are already married. This will be your greatest asset in the future. This will not only help you find a better job, it will also be your guide to your future children when they are already in school. Not to mention that you will also be an inspiration to them, considering that finishing school while raising a family is very difficult. You will also earn a lot of respect from your spouse and in laws by proving to them marriage is not a hinder to fulfill a dream.

Enjoy your youth. Do not let marriage take away your time to enjoy your youth. Although you already need to work hard, it is still alright to attend some social gatherings as long as your spouse knows about it. But of course, it is better if both of you go together in parties. Moreover, you should also consider avoiding flirting the way teenagers do simply because you are now committed. Younger spouses are usually more possessive and insecure than the older ones. This is one of the common reasons of a failed teenage marriage.

Seek for advices. You should do this a lot because you lack experience in life when you got married. Your parents and in laws are the best advisers you can learn from. Although you might think their advices are hard to follow because of your age, you can be sure that they always want the best for you. Accept the fact that you still need their guidance and support. If you did not listen to them when they are against that you get married, you better listen to them this time. As the saying goes, experience is the best teacher.

Marriage is not about being young or old; it is about commitment and accepting responsibilities.

About the Author

I am a Filipino engineer who recently found himself more comfortable in writing letters rather than numbers. For more quality articles on how to have a successful marriage, and what marriage is all about, please feel free to visit Successful Marriage Tips at http://www.whatmarriageisallabout.blogspot.com.

2008-03-08T03:58:00.001-08:00

Thai Wives and Girlfriends: A few stories by James Spellman

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Anyone who lives in Thailand for a while hears stories about western men (or farang as we are known here) and the bizarre behaviour of their Thai wives and girlfriends. To those looking from the outside it is often a source of amusement. Sometimes it is just strange behaviour. Other times it is a shocking willingness to totally screw over their farang partners.

Some of the things these women do just make you laugh but there are other times they take your breath away with the sheer audacity of their actions; their ability to put aside any semblance of morals and just scheme away to their own ends. There are other times when it is just their plain stupidity that takes the breath away.

The following four stories all happened around my own little housing estate in Phuket where there are quite a few farang-Thai couples. These stories are just a small sample of the things Thai women can get up to.

Unreasonable Behaviour

A young European guy and his Thai girlfriend have lived in the house opposite me for the last three months. They are both very sociable and quickly introduced themselves. We sometimes share a few drinks in the garden He seems like an easy-going guy. She is very chatty and usually happy. She doesn't drink, smoke, gamble or take drugs which is a promising start for Thai girlfriend material.

The problem is she regularly goes completely off the rails. Every two or three days they have a huge argument. I say argument, but in fact it is usually only her voice you can hear screaming abuse. She throws things, windows get broken and then there are tears and drama in the street.

The upshot is usually that she packs her bags and declares she is leaving for good. A big show is made of this. She comes to say goodbye to us because she is never going to see us again. She calls a taxi and then stands outside her house shouting to her boyfriend that she is leaving for good.

He quietly stays inside and ignores the whole charade. The thing is we all know she isn't leaving. She may be back the same day. If not, she will return the next day somehow looking triumphant. In fact, this pretence of leaving has become so shallow that instead of taking her packed bags, she now makes a habit of hiding them in our house so she doesn't have the hassle of carrying them.

What are the arguments about? Some of them are the usual accusation that he is playing around with other women. Often, it is that he has spent money on something she thinks is wasteful. But it is HIS money! He pays her a generous allowance. When Thai women do this routine of trying to stop their farang boyfriends spending their money, it is not because they want to save him money. There is a simpler motive. The more the boyfriend spends, the less there is leftover for her to squeeze out of him.

This girl has already told my wife she has three other farang boyfriends. This is one of the things us westerners just don't get. It is not only that they play these games and deceive their boyfriends. They think it is something to boast about and if they can boast about it right under their boyfriend's nose, all the better. Why she thought my wife wouldn't tell me, I don't know. She probably assumes all Thai women deceive their farang partners and that my wife would be impressed at her cunning.

I wouldn't get involved in other people's relationships so I will not be telling this guy about the other boyfriends. Anyway, I don't think he is such a fool. He is returning to Europe this week and I doubt if he will be continuing his relationship with this particular Thai girl - but you never know.

Gambling

The previous occupants of this same house were a European guy and his Thai wife. He worked in Europe for six months a year and lived in Phuket for the other six months. He had been doing this for years and when he was in Phuket, they always seemed to have a good relationship. The problem was that for the six months he was away, his wife had to entertain herself and her vice was gambling.

Gambling really does seem to be a major problem for some Thai women. I know several of the Thai wives on our estate play a regular card game. They all say the same thing. It is just a bit of fun for small money. I have seen them play and it is not for fun. They get very intense, there is little conversation and although the stakes start small, they quickly grow. I have heard of women winning or losing as much as 30,000 baht in these 'fun' games.

There seems to be something in the Thai mentality that leaves them very open to gambling addiction. Perhaps it is their belief in lucky numbers and fate. Whatever it is, there is good reason why gambling is illegal in Thailand. It is an endless source of problems, especially for Thai women with money and time on their hands such as wives of farang.

So every morning this Thai woman set off for her local card game. Sometimes she would be gone for two or three days - they really can play that long. She had been doing this for years and I guess she wasn't losing too much. But then the problems started.

The first sign was when she started asking to borrow money. At first, it was only small sums that we were happy to give her. But then she wanted 10,000 baht. I knew this was a sign of a serious problem. She was chasing her losses. The only way she could repay the money was if she got lucky at cards so I refused her the loan.

Of course, there are other ways to borrow money in Thailand. Once one of these girls is on the slope she will keep sliding. Soon there were rough looking Thai men appearing on her doorstep demanding repayment. She sold her motorbike and started renting one instead. She sold jewelry and furniture but used the money to chase her losses and the loan sharks kept appearing. She started disappearing for a week at a time. It was obvious her situation was out of control. Then she was gone.

I don't think the loan sharks got her. She packed her bags in the middle of the night and ran. There were rumours about how much she owed and for those sorts of sums she would have to do a good job of disappearing. There were calls from her husband asking why he could not contact his wife. When he returned to Phuket, there was no sign of her. She had not returned to her family, or at least not that they would admit. She just ran away from it all, the debts and the marriage.

Pretend Pregnancies

A good friend of mine was very pleased that his wife was expecting their first child. His wife's sister was also pleased but for slightly different reasons. She wanted copies of the ultrasound scans of the foetus. She had an Australian boyfriend who she was siphoning like an old banger. She had already twice convinced him she was pregnant and needed medical expenses. Then of course, she had two miscarriages and so needed more medical expenses.

Now she was trying the same routine for a third time but he was proving a little harder to convince. He wanted to see the ultrasound scans. So what good fortune that her sister just happened to be pregnant.

My friend absolutely put his foot down. No way would he let his child be used as a tool in a Thai bargirl scam. It is one thing to stand back and watch these girls rip off their farang boyfriends. It is a totally different thing to play an active role in the deception.

Without a copy of an ultrasound scan, her bluff was called and she was caught out. The Aussie boyfriend dumped her. All kinds of drama followed. She had a Thai boyfriend and together they were living the high life. Without her benefactor, she quickly ran up huge debts. The Thai boyfriend left her. She got her mother to take out a loan. She defaulted on the loan and her mother spent two days in prison until my friend paid her bail - after all, she is also the mother of his wife.

So much drama and heartache that you think she might actually learn her lesson. And then would you believe it - the Aussie boyfriend decided to give her another chance. Now she is spending his money like water again and convinced that everything she did has worked out for the best.

Oh yeah, one other thing she hasn't told the Aussie boyfriend. He is very keen to start a family but she cannot have children. She is infertile.

Totally Screwed

All these previous stories fade in significance compared to what happened to this guy. I don't know him personally but I know his neighbours. He worked in Bangkok and came to Phuket at weekends to see his wife. Their relationship was already rocky and they were working towards agreeing an amicable split. They owned the house but there was still an outstanding mortgage.

One weekend he returned home to find it deserted. Everything of value was gone. He was confused and started looking for an explanation. He was soon given one by a bank representative who arrived shortly afterwards. The bank has repossessed the house.

"That cannot be" said this guy. "I pay the mortgage every month". The bank guy explained - "that mortgage is with a different bank. Your wife took a second mortgage on the property and she has not paid."

The farang guy realised he was totally screwed. He started looking for a way out but there was none. Can I take over the payments? It is too late. I will get a lawyer! It is too late. We have been taking action for months. It is finished now.

In a blind fury, this farang guy started smashing up the house. The bank called the police and they arrested him. The house was no longer his property so he would have to pay for the damages.

Over the next few days, the full extent of his wife's treachery became apparent. She had not only taken a second mortgage on the property but also she had used it as collateral for a loan from the local mafia. She had taken the money and disappeared. There were now two banks and the local mafia arguing over who had claim to his house.

I had met his wife only once a few weeks before. She came around our house asking for a 100,000-baht loan. She said she would write up a contract and pay back 110,000 baht the very next week. Naturally, we refused this generous offer. She must have known even then that she had no intention of paying. She carried on doing the rounds until she found a sucker willing to give the loan. It was actually a local Thai guy she fleeced.

It is a small world. Another friend of mine recently met this farang guy working offshore. He was working all the hours he could get to pay off his debts. The bank with the original mortgage has insisted he must pay it off or they will have him blacklisted from Thailand. He still loves Thailand and his life here and does not want to be blacklisted.

Conclusion

I certainly don't want to generalise and say all Thai women are scheming or crazy. All four of these women had one thing in common; they had all worked in the sex industry. That is not to say that all Thai girls from the sex industry are bad. It is not even that all Thai girls who have never worked in the sex industry are good. However, on the whole this sort of behaviour is much more likely to come from women who have worked in the sex industry.

The tourist sector of the sex industry is all about extracting as much money as possible from the customers. The girls learn to lie, scheme and play their customers like a fiddle. They can take the same mentality into their long-term relationships. They are still playing the game and unfortunately, the basis of their relationship is how much money they can squeeze from their farang.

I do know plenty of guys who have great Thai wives. I would go as far as to say that the sort of stories above are the minority and most men who settle in Thailand find a great woman. The cultural differences will always cause a few difficulties and Thai women certainly do a few things we find strange. As long as both sides are willing to compromise then it can all work out fine.

This is not a purely Thai phenomenon. I know men who have been fleeced by women in their own countries. And the divorce rates in the west are so high that there is really no point in harping on about the number of failed farang-Thai relationships. This devious side of the Thai female is not a universal truth. However, these stories do seem to be more common here than elsewhere. I think it is mostly a by-product of the way many of these relationships started.

About the Author

The author has lived in Phuket, Thailand for seven years. If you want to read more about the colourful island of Phuket then visit http://www.knowphuket.com where you will find more articles and visitor information.

2008-03-06T04:10:00.001-08:00

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whereby the original author's information and copyright must be included.
Stop Your Divorce And Save Your Marriage by J. Foley

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You hear this over and over,'how do I save my marriage'. Well you can stop your divorce and save your marriage, all that matters is whether or not YOU REALLY WANT TO save your marriage and your relationship. Sometimes when you are experiencing a lot of marital problems and issues, divorce becomes an option without realizing that you really can stop your divorce and save your marriage.

Most marriages start to fail when you stop listening to each other. Open communication is very important to stopping your divorce and saving your marriage. Marriage has its ups and downs and sometimes you get confused on how to make things work. Jobs, kids and other responsibilities also make it hard to focus on each other and sometimes marriage becomes a routine instead of a happy, healthy and loving relationship, and so you find your spouse and yourself are maybe facing a potential divorce situation, but you truely love your spouse and want to save your marriage.

Nobody enters a marriage with divorce on their minds for the future, but it is still happening at an alarmingly high rate. The divorce rate is 50% for first time marriages, but it's a whopping 60% for second time marriages. There are a lot of couples who give up on their marriage unnecessarily, not knowing what to do and they think ending the marriage is the best solution. Sometimes when you are experiencing a lot of marital problems and issues, divorce becomes an option without realizing that you can stop your divorce and save your marriage.

Some people choose to have a counselor or therapist help them save their marriage, and this is definitly a viable avenue to seek out , but some so-called marriage therapists sometimes tend to confuse the issues, pitting one person against the other and a lot of times things just some how, do not get resolved. So you might want to give this some great thought before you pay some therapist $60 to $150 or more to make your marriage worse. Many couples give up their marriage and go through so much pain because they do not know how to deal with their marital problems. But these easy steps will help you save your marriage, and will show you how to save your marriage with "Stop Your Divorce And Save Your Marriage, a must read!

Here is just SOME of the marriage saving action-advice you will find inside "Stop Your Divorce And Save Your Marriage":

(Pages 8-9)Little known facts you may not have considered involving the economics of divorce (including the true financial cost of ending your marriage). (Page 16)Why negative thinking may be the real culprit behind your failing marriage. (Page 20)7 simple pleasures of marriage you may have forgotten about. (Page 21)The unspoken, unwritten 2nd contract of marriage that successful couples abide by. (Page 22)The secret to a successful marriage through partnership. (Page 23)The difference between the sexes and how to use it to help (not hurt) your marriage. (Pages 31-32)A new way for looking at money and finances (that might save your marriage). (Pages 33-34)How to recognize turning points in your marriage and stop last chances from becoming lost chances. (Pages 35-36)5 fundamentals that every marriage expert or counselor agrees is crucial to your relationships happiness. (Pages 37-38)What friendship means inside a marriage (and how to find it). Basically it really comes down to this,...if you really want to stop your divorce and save your marriage, you will eventually come to the realization and learn to accept that you and your spouse are not perfect and have to love each other unconditionally,

When you click the link below now, you can stop your divorce and save your relationship before it's too late. With one in three marriages breaking up every year and the resulting effect it has on you and your family, you should at least give yourself and your marriage every opportunity to succeed. Do you want to put an end to the stress and anxiety of not knowing what to do to save your troubled marriage, then take action now and check out this report today. If this book does not help you save your marriage, or you are not happy with it for any reason, you will get a full refund guaranteed.

Article Written By J. Foley

About the Author

J. Foley Has A Very Informative Book On This Very Subject, A Must Read, And You Can Check It Out Here!

2008-03-04T01:29:00.001-08:00

Here Is A Marriage Tip For The Couples by Francis K. Githinji

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People are usually madly in love before they get married. What exactly happens after they become a married couple? It beats my understanding because i can't comprehend how two love birds can fail to workout out their relationship. Love is always a chronic disease which is cured by marriage. Does this mean that after marriage there is no love? This should not be the case. That special institution should be made to work at all costs. Married couples should equip themselves with enough marriage tips as a weapon to prepare for wars when they rear their ugly heads. When you are starting for this journey through life, use all the marriage tips you can gather because it determines your destiny. When you are dull and their is no life in your marriage, retrieve old memories as a marriage tip to rejuvenate your commitment and attraction to each other. When you remember happy times together, it does the magic and brings back the fire in your marriage. May be it is a funny picture you took together or a Chinese dinner pack you took sometime back. It renews the attachment or even makes it stronger.

There will always be someone else better than you and another one worse than you. Marriages fail when comparison is involved. A good marriage tip is to avoid comparing your marriage with another one. Their will always be couples who are making more money, more social than you and may be seem happier. Accept what you have and make it better as a couple. Women especially bring marriage problems when they start admiring a seven sitter room in one of her friend's house. Do not put unnecessary pressure on your spouse. A marriage tip dictates that you should understand that she/he cannot achieve the same things with your friends. You do not know what happens in their privacy. Things could be worse. If a marriage becomes competition among couples, then it is bound to fail.

I really agree with you that in laws sometimes can be a pain in the neck. What do we do? Assume they don't exist? That would be a good recipe to a failing marriage. My marriage tip is, look for something you can use to come into terms with your in laws. I am sure they must have something you like. Compliment his mother's cooking and laugh at his old father's jokes. Pay for his sister's hairdo. This shows your spouse that you love his people and he/she will love you for that. He might be in the know that his/her people are not so easy to put up with but your effort to tolerate them will do a great favor to your marriage.

"I know my wife is my number one fan". I heard my pastor say that last Sunday. I thought of sharing this with you because you will agree with me it is a great marriage tip. My pastor's marriage is one to be envied. He was sure even if he preaches and everyone else fails to listen to him, his lover would be all ears. What a sweet feeling. Compliment him for what he does. When your spouse gets a promotion at his/her work place, shout and scream in celebration. This is what we call an island of piece. Make your marriage work.

Francis K. Githinji Is An Online Dating Expert. His Latest Project Marriage Tip Shows How The Power Of Online Dating Can Be Harnessed Internationally and With Great Success, Or You Could Post Your Valued Comments On His Blog At Marriage Tip

About the Author

Francis K. Githinji Is An Online Dating Expert. His Latest Project Marriage Tip Shows How The Power Of Online Dating Can Be Harnessed Internationally and With Great Success, Or You Could Post Your Valued Comments On His Blog At Marriage Tip

2008-03-01T01:43:00.001-08:00

Finding A Good Marriage Counselor Is Not Easy by Charlie Reese

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Are you looking for a marriage counselor? The good news here is that there are plenty to be found on the Internet. The bad news is that it's usually just for a few minutes. A marriage counselor can be found on mostly any counseling website in the psychic world. As you walk through life, it's important to remember that you are supposed to find your way. Many people around the world enjoy getting marriage counseling and it's important to find a marriage psychic counselor that you truly enjoy talking to. A marriage psychologist is someone that usually offers their services to you at a set price or a price per minute. At first, they may offer you some free introductory minutes or perhaps a first time marriage counseling session. Either way, a marriage therapist can help you to find your way through many obstacles that may present themselves in front of you.

You are not alone in this psychic world and many online marriage counselors can often pick up on the problems and situations that surround you daily. They will help you to find your way. A marriage counselor is someone that every person craves. A marriage counselor can often help you to get back on track again in your life. Many marriage counselors from around the world have been there to help others to find themselves in many different ways. If you are looking for a marriage counselor, then you may want to try to find one on a popular therapy website that offers a five star rating system in which you can rate an individual marriage counselor for their performance during a marriage counseling session. If you are wondering about your own life and asking yourself which marriage counselor you should choose, then you may want to start out by asking yourself what kind of marriage counselor you would like to have. There are so many different types of marriage counselors. There are: divorce psychologists, family therapists and adolescent counselors. If you are not sure what each of these is, then you may want to type into the marriage therapist search box above.

When you find the marriage counselor that you are looking for, then you should speak with the marriage psychologist and ask questions about love, career, business or any other type of question that you may have. A marriage psychic counselor can be found almost anywhere and it's important to feel comfortable with your marriage counselor so that you will be able to determine what psychic reading is particularly helpful to you. The more open you are to the individual marriage counselor, the better off you will be in the long run. If you are nervous about getting a marriage counseling session for the first time, then just remember that you are not alone.

Many marriage counselors are on the Internet today looking to help people with their problems and issues that they may be going through. Remember that you are not alone and that you are welcome in the marriage counseling community. You may want to jot down some questions to ask a marriage counselor when you first meet them so that you can focus more on the marriage counselor's words than on thinking about what question you are going to ask. A marriage counselor is not hard to find if you know where to look.

About the Author

Charlie Reese is a part time psychic and writer. He also likes researching love insurance ideas and love psychics.

2008-02-25T00:46:00.001-08:00

Maturity Is Essential Before Marriage by Kenneth Scott

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Doesn't weaning refer to infants? Not adults on the way to the altar?

However, when you think about it, how many of us are grown up or mature enough to get married? However loudly one might pooh-pooh the idea of being immature, it would be worthwhile to sit down and do an objective take on the subject. Because it is essential that all of us who would like to make a success of our marriages have to be sure that we are still not tied to our parents' apron strings.

Marriage is a contract and a full-time career. Like all other careers, one has to be qualified for the job and continuously hone one's skills to do well in that job. In a regular career, one sheds the student world and accepts the new responsibility of the work ethic in the office or workplace.

In marriage, do we shed the child mode and readjust ourselves to the adult mode? Most of us don't. We go into marriage still wanting to be looked after, be pampered and be allowed the freedom of throwing a tantrum when things don't go our way. Very much like what we did with our parents. Only, we don't like it if we are corrected.

Very often, a woman marries a father figure so she can continue being "Daddy's little girl" and a man marries a "mother figure" so he can be, well, mothered. Sometimes, we can be like infants in that we choose the "best looking toy" to carry around little realizing that does not always bring us the happiness of the comfortable old cuddly bear we slept with!

Yes, it is necessary for us to "grow out" of our parents.This in no way is a criticism of them. It is a journey we have to undertake. It means we stop thinking like we did as children. Then we view our parents as separate entities and love them the better for it, no longer taking them for granted.

This is the first step to "freeing" ourselves for marriage. And we need to prepare for it. By developing skill sets that help us cope, help us excel. This is when we can proudly say that we have become our "own man" or "own woman".

About the Author

To find more advise and tips on marriage visit http://marriage-directory.com

2008-02-22T03:04:00.001-08:00

Do We Need To Be Sexually Compatible For A Marriage To Last by Kenneth Scott

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If we were to believe everything the books and glossies tell us, nothing could be more important in a marriage than sex and sexual compatibility. And there are any number of therapists, how-to books and videos available to reinforce this viewpoint.

Yet, is this really true? Is this the foundation stone marriage is based on? Given that, there should be so many marriages that should have worked but don't. Not every divorce happens because of the sex not being good. And not every marriage lasts because of great sex.

Why then, this hype about sexual compatibility? Is it the age we live in? An age when sex has come out of the closet and therefore must be the be-all and end-all of everything? Will this too pass? If we go beyond the fads of the day and seek deeper for answers, we will no doubt find that it isn't easy to paint such a one-dimensional picture of marriage.

Marriage is such a complex relationship, an interaction and melding of two people on so many different levels, all interconnected and intertwined. When there is a short circuit in these systems, there has to be a scapegoat and what better than sexual incompatibility, the flavor of the day! And yet, very often, all other things gong well, sexual compatibility just grows and blossoms.

Trial marriages today are the order of the day and it is mostly to do with more than compatibility - it is to do with sexual compatibility. That's how much influence the hype about this subject has had. But, like wine, shouldn't sex grow and become better with time? Maybe what is needed in this area is guidance on how to make things better, not just how to make the techniques better.

Love and romance can be the greatest triggers to good sex. The art and science of technique can enhance it. Very often, couples bring to bed a whole host of the day's problems and sex ends up being the culmination of these pent-up emotions. Tensions, unacknowledged slights, words spoken in haste...they can all end up in sexual incompatibility. Or, then again, it could result in a great sexual coming-together but what about the morning after and back to everyday life?

The trick is to see marriage as a whole, not piecemeal. A holistic viewpoint very often heals even the most bitter feuds. Putting the blame on sexual compatibility, or rather the lack of it could be a very blinkered viewpoint.

About the Author

To find more advise and tips on marriage and sexual compatibility visit http://marriage-directory.com

2008-02-19T05:12:00.001-08:00

The Keys To A Successful Marriage by Steve Hill

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What are the keys to a successful marriage? Are you in a marriage that you feel is failing? Do you think that you have made a mistake in marrying your partner? In this article I am going to be writing about what makes a happy marriage, I hope the article is of benefit to its readers.

Let's face it; sustaining a happy marriage over the longer term is not easy. People change, people make mistakes, people grow old, the passion dwindles out and children appear. These are aspects that many people see as a negative, they should however be seen in a positive light.

We all change and that has to be a good thing, we are developing and becoming more educated with age.

We all make mistakes; that is just life. It is ensuring that we learn from them which is the important thing.

Of course we all become older, we should however be grateful that we are in a relationship and not having to grow old on our own as this can be very lonely and quite scary.

Over time in any relationship the passion will dwindle. This passion can however be turned into romance. Taking your partner to Venice, Rome or Paris is likely to re-ignite that passion from time to time; it just takes a bit of imagination and thought.

In the majority of marriages there are likely to be children born out of the union. This without doubt is a joy to behold and should make the relationship stronger.

In any relationship the most important aspect is the ability to forgive. We all make mistakes, some are bigger than others but it takes a strong person to forgive. Good luck with your marriage.

About the Author

Steve Hill is a webmaster from Birmingham, he has interests in a number of websites including: stuttering stuttering therapy dvd replication

2008-02-19T04:16:00.001-08:00

Marriage Is about Compromise by Kenneth Scott

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Everyone has heard the old adage that marriage is all about compromise. That should not always be the case, though! Every issue should not be about compromise or your marriage will seems like a constant business negotiation, and someone will always feel slightly cheated. This can lead to resentment and bitterness. While many issues in marriage do require a great deal of compromise, sometimes you should just give in. In other words, pick your battles wisely.

Each spouse in a marriage should not be giving 50% all of the time. That is only half of what you have to give. You should be giving your all, 100%, all of the time. Then, you both will be giving your marriage all of your commitment and effort. While meeting halfway in the name of compromise is important, you should be willing to give in at times as well, for the sake of your spouse's happiness. Romance isn't really romance when it's only convenient for you or your partner. Romantic holidays or occasions such as St. Valentine's Day or birthdays are only truly romantic if you go think of them the rest of the year. That doesn't mean spending a lot of money, either. Offer to stop on the way home to pick something up for dinner. Drop your spouse off and pick him or her up at the airport for business trips. Pitch in with the housework, cooking, and childcare without being asked to.

Instead of mulling over how to be romantic, simply do it. Romance is in the little gestures. If you spend too much time thinking about it, you will constantly talk yourself out of it. You will worry about rejection, and be afraid that your gesture will go unnoticed. Don't think about it, just do it!

The first step in becoming more romantic is by listening to your spouse. Not just listening to what they want, but listening to their successes, their failures, their feelings. By listening to your spouse with your eyes and ears and heart, you will show that person how committed you are to him or her. That deed will not go unnoticed! You will get an in-depth look into your spouse's soul, and will know exactly what to do to keep the romance alive with him or her. Being supportive and thoughtful will give you the opportunity to fall in love all over again.

About the Author

To discover more articles and advise about marriage visit http://marriage-directory.com

2008-02-16T18:50:00.000-08:00

Chinese Marriage Traditions by Henry Fong

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The procedures of an ancient Chinese marriage are captured in the phrase "Three (3) Letters and Six (6) Etiquettes".

What are the three letters?

The Three Letters are the engagement letter, the delivery of gifts letter and the taking of the bride letter.

In ancient times, if a man is interested in a woman, he will engage a middlemen (a middle-women actually) to explore the possibility and if appropriate to convey his intentions to the woman's family. If the woman's family finds him acceptable, they will notify him and he can make the official proposal by delivering the formal letter of engagement on an auspicious date.

At this stage the women's family can still say no to the proposal. As you would expect there are still a lot of things to sort out and to negotiate over.

If the proposal is accepted, the next step is to deliver wedding gifts to the woman's family. These wedding gifts which are normally expensive are accompanied by the 'Delivery of Gift' letter which is essentially a list of items and quantity much like a delivery order! By signing this letter and taking delivery of the gifts, it signifies the women's family acceptance of the marriage.

The itemized 'Delivery of Gift' letter is also a safeguard against pilferage by the delivery team!

The third letter is known as the 'Taking the Bride' Letter as it is the letter that the groom produces when he arrives at the bride's home on the wedding day. Upon acceptance of the letter, the bride is deemed to have joined the groom and become a member of the groom's family.

It is no wonder why the bride mothers weep uncontrollably on wedding days. It is like losing a daughter!

What then are the Six Etiquettes?

It refers to the six main procedures in an ancient Chinese marriage. It includes the official proposal, the checking of Ba Zi (compatibility using a system of Chinese Astrology), selection of auspicious date for the wedding, delivery of gifts, confirmation of wedding dates and finally the wedding itself.

Once the man has set his eyes on the girl, he sends an official proposal to the woman's family. Once the proposal is accepted, he will seek the services of an astrologer to determine if they are compatible. Research will also be done to ensure that there is no blood relationship between them. At this stage the engagement can be called off if they are not compatible or if their blood line are somewhat connected.

The next step is the selection of auspicious date for wedding followed by followed by the delivery of gifts.

After the gifts are accepted, the woman's family will seek an astrologer to check the auspiciousness of the proposed wedding.

This followed by the six and final etiquette, the wedding itself!

About the Author

Henry Fong
Feng Shui Consultant Absolutely Feng Shui

2008-02-16T18:49:00.001-08:00

How to Keep Your Marriage Alive by Christine Collette

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Divorce statistics around the world are growing all the time and couples therapy doesn't seem to be helping. Over 50% of couples who go to therapy sessions end up divorced and only around 20% of those seeing therapists actually experience improvements within their marriage. So how do you avoid becoming just another statistic? It is my aim to answer this question within this article. I will discuss the reasons why many people are unable to move on from past hurts and show you some ways that you can overcome the hard times.

A common mistake, and unfortunately an accepted form of therapy, is taking a trip down memory lane and digging up all the past hurts and mistakes within a marriage. This does not help matters at all. If you were feeling content and happy then someone told you to start remembering all the times you felt really sad, how do you think you would end up feeling? Your brain doesn't filter the reality from the memory so clearly. So if you focus on sad or bad feelings your brain tells the rest of you to follow suit and start feeling that way. This is the process that a lot of actors use when they're asked to cry on the spot. The same applies to your relationship. If we spend our time dwelling on past issues and old problems they come straight to the forefront of our minds and lives and we feel the hurt all over again.

Now, I'm not saying you should 'sweep your troubles under the rug' or 'bottle them up for another day'; quite on the contrary. You should realize the simple fact that the troubles you had in the past are indeed, past. Today is a new day. And yes, it does sound like a cliché but if you're serious about taking a step forward within your marriage then you really need to grab hold of this concept and run with it.

Another skill that is paramount to learn is being prepared to change the way you think and react to things on a daily basis. We all have learned certain ways to react to situations. And they seem like natural reactions because we've been doing them most of our lives. It can be something as simple as wincing when we see something painful on the television, to relationship issues like going on the war path when your partner rushes out the door and forgets to kiss you goodbye. If you can learn to identify how you react to things within your marriage, I mean really take a look at your own behavior, then you might find that some of your reactions are really quite silly or pointless and make a not so great minute one morning turn into a hell of a week all round. How often have you noticed that you are reacting like your parents used to? Most of this behavior is learned, and can be un-learned as well with a little work on your part.

Remember that day back when you were standing there facing your beloved and you vowed to love them and be with them forever? There are so many of us who disregard the power of our marriage vows. We tend to think that divorce must be normal and ok since so many people are doing it. The truth is the opposite. Divorce is not normal or ok. It's painful, difficult and highly stressful, rated up there with being told you have a terminal disease. The bottom line about vows is that you personally made the commitment to follow through. It's a decision you made with a sound mind and love in your heart. Love doesn't die and neither should our promises. Sometimes we forget these simple things. But remembering why you made that promise in the first place is a great place to start when you feel your marriage take a downward slide.

Gaining control over our emotions is another important area to look into. Something that should be taught during our early childhood yet is often just left on cruise mode. As adults we often think it is ok to allow anger to overwhelm us. We even use it as an excuse, "but I was feeling so angry, I didn't mean what I said." People compare getting angry to being intoxicated on hallucinogenic drugs. They seem to think they can get away with extremely hurtful things just because they are angry. This is a lie through and through. Anger is just another emotion and a strong one at that; all the more reason to prevent it from getting out of control. You wouldn't say to your loved one "I didn't really mean to say that I appreciate you, it's just that I was feeling so happy." It's the same thing. Silly huh? The sooner we learn to control our negative emotions instead of allowing them to control us, and worse, thinking they are reasonable excuses, the sooner our marriages and relationships will grow stronger.

If you feel that your marriage is on a downward spiral and you truly want to transform your marriage into something strong and long-lasting then have a good think about what I've shared with you here and continue to work at it on a daily basis. Marriage isn't easy, that's a fact, but as the saying goes, nothing worth really having ever is.

About the Author

34 year old,Mother of two.
Married for 8 wonderful years.

2008-02-16T18:48:00.001-08:00

How To Remain Strong In Marriage by Jimmy Cox

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The following questions suggest a couple of the crises which married couples may have to face. If you at least give some thought to these deep questions now, you will be able to handle them better if they occur at some time in your marriage.

What would you do if your marriage partner died?

The most difficult problem will be emotional. The loss of a loved one is always a shock and a strain. The problems here involved are so well recognized that we need only mention them. Other emotional problems are centered around the readjustment of your future.

Such an adjustment is usually less difficult for a man. He can go on with his vocational plans, much as he had expected to do. If he is still under fifty or so he can usually find a suitable woman whom he can marry, and thus pick up the broken strands of his plans for a home and family.

The woman usually faces a more difficult situation. Some will have other opportunities to marry, and thus be able to continue their hopes and dreams. Many girls will not. The death of a lover or husband will end for them any chances for marriage. The loss of these possibilities will usually mean a rather complete readjustment of their vocational programs.

If the girl has already been well trained to earn her living, as every girl should be, her vocational problems will be less serious. If she is not so trained, her vocational problems may be serious, especially if she is widowed with children to support. How would you handle the problem of adultery?

This question, like the previous one, may raise an unpleasant subject. But it is one which you should face. Adultery is much more common than premature death. We urge that you come to a clear understanding regarding the sex standards which you expect of each other after marriage. A definite agreement on this point will give you a basis for a sound approach to the problem of adultery. Any discovered violation of your agreement will necessarily be serious. Yet like any crisis, this possibility is one for which you should be emotionally prepared, and intellectually have formulated some tentative policy.

An older view once commonly held was that one experience of adultery automatically destroyed the marriage. That position, fortunately, is no longer recognized as sound and it is important to recognize that a marriage which has been damaged by an adulterous experience can recover, and recover fully. If you face adultery your first responsibility will be to try seriously to heal the marriage, not to complete its destruction in the divorce court.

For many, a personal experience with an adulterous mate would come as a profound shock. The adjustments required would be difficult and real. The first essential, as with any problem, is to find out what the behavior means.

What if it is not a single slip, but a regularly established affair with someone else? Will you try to conceal this, or continue it with the knowledge of the other? What if you were threatened with divorce? Have you basically changed the moral standards to which you agreed at the time of marriage?

If so, has this fact been brought out into the open, and adjustments made in the light of the changed situation? Or was your adultery an expression of hostility, an act of aggression? If so, have you reviewed the whole situation between you to determine the reason for the hostility, and what should be done about the total relationship?

We hardly expect any couple to decide regarding all such possibilities in advance of their own marriage. You should know, however, what you might face with reference to a violation of the sex standards which you have agreed upon, and some possibilities as to both your attitude and what you will do about any such changes in your relationship.

Facing up to a few of the crises which may occur in marriage before they arise will guarantee that you can face them better equipped. A good start is considering how you would react to the above scenarios.

About the Author

Stop! Before You Marry, You Must Follow These Wedding Checklists.

Click Here For Free Online Ebook

http://www.weddingchecklists.net/

2008-02-16T18:38:00.001-08:00

Strategies To Save A Failing Marriage by Elliot Beers

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As marriages go through their ups and downs it is not always as easy to focus on the good times as it is the struggles. We develop expectations of our spouse over time and when we feel let down it typically stands out more than the positive aspects of our relationship. This becomes particularly true in failing marriages. As our daily interactions become more filled with conflict than agreement it can feel as though you are heading down the road to divorce.

The first step in salvaging a troubled marriage is to remind yourself what you are working towards. Take a mental inventory of the positives in your relationship, even if you do not experience them on a daily basis. You need to clearly define what it is about your spouse that made you fall in love in the beginning. When the going gets tough (which it will) you will be able to look back at these positives for inspiration.

Perhaps the toughest part of mending your relationship is confronting the issues. While it is easy to try and ignore you problems in hopes that they will go away, if you don't bring the issues out into the open then it will be difficult to attack them. You can begin this step by simply asking your spouse what changes they would like to see in your lives. Be sure to listen first and be open to their opinions.

Once the source of your problems has been identified, it is time to examine your options. Ask yourself if there are things you can do right now to change your situation. This might include some sacrifices on your part, and you may have to make some difficult decisions. The key is to be willing to act first so that you show your partner how serious you are about fixing things.

There are other important elements to a successful marriage beyond just solving conflict. Romance and passion often gets lost in the daily routine of work and maintaining a household. However, if you are going to save your failing marriage then you have to rebuild the natural attraction between you and your partner. This means coming up with creative ideas for bringing you closer together. Surprise dates, passionate surprises, and even vacations are a great way to reignite these feelings.

The final step in your resolving your differences involves being honest. It can be difficult to communicate with each other when tensions are high, but it is important to stay on the same page. Share your feelings and ideas with your partner through the healing process. Let them know how much they men to you and offer your goals for the future. Honesty is about being open and truthful, and this will help support the trust your spouse has in you.

Saving a failing marriage does take dedication and work, but if you truly love your partner then there is no reason it can't be achieved. By bringing your differences out into the open and making changes to your daily routine, you can effectively break down the barriers between you. If you always remember what you are working towards then the hard times will be much easier to deal with.

About the Author

Saving a troubled marriage involves dedication, strategy, and most importantly creativity. You can find all the advice and resources you need to resurrect your marriage at MendingMarriage.com

2008-02-16T18:33:00.001-08:00

Men, Is This Secretly Destroying Your Marriage or Relationship? by Calle Zorro

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There's a certain thing that is destroying marriages and relationships the world over - right now. Perhaps, it's silently working to tear down and destroy even your relationship...

I say silently because it's hidden. No one ever sees it. It's "covered up". In fact, it's covered so well that you'd think it didn't exist...and yet, buried though it may be, it's DRIVING power is persistently having a negative impact on far too many marriages and relationships.

It's a fear - a very specific fear...it is...the fear that your spouse somehow, someway finds you inadequate - that your spouse secretly wants something you can't give them but just doesn't say anything about it to you - or, that your spouse is unfulfilled in you, but doesn't want to tell you for fear of "hurting" you.

Baloney! Garbage! Rubbish! BS!

Friend, here's one of the greatest secrets to success in a marriage or relationship that you can ever grasp...whatever level of inadequacy that other people perceive in you ORIGINATES in YOUR mind.

In other words, if you secretly fear that you are inadequate, then your spouse will subconsciously pick up on that vibration and subconsciously reach the conclusion that you are somehow, someway inadequate.

Conversely, if you maintain a genuine, congruent self-belief that you are fully able and capable of meeting your spouses every need - physically and emotionally - then your spouse will subconsciously pick up on that vibration and WILL ACCEPT IT AS TRUE!

Regardless of your opinion about them, adult films offer us a very telling demonstration of what I'm talking about here... There are certain adult stars - male and female - who are endowed with (or who have surgically created) the finest specimen's of the human body.

Moreover, these adult stars have learned how to groom and oil and position their bodies in just the right way while making sure the lights are set in only complimentary angles such that by the time the "mere normal person" sees them on film, he or she can easily feel inferior, intimidated, and inadequate in comparison to these stars.

And yet, after watching several of these types of films in a row, you quickly begin to realize that in spite of all these adult stars physical features, you are watching a passionless, meaningless...

...FREAK SHOW!

Sure, they act like they're enjoying "over the top" passion ¬- but, you can tell that it's not real just as surely as you can tell when a toddler is telling you a false "story".

But, if you were to dig around long enough (and I'm not suggesting that you do, I'm just saying if you did) you would eventually find a film where a flat-chested woman and a man with a less-than-average-sized member set aside all the pretending, faking, judging, and evaluating (both of themselves and the other person) and simply focused on confidently giving and receiving as much pleasure as they possibly could.

On the woman's part, she let her SMALL breasts be a source of HUGE pleasure to both herself and to the man.

On the man's part, he let his SMALL member be a source of GIGANTIC pleasure to both himself and to the woman.

The result? Absolutely amazing, truly red-hot sex!

Do you realize...and can you accept...that the physical size or shape of certain body parts - whether on you or on another person - can NEVER give the same level of pleasure as a person who has a full-out, confident mental INTENTION to both give and receive maximum pleasure - regardless of how idyllic or non-idyllic certain body parts are sized or shaped?

Did you fully grasp that last paragraph? I hope so because it contains a key secret to abolishing this hidden fear of inadequacy that so many people suffer from.

In my above illustration, it was both the woman and the man's confident giving of their non-idyllic body parts - the surrendering of them - for the pleasure and enjoyment of both of them that created the real passion.

In thinking and believing that no matter what the size or shape, they could fully give and receive pleasure - they enjoyed exactly that.

And here's the thing...this giving and surrendering is something that any couple - any man and woman - can do.

Let's go a step further so you can really clear this up in your head and get things sorted out in a way that works for you...

It may be that your spouse has made statements or passing comments about certain physical sizes, shapes, or characteristics that you don't possess. If that's the case, here's what you need to realize...

Your spouse may have PREFERENCES for certain OPTIONS that you don't possess - just as you have preferences for certain options that your spouse may not possess.

Get this... There's a HUGE difference between a PREFERENCE and a REQUIREMENT!

If it was a requirement, your spouse would have either laid that out at the beginning of the relationship or would have never even pursued a relationship with you in the first place.

A preference for a certain size, shape, color, or whatever is just that - a preference. And preferences are optional! If you don't have it, well, no big deal, it was just optional anyway.

So, realizing this, just RELAX! Let go of all your fears of inadequacy.

What's important...what you want to really pay attention to...what you want to focus on are those things that are NOT optional...those things that really are requirements - the giving and receiving of mutual love, respect, appreciation and regular intimacy.

Now, I want to go back and revisit a word I used previously - COMPARISON...

There has never been a game more designed for you to LOSE than the game of comparing one's self to others.

It's such a losing game because when a person compares and then self-judge's themselves as somehow "less" than others, they WITHDRAW or WITHHOLD.

And, in the process of withdrawing and withholding, they block every chance of having the happiness and fulfillment in life they desire. They BLOCK THEMSELVES!

Every time!

Withdrawing and withholding has never served to make anyone happy - ever!

The fact is, there will ALWAYS be someone who has a better shape, size, or characteristic than you. There will ALWAYS be someone who has something you don't have.

So what?

Who cares?

The way for YOU to stop losing and start winning - in every area of your life, especially in relationships - is to confidently step out, to be more forward, and to start giving of yourself - regardless!

Again, the fear of inadequacy is a SELF-ORIGINATING thought. The antidote is SELF-APPROVAL and SELF-ACCEPTANCE.

Don't look for your worth in the external world. Don't look to other people for approval.

Beating yourself up by comparing yourself to others makes for a hard, painful, unhappy life.

Withholding and withdrawing yourself because you wonder if your spouse views you as inadequate is a sure way to destroy any and all good that happens to remain in your relationship - that you haven't already destroyed.

Realize this...you are an important, talented, and special person. Let that sink in because it's TRUE. You are completely unique.

Some things you're better at then others, some you're not.

Big deal!

There's no need for unnecessary comparison.

Just be the best YOU that you can be.

Sure, develop and grow in those areas where you can. But while you're developing and growing, always, always, ALWAYS be giving of what you have RIGHT NOW so that you can enjoy life to the fullest RIGHT NOW.

And, in the occasional case where the other person continually chooses to reject what you're offering and giving...THAT'S OK! It's ok because that person is just clearing themselves out of the way so that another person - one who wants to appreciate and enjoy what you're offering and giving - can come into your life.

www.MarriedAndHappy.com - the website devoted to helping men create a more sexual, intimate, happy, and fulfilling marriage. Visit for more free articles and recommended resources.

Copyright 2008, Article by Calle Zorro, www.MarriedAndHappy.com

About the Author

www.MarriedAndHappy.com - the website devoted to helping men create a more sexual, intimate, happy, and fulfilling marriage. Visit for more free articles and recommended resources. www.MarriedAndHappy.com

2008-02-16T18:29:00.001-08:00

Finding Marriage Help With A Resistant Spouse by Elliot Beers

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When marriages begin to face problems there are usually two different sides to the situation. There is the facilitator, who still proclaims their love for their partner and is willing to do anything to correct the issues. The other side is typically a withdrawn and apathetic individual who is not so sure that the relationship is worth salvaging. This combination of opposites makes it difficult to find a resolution that both sides will accept. However, if you are willing to take on the difficult road of the facilitator, then there are ways to save your marriage without the help of your spouse.

Expose the Problems

It can be hard to discuss the problems in your relationship with someone who is not communicating well with you. It is tempting to avoid conflict and hope that things will work out as time goes on. Unfortunately, waiting for a miracle solution is a huge gamble, and you risk watching things get worse. No matter how uncomfortable it may be to approach your spouse, it is necessary to get all of your problems out in the open. You need to know exactly why things aren't going well so you can work on finding a resolution. Don't be afraid to bring the topic up in conversation, just be sure to listen closely to their take on things.

Lead by Example

Even if you don't find yourself at fault for the troubles you and your partner are experiencing, the best way to break down the barriers of communication is by being the first to make sacrifices. By exposing your own faults first, you will give them an opportunity to not only voice their opinion, but it may also open the door for them to admit their own shortcomings. We all know a couple of aspects about our personal routine that irritates our spouse. Show them you are serious about fixing your marriage by offering to make your own changes. In some cases this is all you need to begin clearing the air.

Ask the Experts

If your spouse is particularly withdrawn or resistant to suggestion, then you may have to look outside of your relationship for the answers. The internet is filled with advice on overcoming marriage problems, and some experts have written guides for breaking through to a distant partner. Since it is unlikely that a resistant spouse would go outside the home for marriage counseling, the next best things is to bring the expertise inside the home. By researching the ways that counselors help troubled couples, you can use these techniques to get past the first few difficult steps to opening up dialogue about your problems. The best part is that you can do this behind the scenes without anyone else knowing.

It can be hard to find marriage helps when you are barely communicating with your partner. While the temptation may be to hide from your problems, the better solution is to take action. Focus on finding out exactly what has come between your love, and offer some recourse to improve the situation. It is also important to educate yourself on all of the available solutions by reading the advice of experts. Ultimately, if your love is true and you remain persistent, then you will eventually find the key to saving your marriage.

About the Author

What are you doing to save your marriage? Start taking action today with the strategies and resources at MendingMarriage.com

2008-02-03T18:07:00.000-08:00

Tips For A Successful Marriage
By: Roberto Bell

Successful marriage tips really can make the difference in a marriage. Sometimes they may seem a little obvious or trite, but you'll usually find that simple solutions are the best ones. If you are looking for successful marriage tips to help your relationship, check out the rest of this article.

Successful Marriage Tip 1
Forget the rules-every relationship is different, and so will require different ways of making it work and communicating between partners. Find what works for you. The key to longstanding love and happiness is communication, so the more you strive to develop yours, the stronger your relationship will be.

Successful Marriage Tip 2
Find activities you both enjoy, and do them together. Many marriages start to fracture due to both partners not feeling like they have any common ground. If you find something to actively participate in and enjoy together, you'll find that other areas of your relationship are improved as a result.

Successful Marriage Tip 3
Don't gloat. It's surprising how often “I told you so” becomes a part of everyday language for some married couples. Think of it this way though-what possible good can come from you saying that to your partner? If something goes wrong, support your partner. At no point is it a positive point for you to tell them they were wrong and you were right.

Successful Marriage Tip 4
Listen to your partner. It's a bit of a cliché that men don't listen when their wives speak to them, but as with most cliches there can be a grain of truth there. If you give your partner your undivided attention, you are showing them that you respect them and their opinions. You may also find that they are more receptive when you have something to say too...

Successful Marriage Tip 5
Marriage isn't a job, so there is no need to make sure your partner is carrying their weight in certain things. Noone appointed you as foreman or forewoman, so relax and let your partner get on with their life while you get on with yours. Your home will be a much more relaxed place if you follow this.

Hopefully these successful marriage tips will be of some use for you. Check out the links below for some great information on saving your marriage.

Article Source: http://www.superfeature.com

2008-02-03T04:02:00.001-08:00

Advice For A Happy Marriage by Jennifer Tooley

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Some people may think that advice for a happy marriage can be a bit obvious, but if that's the case why are there so many unhappy marriages? It can be very hard to focus on the big picture when you are on the inside of a long term relationship, so hopefully these tips can rejuvenate your marriage.

Advice for a happy marriage 1- Communicate. A marriage is nothing without communication-and that doesn't mean arguing and snapping at each other all the time-that's not real communication. Communication means switching the TV off for once and sitting down and talking over your day, or letting your partner know in a direct way when there is a problem. A marriage is rarely harmed by some good direct communication.

Advice for a happy marriage 2- Admit when things are wrong. During a serious relationship it can be very easy to let yourself gloss over things and make believe that everything will be okay. In truth though, if you do this you aren't being true to yourself, your partner, or your marriage. Problems in marriages are like snowballs rolling down a hill-it's easier to stop them early. Again, the easiest way to do this when a problem does arise is by simple communication between you both.

Advice for a happy marriage 3- Know the difference between falling in love and maintaining a loving relationship. Falling in love can often be like being intoxicated, the subject of your love can do no wrong and all different areas of your brain are impaired due to your preoccupation with them. Unfortunately, this state rarely lasts past the first few years of marriage, so in many cases it's necessary to work together at maintaining a healthy and loving relationship.

Advice for a happy marriage 4- Put a little karmic theory into your marriage-you get what you give, so if you do everything you can to make your partner happy, the chances are they will step up their efforts to make you happy. The more effort you expend making your partner understand how much they mean to you, the more likely it is for them to reciprocate.

Advice for a happy marriage 5- Learn that mending a relationship doesn't mean mending your partner. A marriage includes you both, and so any issues or situations always include both of you. You can't fix things by modifying the behaviour of one person, it has to be a team effort. People aren't like animals, and you shouldn't have to "marriage train" your partner into making you happy. It's not fair on them, and it's not fair on you.

This advice for a good marriage can really help in the tough times, so I hope it helps you if you need it. Check out the links below for great info on fixing your marriage.

About the Author

Marriage Advice
Help Your Marriage
http://www.marriageadvicereview.com!

2008-02-03T02:00:00.001-08:00

5 Simple Strategies To Save Your Marriage by Lanie Dills

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1. When you think your marriage is going on the blink, SLOW DOWN! Take some time off, maybe a couple of days and focus on what is good in your life. Stand back from the agony of the infidelity or extramarital affair or whatever. When you are immersed in your misery, it's hard to even imagine that life will once again be better.

2. Focus on the parts of your life that give you joy. Visualize and feel yourself moving slowly while happily enjoying the activities of your day that make you smile. This important exercise will help you avoid the impulsive, frantic, flailing and "failing" painful strategies that are only attempts to alleviate the pain of losing him or her. Even though you might not think so right now, there is much more to your life than this current situation.

3. Remember all the good things in your marriage. Start with remembering how you first met, your first date, your first kiss, the butterflies in your stomach. Remember how much you love his or her sense of humor. All of the wonderful feelings can and will come back with a little work.

4. If you can't afford a marriage counselor, get yourself a save my marriage book. These resources have helped save thousands of marriages. After all who knows your marriage better than you. Marriage Counselors are highly paid listeners who you are paying to listen to your marital problems. Get yourself a good save my marriage book and become your own expert. You will save yourself a lot of time, money and energy and you will develop the skills to make your marriage work better than before.

5. Remember who you are. You are worthy and you are important. You are a great gift to this world and to all who know you. Also, remember, "This Too Will Pass".

About the Author

Lanie Dills Ways To Save Marriage

2008-02-01T01:24:00.001-08:00

How To Save A Broken Marriage by Elliot Beers

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With everything in our world becoming more associated with quick fixes, people involved with troubled marriages have become too fast to pull the divorce trigger. It seems that most people are willing to sacrifice their marriage instead of trying to find ways to fix the actual problems. But there are some relatively simple strategies you can take to begin the healing process in a broken marriage. Here are the basis steps to get you started.

Identify the Problem

Before you can begin to successfully treat the problems in your relationship you will have to identify exactly what they are. This goes much deeper than broad statements like "he won't listen to me". What you need to do is get to the absolute root of the issue. Why doesn't he listen to you? Is it the way you speak to him or is it the request you are making? By focusing on determining exactly what is causing the various conflicts in your relationship you will understand the steps it will take to resolve them.

Expose the Issues

Once you have a good idea of what is holding your marriage back, it is then time to bring these issues to the surface. This means sharing with your spouse the things that are upsetting you while at the same time offering them a chance to share their thoughts in return. This can be difficult to do, especially if you have a spouse that is reluctant to share their feelings.

In situations where there is significant resistance you will have to become more creative in your approach to the discussing the conflicts. For example, instead of surprising them with a list of your concerns at the dinner table, work the topics into your conversations at a time when there aren't any distractions. Don't begin with your issues first, but rather warm things up by asking them what they would change about your marriage. Once the topic is started you can slowly add your opinions to the discussion.

Making Sacrifices

After everyone has had a chance to say their peace, it is time to move on to solving the conflict. If your spouse is particularly hard to negotiate with, then you will likely have to be the first one to sacrifice something. Show that them you are serious about making changes by being more flexible with their needs. It may even require you to give back on more than one level in order to trigger a reciprocal action from them. The key is to understand that nothing will ever change unless changes are made, and the easiest way to begin is by being the first to take action.

There are simple steps you take to begin the process of saving a broken marriage. For starters, you need to identify exactly what has created the barrier between you and your spouse. From there you can work on the problems by brining them to the forefront and discussing what each side expects from your relationship. Understand that it may take sacrifices from both sides, but you can make the process go faster by being the first to offer some flexibility. Ultimately, you will improve your relationship by discovering what you need to add to it.

About the Author

You don't have to wait for a miracle to save your broken marriage. MendingMarriage.com offers proven strategies to reignite the love that brought you and your spouse together

2008-01-28T02:33:00.001-08:00

Help Save My Marriage; A Place To Start by Rex Freiberger

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The rate of divorce in America is at the highest point it has ever been. Trying to figure out how to save your marriage is hard because each marriage is completely different. You can look to books, classes, support groups, counselors, or even television shows for advice on how to stay together.

Most people will agree that the most difficult and hardest divorces are those in which children are involved. Divorce increases the numbers of single parent families and, as it is more difficult to support children when incomes are divided, the numbers of children living in or near poverty is on the rise also. This doesn't even begin to talk about the social and emotional problems that children are faced with as a result of divorcing parents. Children are also the number one reason that couples ask "Please, help save my marriage".

Various authors have tackled the 'Help save my marriage.' pleas that they have received from their followers. Phil McGraw, James Dobson, and Laura Schlessinger are just a few of the many who have written books and made shows that some people will attest have saved their marriages.

Divorce, the myths and reasons keep couples at risk. Surely, if one thinks for a moment, the adage that one simply "falls into" or "out of love" doesn't quite measure up to the reasons why some relationships last and indeed thrive, while others disintegrate into a toxic place of rage and abandonment. Until those that adhere to the old myths are made aware of their inaccurate simplicity, the helplessness of having control and managing relationships will forever be unattainable. Within this new found understanding of love, couples will then be able to step out of themselves and this floundering about to a space of compassion, of serving the other, serving the relationship.

Those couples who are on the verge of divorce should pause to think that the problem in the relationship is not always with the other person. Coples might be disappointed for not having their requirements fulfilled or have not spoken about it to their spouse. If a person needs anything from the marriage, communication regarding the need should be made clearly and without being angry.

Those attempting to "help save my marriage" need to remember that trying to help save marriage is very hard work. It takes a lot of effort and time and results are not immediate. Couples who are willing to try can do it, however. If two people really desire to stay in the marriage and will do what is necessary to heal their union, the marriage can be saved. It often becomes even stronger than ever and the partners are much happier.

About the Author

With divorce rates on the rise, more people are asking themselves, "How do I save my marriage?" There are many resources and options available to those who want to know how to help save my marriage.

2008-01-26T02:20:00.000-08:00

Intercaste Marriages
By: megrisoft
Marriages are made in heaven. This is a well known saying. When two people meet and their marriage is solemnized, it is believed that this is the wish of god.

Marriage may be in the same caste or it may be inter caste. Marriages within the same caste mean that both boy and the girl belong to the same community. Intercaste marriage means girl and boy are from different castes where one member belongs to lower caste.

Marriage is a sacred institution which binds both the woman and man in a pious relation. It gives this relation a meaning. When a marriage takes place, two souls are united and this opens new vistas in their lives. But, human beings are so selfish that have virtually spoilt the sacredness of these relations.

When God created men and women, he has not assigned any caste on them. So,how can the human beings divide God's created world into castes and communities.

The things do not end up here. From the time of Kings and Queens, caste system has been practiced. In earlier days, it was customary to marry in the same castes. If anyone dares to disobey the rules of the society, he
was confined to severe punishments. Whole community was barred from keeping any relation with the family where inter caste marriage had taken place.

Customs and religions practiced were so strict and merciless that even sometimes the boy and girl were hacked to death by their own family members due to the pressures from the society.

Sometimes young hearts were separated by marrying them off to other boy or girl of the same caste. This way the lovers were separated by their own relatives. There are lots of such incidents where you can find the
merciless punishments inflicted by the opposition parties of the intercaste marriages.

With more globalization and increase in educational facilities, there is great change in the views of people. As modernization has affected every section of society, intercaste marriages have also received acceptance from the people in urban and modern societies. There has been wide change in the social scenario. Parents and relatives of the lovers have been coming up with more open minds with wide acceptance of marriages outside their own castes.

But in some regions which lack exposure to the education and modern society culture, things have remained unchanged. There are still oppositions by the members of different castes if they encounter any incident of intercaste marriage. These societies need some change of views so that young hearts could unite and live happily. A good relation needs understanding and devotion from boy and girl to blossom. If there are malpractices like caste system, then there will be unhealthy marital relations which increase the rate of divorces and mutual misunderstandings.

Government should come forward to make such policies and rules which can encourage marriage between the members of two different castes. There should be some type of appreciation from the government so that more
intercaste marriages can take place. Though government has taken many steps to improve the situation but still there is a great need to implement more measures to make the situation happier.

About the Author
The Article is written by IndiaBook.Com providing Free Indian Matrimonial Services. IndiaBook is portal on india and Indian People.

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Article Source: http://articlecrazy.com

Copyright information.... This article is free for reproduction but must be reproduced in its entirety, including live links & this copyright statement must be included. Visit Indian Portal for more information and guide on India.

2008-01-24T02:07:00.001-08:00

Can My Marriage Be Saved - Yes! - Tips To Help You Save Your Marriage by Amanda Barnes

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The answer to this question is overwhelmingly Yes, your marriage can be saved! Please do not give up. There are very few instances where a marriage truly has to end in divorce. If you are asking this question then you've come to a point in your marriage where you may be feeling desperate for affection, sad, lonely or depressed. You are not alone, in fact I was there myself a couple of years ago. Knowing you are not alone probably doesn't make you feel any better, but most all marriages have ups and downs.

I love metaphors, I use them a lot when I'm teaching because it makes you look at your situation in a different way. Think of the stock market. Depending on your age you can probably remember when the market has totally tanked. A good example was in the 90's during the dot.com crash. Historically after every stock market crash and I mean every single one, the market always comes back higher than it was previously was (look at Google, Amazon, Ebay, etc.) Now this doesn't happen overnight but my point is that if you ride it out and keep working on it you will save your marriage and it will be even stronger than it was before.

One of the most common problems in a marriage is communication. Life gets busy with work, kids, finances, etc. and gets in the way of relationships. Before you know it meaningful conversations, sex, or just being together without getting impatient or frustrated are virtually non-existent. If this sounds like where you are sitting right now, then the first thing to work on is communication. Meaningful communication will save your marriage. "How do I communicate with my spouse" Consider seeing a marriage counselor.

Talking with a marriage counselor is not a sign of weakness and is not embarrassing. It means that you want to improve your situation. Counseling, just like my metaphor above, allows a professional to look at your marriage in a different way and try to improve your communication. If you and your partner do this, you will be taking a huge step in reinvigorating your marriage.

The fact that you are reading this article means that you are want your marriage to work. Whatever you do just do not give up. It can get better, I am living proof. If you stick it out and keep working on it, you can save your marriage today.

If you are tired of feeling depressed and lonely and long for the affection of your spouse again, then please take the next step and learn what you need to do to save your marriage today Your relationship is too important and you have worked too hard to just walk away from it.

Please check out SaveMyMarriageToday.com This book opened up my eyes and was instrumental in turning my marriage around.

EzineArticles.com - Can My Marriage Be Saved

About the Author

Amanda Barnes

2008-01-22T02:43:00.001-08:00

Arranged Marriage - Finding A Suitable Partner by James Gunaseelan

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Marriage is an interpersonal relationship with governmental, social, or religious recognition, usually intimate and sexual, and often created as a contract, or through civil process. Civil marriage is the legal concept of marriage. The most common form of marriage unites a man and a woman as husband and wife. Other forms of marriage also exist; for example, polygamy, in which a person takes more than one spouse (marriage partner), is common in many societies.Beginning in 2001, civil marriage in some places has been expanded to include same-sex marriage.

The reasons people marry vary, but usually include one or more of the following: legal, social and economic stability; the formation of a family unit; procreation and the education and nurturing of children; legitimizing sexual relations; public declaration of love. A marriage is often declared by a wedding ceremony,which may be performed by a religious officiator, through a similar government-sanctioned secular officiator, or (in weddings that have no church or state affiliation) by a trusted friend of the wedding participants. The act of marriage usually creates obligations between the individuals involved, and in many societies, their extended families.

In order to get married, it is necessary to find a suitable partner. A partner may be found by the person wishing to be married via a process of courtship. Alternately, two marriage-able people may be matched by a third party, typically with the match finalized only if both candidates approve the union. This is known as an arranged marriage.

The choice between courtship and arranged marriage is made by the person seeking marriage or by his or her parents. In some cases, the parents will be ready to force an arranged marriage because of cultural tradition (e.g., in the Middle East) or for some other special reason (e.g., dowry). It is worth noting, however, that in many cases the person seeking marriage is comfortable with having his or her marriage arranged and, even disregarding parental preference, would freely choose an arranged marriage. Actual forced marriage is common in only a few communities and often attracts harsh criticism even from people who are generally in favor of arranged marriage.

Given a choice, the preference for the method of courtship or arranged marriage is determined by whether a person believes that marriage should be based on emotion or logic. At one end of the scale is a person who believes that there is only one unique "soul mate" suitable for them. A partner is typically chosen based on the depth of emotional connection experienced with their partner during the courtship phase of the relationship. At the other end of the scale is a person who believes that there are many suitable partners, and typically views marriage chiefly as a means to start a family. The deep emotional bond between partners characteristic of good marriages is more likely to be viewed as something which can be developed through nurture and cultivation with any suitable partner. Most people fall somewhere between these two extremes. Rights and obligations.

About the Author

James Gunaseelan writes for Leading matrimonial portal for Brahmins brides and grooms.

2008-01-19T00:58:00.001-08:00

Are You Looking For Ways To Save A Marriage On Your Own? by Addison Barnesworth

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While there are many ways to repair a marriage in trouble, most of them require participation from both partners, and finding ways to save a marriage all on your own is a rather difficult task.

Most marriage counselors will tell you that, as marriage is a partnership, it is essential for both partners to work together to solve problems and strengthen the relationship. So what are you supposed to do when your partner gives up and refuses to work with you? If marriage is a team effort, and the other half of your team walks off the field, does your marriage simply end in a forfeit, or divorce?

Fortunately, it is possible for a marriage to be saved with the efforts of just one partner. It certainly isn't easy, but if a person is truly determined, they can find ways to save a marriage that they will be able to implement on their own. But keep in mind that every marriage is unique, and methods that work for one couple may not work for another.

Sometimes a person decides that they want a divorce, and there is absolutely nothing their spouse can do to change their mind. This often happens when there has been an unforgivable betrayal of trust, infidelity or abuse. Or when one spouse has fallen in love with someone else and wants their freedom in order to begin a new life. There are really no effective ways to repair a marriage in trouble like this.

Luckily, there are occasions when the problems in a marriage are such that it is indeed possible for one spouse to successfully work alone towards salvaging their marriage. Sometimes a spouse refuses to work on their marriage not because they want a divorce, but because they are overwhelmed by frustrated and feel helpless.

If you believe that there is hope for your marriage, then you need to first figure out what is going on with your spouse. In order to determine which ways to save a marriage will be most effective for you, it is critical that you understand what your spouse is upset about and why they have given up.

Sit down together and talk about your relationship, agreeing beforehand that it will be an information session, not a blame session. There should be no accusations or recriminations, only a civilized exchange of information. It might also be helpful for both of you to do a little preparation beforehand by making a list of the issues that you want to discuss.

Whatever you do, don't give up. If you've made mistakes, overcome them. If you've ignored problems, work towards solving them. There are many ways to save a marriage, but the first step is to take some initiative and start a dialogue with your spouse today.

About the Author

Don't worry! There are ways to save a marriage that really do work. Visit ways to save a marriage right now to find out more and get your free copy of the amazing Save My Marriage Today 6 Day e-Course!

2008-01-17T02:49:00.001-08:00

Save Your Marriage from #1 Killer by Michael E Dixon

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Why are so many couples bored, unhappy, unsatisfied, separated or getting divorced? It's not because of a lack of DESIRE. Everyone who gets married DESIRES to be happy and "live happily ever after". So what's the problem? What's killing our relationships?

The #1 Killer of marriages is a Lack of Knowledge: not extra-marital affairs, or arguments or a lack of money; these are only symptoms of the disease. What's killing our marriages is ignorance. We don't know how to relate! Too many couples today are not equipped with the relational knowledge and skills they must have in order to navigate safely through marital storms. In fact, when a leading scholar was asked, "what is the greatest problem in marriages today?" He responded, "The greatest problem is that couples believe there are not supposed to be any problems."

When most of us think about "success" we usually only think of money, however, financial success is only one area in which we can be successful. Many people are financially successful but unsuccessful in marriage. I'm sure you can think of a few. Others may be successful spiritually, physically or professionally, but still fail relationally. DESIRE is not enough to get you success. The key to success is APPLIED KNOWLEDGE. You must acquire sufficient knowledge and then execute that knowledge in order to succeed in any area. I really want you to have a successful marriage however, success in any field mandates applying the appropriate knowledge to anticipate and overcome problems. The best way to get the knowledge you need and become successful is to get a proven coach, mentor or teacher. Everyone can benefit from a coach is some area of life. So, let me be your marriage coach for today. I have the best marriage I know of, and I want you to be able to say the same!!

Let's start with ATTITUDE. What's your idea about marriage? How do you view your spouse? Is your wife your "old ball and chain" or is your husband your "drill sergeant"? Do you see marriage as a life long commitment or as a contract you can get out of whenever trouble comes?

A very wise king once said: "Live joyfully with your wife...because this is your portion in this life." In other words, the first attitude you must have regarding your marriage is this: "My marriage is the most important physical relationship I can have." Not your relationship with your children, your parents, your friends, your cat, your dog, your broker or your business partner. In your mind, you have to choose to make your marriage the most important relationship you have. That's the foundational mindset behind every couple that has a passionately successful marriage. So that's where we must start, and after that decision is made, everything else becomes much easier to learn.

If this hasn't been the case with your spouse, make a decision right now to make your marriage the most important relationship in your life. Initially, your friends or family may feel slighted or pushed aside, but eventually your life will be much better all around. Your children will love you for it, your friends and family will respect you for it, and your spouse will admire and adore you for it! Make the decision now and then you will be on your way to learning the secrets to lasting love in marriage.

Mike lives near Cherry Hill, NJ with his wife of seventeen years, Tami, and their three children. He is a marriage coach and speaker. Click Help Marriage Now if you want more marriage secrets that are guaranteed to empower you to have a successful marriage.

www.ILoveBeingMarried.com

About the Author

Michael E. Dixon lives near Cherry Hill, NJ with his wife of seventeen years, Tami, and their three children. He is a marriage coach and speaker. Click Help Marriage Now if you want more marriage secrets that are guaranteed to empower you to have a successful marriage.

2008-01-01T05:37:00.001-08:00

Honest Ways To Save Your Marriage Even If Your Spouse Cheated
By: Brandon Hong

So your spouse has cheated, and you are wondering what to do now? If you are interested in trying to work things out, saving a marriage after affair is possible. It has been done many times before, and can happen in your life with some work.

Here are some methods to save and salvage a marriage after an affair:

a) Seek therapy.
Saving a marriage after affair entails a lot of communication, a lot of delving into past situations and relational patterns that resulted in the affair to begin with. To save a marriage an after affair can mean months or even years of regular therapy with a professional marriage counselor, and it should be undertaken by both you and your spouse, together.

b) Make a committment to each other.
Consider your commitment to the work and to each other. Saving a marriage after affair means that both spouses will need to make a permanent, serious decision that they want to stay together, and that they are willing to do the work it takes. To save a marriage after affair is not easy, and can try even the strongest persons' sense of self and emotions. If one or both of your are not totally willing to do the work it takes to stay together, you will likely not succeed in saving a marriage after affair.

c) Rebuild the relationship. After an affair, the relationship is probably pretty much destroyed and possibly hanging on only by a thread. When saving a marriage after affair, it is important to make big changes right now to forge a path toward each other again. Apologies can help, but when it comes to really saving a marriage after an affair, they won't repair the damage that has been done. But seeing some remorse on the part of the cheating spouse can be a first step to real healing down the road.

d) Avoid blame and disrespect. If your spouse has cheated, it is natural to feel anger and sadness, and there will be times when your sense of blame is on High. In the end, though, to genuinely save a marriage after an affair requires the willingness of both spouses to take a step back from blame, retribution, revenge, and guilt trips. The first priority in saving a marriage after your spouse has cheated or had any affair should be to build a path back to each other, where mutual respect and love can be found again. No one said this part is easy, but if saving a marriage after an affair is your aim, it's a necessary part of the journey.

e) Spend time with each other.
To save a marriage after affair isn't a process that can be quickly taken care of in a couple weeks. It will take a lot of time and effort, and hours and hours of talking and listening to each other. There will be rough spots through the process, but if saving a marriage after affair is truly your desire, you can and will find success towards that goal.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:

Put an End to the Stress and Anxiety of Not Knowing What to Do to Save Your Troubled Marriage! Get proven marriage tips and advice today. www.ways-to-save-a-marriage.info

Article Source: http://www.article-directorysite.com

2007-12-29T15:46:00.001-08:00

One Of The Best Ways To Save A Marriage Is To Build A Happy One by Addison Barnesworth

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It's amazing that with all of the many ways to save a marriage available to couples today, more marriages fail than succeed. Perhaps the problem is that instead of taking the time to build a solid foundation for a healthy marriage, they ignore it, and then scramble for ways to save a marriage after it is already in serious trouble.

You are no doubt familiar with the old saying "you reap what you sow." Well, that applies to marriage as much as it does anything else. If you work hard at strengthening your marriage now, you won't have to struggle to fix it in the future.

Communication, consideration and confirmation are the cornerstones of a happy, healthy marriage. In marriage, an individual's spouse should be the one person they can always confide in, the one that always makes them feel loved unconditionally, and the one that they can count on no matter what. If you are trying to save your marriage at all costs, then this is type of relationship you need to cultivate.

You simply cannot have a successful relationship without communication, and a marriage without communication is a divorce in the making. You must communicate honestly and openly with your significant other if you want to have a happy and healthy relationship. A marriage that has secrets and silence is doomed to fail because all ways to save a marriage depend on communication between spouses.

Many times a couple's inability to communicate effectively with each other is the result of a lack of consideration for each other. Sadly, many people treat the people they work with (and can't stand) better than they treat the people they are married to (and love). If you are guilty of not providing your spouse with the consideration they need and deserve, then start being more considerate of their feelings and show them that their opinions do matter to you. Remember, while there are many ways to save a marriage, none of them can work without consideration.

Last but not least is confirmation. Confirmation is so important in a marriage because people need to feel special and loved, and it's your job to make your spouse feel that way. Tell them that they are attractive, that you love them, and that you would marry them again tomorrow. Confirming your feelings to your spouse on a daily basis will boost your partner's self-esteem and strengthen your marriage.

For those of you searching for ways to save your marriage at all costs, then make a commitment to incorporate communication, consideration and confirmation into your marriage. And don't forget, the key here is consistency, so these things should become daily habits.

Marriage isn't easy, it's hard work. But if you are looking for ways to save your marriage, do yourself a favor and start building a happy marriage today today.

About the Author

Don't worry! There are ways to save a marriage that really do work. Visit ways to save a marriage right now to discover more and get your copy of the amazing Save My Marriage Today 6 Day e-Course for FREE!

2007-12-26T01:46:00.001-08:00

The Most Important Marriage Tips Of All Marriage Tips by Shevach Pepper

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Recently my father-in-law spoke at a wedding I attended. After 50 years of wedded bliss he offered the couple simple marriage tips. He told them simply that one of the most important the rich tips they will ever get in life is not to be afraid to say, "I'm sorry". He claims that this one marriage and tip can bring you many happy years as a married couple.

These simple, short words can work wonders when it comes to an intimate relationship. Only moments before these words slip from your lips you may have been in hot water. Now that you have apologized the mood in the room is changed to a lighter, happier and more loving feeling to move forward with. Facial muscles are relaxed and your spouse will forgive you.

You might think this sounds easy but there is a lot of difference in how men and women view these two words. Women find apologizing easier than most men. Men find it hard to say and don't always see how important it is.

Often this causes problems. While men may think that women wanting to hear these words are needy and dependent this is often not the case. Women often tend to feel that if a man doesn't say these words then he doesn't mean them, which is also usually not the case. Being able to look at both sides of the issue and seeing where your partner was coming from is one of the most important ways to prevent problems from happening in marriages. Occasionally men need to swallow their pride and say with their woman needs to hear and on the other side of the token women need to occasionally realize that just because their man doesn't say how he feels does not mean that doesn't have feelings.

As it is a most tips, this tip does no good to merely understand. It is important to put this marriage tip into practice.

As it is a most tips, this marriage to does no good to merely understand. It is important to also put this marriage tip into practice.

If you mess up, take full responsibility. Don't make your spouse a party to what happened. If you say, "sorry I spilt wine on the rug but don't fill my glass so full next time", this is a half-hearted apology along with a dig at your partner. "I'm sorry I spilt wine on the rug" is a better apology and should get immediate forgiveness (we all have little accidents!)

Apologize for how you made the other person feel as well as apologizing for what happened. "I'm sorry I came home so late. I know you must have been worried", is a better way of saying sorry than, "I'm sorry I came home so late," which makes it sound like you are only saying sorry because you are expected to.

Be specific when making an apology. "Sorry for all the times I upset you," is too generalized and sounds like a politician trying to cover everything. This is also called a "non-apology apology". If there is something you want to apologize for, name it.

Timing means everything. His small mistake deserves an immediate apology. Larger mistakes that are going to take a little bit more time, thought and energy, these apologies need to be well thought out and shouldn't be spur of the moment. Once you've given some thought, then it's time for you to approach your partner with a sincere apology this should be done when you've got a 100% of your partner's attention.

Explanations do not require you to hand out to blame. Marriage tips can be helpful but you should not expect them to work miracles. It is up to you and your spouse to work through your problems. You shouldn't expect your spouse to instantaneously accept your apology either. Forgiveness may take awhile and in the meantime that you self and your partner shoes. Do not pass the blame to partner. An explanation does not require that someone is to blame.

Marriage tips are helpful but seldom work miracles. You cannot expect your spouse to accept every apology immediately. If you have upset them a great deal, forgiveness takes time. State how sorry you are about what you did and wait for it to work. You will both be glad of the results.

About the Author

Click for marriage tips, valuable insights and important tips on married life and family relationships.

2007-12-24T01:05:00.001-08:00

Improve Your Marriage - How to Spice Up Your Married Life by Michael Lee

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Improve your marriage by fostering a better relationship with your partner. This alone might tell you that it takes some effort as well as time to improve your marriage. After all, marriage is a lifelong contract and making it work means nurturing and keeping the relationship between the husband and wife always alive and well.

Making a marriage last takes more than just love alone. Other factors also come into play when it comes to making marriage count. Communication is just one important factor that can help improve your marriage. Keeping the communication lines always open is important for married couples so that they can express what they really feel. And it is not just communicating by expressing what you feel.

In trying to improve your marriage, you also need to have a good ear to listen to your partner. And in the same manner, your partner should learn to listen to you. It is all a matter of give and take. That is what effective communication is all about.

Another tip to improve your relationship with your better half is by trying to keep the fire of intimacy burning. Having a great deal of intimacy in a relationship is an indication that the attraction and love is still there. On the other hand, if intimacy has diminished a great deal, it is a sign of an impending failure in the relationship.

When you wish to improve your marriage, you also have to find time to spend with each other. What would become of any relationship if partners don't see eye to eye? Although absence may make the heart grow fonder at times, prolonged absence may also be a surefire way of making the heart lose interest in the relationship. Make it a point to enjoy and spend time with each other's company.

Another important ingredient to a good marriage is humor. This may sound funny (pardon the pun) but humor can really help a marriage. Laughter can easily help break the ice. Cracking a joke can also help calm a volatile situation. If you know how to share a laugh with your better half, then you know that you can get through anything.

If you want your marriage to last, you have to place it on top of your priorities. You must learn to put it above anything else in your life. It takes effort on your part to improve your marriage. It may seem hard. But it is all worth it.

About the Author

Discover the most life-changing insider secrets to unleash instant persuasion power and influence over anyone... guaranteed! If you want to be an expert persuader the fast and easy way, then go to http://www.20daypersuasion.com now!

2007-12-21T00:55:00.001-08:00

Wedding Etiquette For a Second Marriage by Megan Johnson

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What if your heart beats again for the second time? Scary, isn't it? Many questions pop-up your mind especially now that he proposed marriage to you. The first question that your mind have formed was what is the wedding etiquette for a second marriage?

It is a tough question but it needs to be answered. Learning the wedding etiquette for a second marriage will help you lessen the pressure and tension that your first family (which you love so much) have unconsciously thrown at your back. You need to carry the situation like any sensible adult.

Before, it is a popular thought that second marriage should not be elaborate, extravagant and formal the way a first marriage is celebrated. But today, this belief does not hold true anymore. You can still aim for an intimate, smaller and quieter second marriage but you can also celebrate a festive one, if you prefer and your budget allows you to do so.

What is important is that your second marriage is celebrated the way you would want it to be. Don't limit yourself and do what others expect you to do for a second marriage. Remember, it is you who will get wed and not them. Besides, you would not violate any wedding etiquette by following your heart's desires.

Here are some information for you on wedding etiquette for a second marriage.

-- Wedding Etiquette for a Second Marriage - Announcing Your Engagement

In getting wed for the second time, your major concerns will be the second marriage's effect on your children, if you have any, and to your close relatives. If you plan to remarry, your children should know first of your decision. You must ready your children for having a new family and new brothers and sisters. Uniting two families will not be stressful for you but for your children, most especially.

The next to be informed are your parents. Of course, they need to be in your wedding and informing them is a sign of courtesy to them. Next will be your ex, especially if you have arranged joint custody for the children. He should know that there will be some changes in your household.

Also, you should wear your new engagement ring. There mustn't have any trace of old flames on your fingers the moment you begin planning and announcing your second wedding.

-- Wedding Etiquette for a Second Marriage - Dress Issue

Widow brides who are getting married for the second time are expected to wear lilac or lavender dress. But these does not hold true nowadays. Wedding etiquette for a second marriage gives bride a chance to wear white dress again. Divorced brides can also wear white dress although they could remove the veil and tiara and instead simply wear flowers on your head.

-- Wedding Etiquette for a Second Marriage - Who to Invite?

When planning for your second wedding, think that you can invite any person you want to attend to your wedding. Refrain from inviting former in-laws and ex-spouses, even if you are on good terms with them. Guests may also feel awkward seeing and being around them.

If your children, however, requested that their father should be in the wedding, try to talk them out about it and tell them how awkward it would feel for the new in-laws and the new groom to see an ex-spouse around. Wedding etiquette for a second marriage does not obligate you to invite an ex-spouse to your second wedding, although you may do so if the situation warranted.

But if your new groom agrees to the idea of inviting an ex-spouse as requested by the children and your ex-spouse agreed on it, then you may invite your ex-spouse to attend your second wedding.

But there is a more sensible idea than inviting your ex-spouse to your wedding. Invite him to a dinner, perhaps at your home, with your children and new husband, if he is up to it. Tell your children that the dinner replaces the wedding invitation and your children may finally agree on not invitating their father on the wedding day. You may do this before or after your wedding or honeymoon.

About the Author

For brides that are serious about making sure there are no wedding day disasters -- Click Here. However, this is ONLY for brides that are seriously looking to avoid wedding day disasters.

2007-12-18T01:22:00.001-08:00

The Christian Marriage Contract by Gerald Mason

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Marriage is a lawful contract between a man and a woman by which they give to each other the perpetual and exclusive right to those bodily functions which are naturally apt to generate offspring. Just what does this mean? Since the bearing and rearing

Matrimony is a sacrament of the living. To get the graces attached to it, both parties must be properly baptized and in the state of grace at the time of receiving it. Unlike other sacraments.

Which are usually performed by a priest, the groom and the bride themselves are the ministers of the sacrament of matrimony. The priest has no part in the giving of the external sign. He merely acts as the Church's official witness of the contract.

The Church requires his presence, so that without him the marriage of a Catholic would not be valid. The marriage of two Catholics before a justice of the peace or a minister of some other religion is, of course, an invalid marriage.

A mixed marriage performed by a Protestant minister is not only invalid but also entails excommunication for the Catholic party. In some dioceses, this is also a "reserved sin," that is, it cannot be removed by an ordinary confessor, but recourse must be had to the bishop. In some dioceses, marriage before a justice of the peace also incurs a similar penalty. The severity of the punishment indicates the evil of the sin; one is cut off from the sacraments by excommunication until he repents.

A marriage contract cannot be entered into unless both parties freely express their marriage consent in words or equivalent signs. It must be definite and visible. In marriage this consent is ordinarily the "I will" pronounced separately by both the groom and bride.

It is precisely this expression of mutual consent which Christ uses to produce grace in the sacrament of matrimony.

A sacrament, as you know, is an outward sign instituted by Christ to give grace. The saying of "I will" by both the bride and the groom is not only the consent of the contract; it is also the outward sign of the sacrament.

It not only signifies, but also actually produces in the souls of the newly married couple an increase of sanctifying grace and the special grace of the sacrament of matrimony.

These special graces enable the couple to live up to all the responsibilities of married life.

Just when Christ instituted the sacrament of matrimony, we do not know. Some think that it was at the wedding feast of Cana, which He blessed with His presence.

Others say that He did so when He stated that marriage could not be dissolved. Still others maintain that marriage was made a sacrament when He spoke to His Apostles about matters pertaining to the kingdom of God, between His resurrection and His ascension. This latter is the more commonly accepted teaching.

The exact time when matrimony was instituted is, of course, unimportant. The fact that Christ actually did institute it is perfectly clear from the earliest traditions of the Church.

and education of children involve a certain amount of sacrifice on the part of parents, God made the attraction between the sexes a delightful experience. In marriage, "the sex act is one of intense pleasure.

Many people would not have entered the married state if they thought only of the trouble it involves. But they 'fall in love' and desire to fulfill that love in the sex act with the beloved.

To do this, they get married, have sex relations, a child is conceived and -- after nine months -- born. Marriage Is Both a Contract and a Sacrament

About the Author

Download Free Books On Dating & Weddings: Free Dating & Wedding Books http://www.greatpublications.com/date.htm

2007-12-09T01:34:00.001-08:00

marriage tip#1: It is OK to be Single by sas_lina.mao

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Here are 7 Tips for single woman from people who have a happy and long-term marriage...

Tip #1: It is OK to be Single

First of all, DON'T PANIC. Remember:

* There is no shame being single! * Marriage is not for everyone! * No need to marry a fool!

Marriage is not the destination for the entire human race. Being single is not a sin; you can choose to remain single, as long as it makes you happy.

Always remember why you want to get married: to find somebody who MAKES YOU HAPPY and be happy with him for the rest of your life.

Marriage is not for your parents, although your parents might want to just grab somebody on the street to finish this job.

Marriage is for your friends. Why you care others' voice more than the one from your own heart?

Marriage is not for saving face: there is no shame being single!

Marriage is not just another step in your life, just like going to college, finding a job or getting promoted. Trust me. It is a turning point in your life!

Marriage is not finding a patron or a living ATM: it is an enjoyable journey for you and another soul.

Marriage is not putting a beautiful dummy beside you: beauty is just a skin deep and will fade in years.

Marriage is not to get Children. Children are its natural result, not the purpose.

Marriage is not to get sex. You can get sex without marriage!

Marriage is not to get married. No need to marry a fool! A bad predicament possible is being married to someone you do not love. It will cause no end of grief and complications in your life.

An even worse living hell is being married so someone you do not love. Life is too short to waste this way!

Here are 7 Tips for single woman from people who have a happy and long-term marriage. Click here to get your FREE copy or go to http://www.roseforlove.com/7tips.html

About the Author

www.Roseforlove.com: is the direct supplier of feather roses, as well as all other gifts, artworks and fashion products. We also offer readers e-books and e-tips on rose, love, marriage, wedding, relationship, as well as other interesting topics.
Submitted by: Super Article Submitter

2007-12-06T20:03:00.001-08:00

The Institution of Marriage

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The Many Loves of Marriage by Thomas Kinkade
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GROUNDS FOR MARRIAGE, 1951 LC #2 (Kathryn Grayson)
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By: James Walsh

Once viewed as the very basis of the family unit and indispensable for the preservation of morals and civilization, its status and prestige have diminished considerably in recent times. Once hailed as the cornerstone of a stable society, it is increasingly viewed as merely one more “lifestyle”.

Many young voices are heard in the society today that condemn the exalted status and importance given to “getting married”. Many argue that it is an old and decadent arrangement failing to serve a purpose in today’s world.

Progressives, especially feminists, argue that marriage actually causes significant harm, formalizing patriarchal dominance while subjugating women and endangering their physical and mental well-being. They are of the opinion that marriage might do some good to men but definitely not to women. Many believe that the main reason for getting married earlier was to reproduce. Now that so many people are choosing not to have children or opting for single parenthood through IVF or adoption, there is no need for marriage.

But all is not lost. There are supporters of marriage, people who firmly believe in its sanctity as well as its importance in the upkeep of the social fabric. There have been many extensive studies and research which strongly illustrate the claim that matrimony is a unique relationship that enriches the lives of husband and wife in every observable way.

The benefits of marriage are most observable within the measurable realms of health, wealth, emotional and physical well-being. As compared to unmarried people, married people are happier, healthier, live longer, earn more, work harder and save more.

The act of getting married changes a great deal about the way couples behave and interact with one another, plan for the future and experience fulfilment. This transformation has immense effect on the social structure. Marriage changes people’s goals and behaviour in ways that are profoundly and powerfully life-enhancing:

1. Better Health: Married people have better emotional and physical health. They have the least limitations in normal daily activities including work, getting dresses, remembering and walking. They also experience the lowest amount of serious psychological distress or depression and are least likely to indulge in risky behaviour such as alcoholism or smoking.

2. Longer Life Span, Less Suicide: Married people live the longest due to their physical upkeep or well-being. They are also less likely to commit suicide as they are least likely to suffer from depression and other mental disorders.

3. Greater Wealth, Higher Incomes: Married people enjoy greater wealth than unmarried people and the longer they stay married, the more their wealth accumulates. Marriage particularly benefits men’s earning capacities. Studies show that married men earn 22% more than men who have never cohabited or married. This could be due to their mental happiness or satisfaction spurring them to work harder. It could also be due to the social perception of a married man as a stable, mature, and trustworthy person. Married couples have financial goals, they save together and save more for the future.

4. Less Violence: Marriage is the safest relationship for women in terms of economic, emotional and physical safety. The cases of physical abuse or domestic violence are more with women who are not married, are divorced, separated or single.

5. Social Benefits: Happy, stable marriages go a long way in promoting stronger communities and society. More stable marriages mean less social problems such as domestic violence, child abuse, and violent crimes. This results in safer homes and communities, less poverty, more wealth and youth who stay away from crime, alcohol and substance abuse. There are lesser incidents of premarital relations, STIs, and abortions, thus promoting healthier societies. Married parent homes are more likely to produce young adults who view marriages positively and maintain lifelong marriages leading to less divorce rate and more social benefits.

6. Legal Benefits: Law also provides for some legal benefits to married spouses such as inheritance or right to remain in family home over and above the claims of debtors, claiming elective share of estate even if one spouse disinherits, claim of spouse on monthly benefits of deceased worker, testimony privileges where any private communication between the couple is not admissible in a court without the consent of the partner and so on.
Article Resource: www.Articlebliss.com

2007-12-05T01:30:00.001-08:00

Getting a Mobile Notary Marriage by Blake A

It is funny seeing all the things a notary can do with their commission. Did you know that notaries can perform wedding ceremonies and solemnize marriage? Notaries in the states of Florida, Maine, and South Carolina have the authority to perform marriages. Though it is only performed in these 3 states there are some interesting aspects to notarizing a marriage and solemnizing the rites of matrimony. The fee of a notary public may not surpass that provided by law to clerks of the circuit court for the same thing. This does not apply to the fees set for affirmations or witnessing.

If you are from one of these 3 states and interested in this concept, wondering where to get started, you can purchase marriage packages online at the Non-profit National Notary Association (NNA) website nationalnotary.org. There are many places on the web to find marriage certificates, and special embossers. Knowing the importance of couples wedding vows and ceremonies, it is important to be professional and make sure you have all of the things you need according to state laws and according to couples preferences.

A reason notaries work as good officiates to momentous occasions such as marriage, is for people who want a non-religious ceremony. Another choice to consider is the price a notary will cost you compare to other facilities and or representatives. A notary cannot charge more than the original fee set by the state of Florida, Maine, or South Carolina. While researching this topic I went online and found that there are many notaries that advertise this service in those 3 states.

About the Author

Blake helps companies and people find a notary for wills, affidavits

and other documents that Notary Public notarize. Blake works

for a notary company in Seattle.

2007-12-03T18:57:00.001-08:00

Want to make a romantic marriage proposal? 5 tips for great Romantic marriage proposals! by M Porteous

So the day is coming, you are preparing yourself to ask that one special person to be your partner for life. This is it! This is the moment they will remember forever when they think back on their marriage; the all important proposal! You want this to be a special, magical and romantic marriage proposal. So what are the options? How can you make this day one to remember and blow her away with your ingenuity and charm? Well looking through lists of other peoples romantic marriage proposals is not going to give you something original and unique is it. You need to go deeper than that and create something special for just the two of you and using these 5 marriage proposal tips you can find that perfect idea!

1. Know your partner!
This should be obvious but it seems so many people completely ignore who their partner is and what drives them. If you are going to be married you need to know this person deeply. Doing something clichÃ©d, inappropriate or too left field is just not going to be memorable. Some great ideas can still be great ideas but they might be for a different person not your partner to be! Make sure this is for your partner ... not for you!

2. Money is not that important!
While an elaborate schemes and expensive settings can involve vast sums of money that is not what is important. Just hiring limos, paying for expensive meals or something along those lines will not impress a woman as much as something that comes from the heart and is original and has meaning between the two of you. While your proposal might involve lots of money make sure it is money spent doing the right things and remember that a great proposal can be done very cheaply!

3. Be unique!
While most things under the sun have been done it is best not to do something so overdone it is now a clichÃ© like the ring in the champagne glass or something similar. Also do not copy something that your partner will know has been done before that is just common sense. Even if you do want something traditional or are using an idea you have read about make sure there is a twist in it to set it apart and always remember rule number one!

4. Be creative!
Remember when you were a kid and you made that card for your mother out of stuff from around the house and it was the best damned card she ever got and keeps reminding you of it? That is not just a mothers love it is a genuine show of appreciation for making something with your own talents and most of all with your love. The same can apply to your marriage proposal because something that you have created be it a situation or something solid the fact you created it just for them from your own wits and hands is more important.

5. Don't get carried away!
There is a temptation in all this to go so overboard with ideas that the entire affair can be just too much. Also the more complicated something is the more chance things will go wrong. Just as money is not the most important thing neither is complexity! A simple idea done well and with love can be much more effective than an amazing theatrical show!

So there are the 5 tips to make a great romantic marriage proposal! Were you expecting great stories of romantic marriage proposals you could get inspiration from maybe? Well there are plenty of sites that do that but if you really want to impress your significant other you need to make sure the core of your idea follows these 5 steps!

Good luck!

About the Author

Need more advice to create the greatest day in your and your soon to be fiancÃ©s life?
Do you want to know the WORST marriage proposals and how to avoid those pitfalls?
Do you want to know the very greatest proposals that break away from all the tired old ideas?
Click here to open your eyes to more possibilities than you thought possible!

2007-11-29T03:13:00.001-08:00

Save Your Marriage Before It's Too Late by Ovi Dogar

Everyone wants to have a happy marriage. A happy marriage is one of the finest things life can offer. But after some time different kinds of problems appear in our life. It is true that many people give up on a marriage too soon, and too many marriages end up being weighted down by unresolved difficulties.

What happens if none of those things from the beginning of your relationship are happening any more such as: the little favors nowadays, cook your favorite meal, buy you something special; those little things that showed you she cares about you. Knowing that you may be losing the person you love is hard on anyone. Like most people in your situation you are probably feeling scared and confused, not knowing what to do next. If you feel that your marriage is crisis, don't show your partner that you're panicking; try to keep calm and in control your emotions.

Both of you need to remember that no matter how bleak things seem, it is possible for many marriages to get back on course, but both husband and wife should be willing to cooperate. The important thing is to stay calm and to know what to avoid and what to aim for to make relationship work. You can save your marriage even if your partner wants a separation, she asks for divorce, or doesn't love you anymore. But to stop divorce you need to avoid doing what hurts your relationship, knowing that there's always a hope to save your marriage.

Jealousy is one of the reasons why most people get divorce, but is not the only one. If she caught you with infidelity and that's why she wants to get divorce, the hardest thing you will need to do is to rebuild trust in your relationship: always be on time home, do what you say you do and be honest. Also, never lie to your spouse again, communicate clearly all the time, take time to reassure your spouse if she feels insecure, show her affection on regular basis and also be patient with her.

As I said there are many other reasons why people get divorce. This is usually a big mistake so try first to do all the sacrifices that are necessary to save your marriage:
-first and the most important is to identify your problems; take an honest look at the relationship and determine what the problems are; truly express what is disturbing you in, as much details as possible; look for solutions rather that blaming your partner
-if you are guilty for this situation, show her your companion, respect and affection; everyday remind her how much you love her and put meaning from the heart into those words
-start doing things that were usually done when both were still in loved and married
-express your feelings, communicate your feelings honestly and openly as you can
-establish open dialog and begin to compromise and heal; discuss about your feelings and come to an agreement about what you feel the relationship needs
-also you have to learn to listen as well; the things that are brought up should be treated as guides so that the couple will learn how to respect each other's feelings and points of view; she may talk about what she is feeling regarding the relationship
-you have to work hard to understand and change what is bothering your partner in the relationship; even if she still loves you, she may see some persistent problems in you, and that's why she may have lost hope for the relationship because of them; you have to understand better your partner's perception of these problems
-if you are getting stale on your sex life, talk to each other, spend more time alone just the two of you, go on a vacation
-open yourself to the fact that any issue can be understood and interpreted in a variety of ways, otherwise you will continue to stay in a rut
-think about the ways you contribute to the situation
-learn to internalize and understand that your partner is not you; both have to find ways to empathize with the other's point of view
-appreciate the value of the other's experience in the way that is different than yours
-don't allow old negative behavior patterns to swamp the present moment
-learn to forgive and forget; learn to forget anything and accept one another; bringing up the past will not save the marriage; one must learn to forgive the spouse and forget all the mistakes from the past
-seek both for a solution; remember that you are two different people; is not about who is wining here, it's about respect, intimacy, growth and emergence
-set goals to work as a couple, such as: to communicate without arguing, to attempt to do things as a couple, to find an end to your problems, and also write down your feelings and allow the other to read them
-last but not at least, be patient; your marital problems did not crop up overnight and they will not be healed overnight; discuss all the emotions that you both feel until you are centered and ready to begin anew

So, if you have some problems in your marriage, wait first to see if that marriage can be saved, don't be hurry to get divorced. Always have to think positive, that there is a hope to save your marriage no matter how many problems appear in your life. And remember that to have lasting satisfaction you need to know how to keep love and good feelings alive.

About the Author

Visit the largest database of romanian women at www.eBridex.com

2007-11-28T00:58:00.001-08:00

The Marriage Reasons by Daniel J. Belcher, Jr.

Well, let's get right to it. Marriage is a word that is becoming smaller and smaller in the America. Many people chose to live together instead of enter into the bounds of matrimony. Scripturally and moral, living to gather instead being married is a big mistake for several reasons which hopefully I will be able to explain later in this article. We will try to examine solid and positive reasons for marriage.

One to the major reasons for marriage is that it shows a sign of commitment. The word commitment means you are willing to pledge or promise. This indicates that you are willing to stick by one another even through the rough times. Everybody will suffer some kind of hardships in life's relationship. Do you have what it takes to hang in there? Or, Will you follow the cowards' well used trail? Marriage is a true sign of commitment and a sign of love.

Another thing the marriage factor shows is the promise of a future. You are in fact telling your spouse that you expect to be with them for many years from today, and I am willing to show that by marrying you. We do not, for the most part, know the future, but sometime you have to take step of faith. In essence, when you marry, you are saying that I will be there for you always. Do you see the different in the mind set of the married couple?

There is also an investment side to marriage. In fact, when we marry we are saying that I am willing to invest in us. That investment is in every part of our relationship, job, education, children, finance, health, and family. Our investments in our future are investments in the marriage factor. To get right to the point, when you marry someone you are in fact investing wholly, bodily and spiritually.

In reality, when we marry we are ending a single life. We are stepping into another kind of living. In short, we are adding another person to who we are. It is no longer just I but we. After we are married, most major decision must be determined by the inputs of both. The singleness of our lives is forever removed once we marry.

In conclusion, one of the greatest institutions in our society is the one of marriage. All through history we find the ideal of marriage as one of honor, respectability and righteousness. All of the world cultures see marriage as something very sacred. It appears that marriage will always be held in extremely high regard. Consider the marriage factor for yourself.

About the Author

I retired from the United States Navy in 2003, after serving over 21 years of enlisted active duty onboard several different ships and a few shore assignments. I am married. My wife and i have two daughters. We have two dogs, Chow Chow's, to be exact. I have a Bachelor of Science degree in Liberal Arts (Focus area Psychology) from Excelsior College class 2004. email: belwrites@yahoo.com

2007-11-26T01:21:00.001-08:00

Divorce or Marriage by Rob Maraby

What percent of marriages are saved versus those that end in divorce after reading your say "yes" to divorce manual? The name would indicate you are in the business of helping people pull the trigger on ending their marriage, not saving marriages. I know someone who wants to save their marriage and their spouse cannot make up her mind. It has been this way for a year and it seems it could go on like this forever. They are only 27 and have been married 3 years. She says she does not think she can make a decision. She filed for divorce and then said that did not feel right and it did not make her happy, but the idea of returning to her marriage does not feel right so she does nothing. They live apart and he just waits for her decision. There are no children so he is just stuck because he will not divorce her. Can your book help save this marriage or will it just end it?

Dear Karen On the contrary the manual is not about saying "yes" to divorce, nor is it about accepting marriage. It is about acceptance period! What is acceptance? It is recognizing that you need not make a choice to begin with!

What stops someone from being happy whether they are in or out of a relationship is thoughts! More specifically it is based on thoughts about what each person wants from the other, this is not love,., it is attachment and attachment leads quickly to hate! It will take very little to turn "a loving idea you have of someone" into hate if the love is not true and is based on lust, expectations and ideals.

If a marriage or relationship is based on a need or a want, it is not based on love and is doomed to fail or end up a bad one!

A true relationship should have no expectations or attachments, the person you are with, must be someone you love unconditionally and not based on an idea of what the person is or what they can give you!

It is said that "a thought is what separates two people"...and if you examine it you will see the truth to it... For instance, one partner cheats on the other-the fact of the matter is he/she cheated, now the act is done, but how it is received by his or their partner is another thing all together, it is how the other person looks at the thought of "Cheating." if they hold on to the thought, the relationship will end, if they don't hold on to the thought, they can work it out! In the end true love will create understanding!

The problem always is thoughts, you hold certain expectation of someone and when that Person goes against your expectations you get a divorce...or get unhappy or miserable

This again is not love...

What you have described is exactly what the book tries to solve...one partner expects something from another and no decision is made based on these expectations!

Only unhappiness will result because there is expectations, if one the other hand, your friend is able to rid herself of the thoughts that keep her bound she would be happy, with or without the marriage!

And that is what the manual does!

It makes her "release" all thoughts, decisions, concerns about her situation, when that happens, she ends up with a clear mind and the right decision is made -Sometimes no decision will be made but that would be the right decision! Understand that the world is not complete and never will be, go and ask any millionaire and he will tell you he wants more money, go and ask the man who has a beautiful model wife and his eyes still wander,

The mind is very restless and until you recognize how the mind works, you can never be happy! Mind always wants but it never gets enough!

Mind is nothing but a collection of thoughts, when you hold on the thoughts, mind becomes real, when you ignore the thoughts and see that they are not true, the world dissolves and you are at peace!

Mind rules you and you allow it to, the manual will allow you to sit on your mind and make you its ruler. Happiness and a clear quiet mind are the result!

Things are always perfect, it is only thoughts that make it otherwise, someone once described God as "what is"...God is "what is", , "what is" perfection! That is why the world seems chaotic, but the world is "what is" it is God, all the destruction and the happiness is God!

The devil , unhappiness and suffering comes when you try to change "what is", when you fail to accept and try to change things.

Acceptance is a very powerful tool, accepting what she is, who is she is and realizing that she is all that she needs is the only way to be happy and complete... I will end with this simple mantra and it goes "This is perfect - that is perfect Perfect comes from perfect. Take perfect from perfect The remainder is perfect. Let peace and peace and peace be every where"

Acceptance is peace and perfection...but the only way you will accept is if you are able to get rid of all the thoughts that tell you everything is wrong and needs to be changed! Hope this helps ROB http://www.mindnmuscle.com/Divorce.htm

What the manual does

About the Author

Rob Maraby is the author of 25 fitness and health books and many other.divorce or marriage articles. Read more .Divorce aticles at http://www.mindnmuscle.com

2007-11-17T00:46:00.001-08:00

Marriage Counseling Schools - How To Decide Which School To Attend by Steven Ross

If you're looking for more information about marriage counseling schools, then you have come to the right place. In this article I will give you some different options, as for schooling is concerned, that various marriage counselors have taken in helping married couples.

In order to be a licensed marriage counselor, you have to obtain at least a master's degree in a field related to marriage and family therapy. This is generally true for most states. There are a few states, however, where they require no license to practice being a marriage counselor, so therefore in those states no schooling is required.

In many different areas that students enter to study include some of the following -- strategic family therapy, structural family therapy, cognitive psychology, behavioral psychology, constructivist theories, psychodynamics, intergenerational theory, emotionally focused therapy, and multicultural therapy, to name a few.

However, just because a practitioner of marriage counseling is schooled in a certain area, doesn't mean they don't use techniques in other areas as well. In fact, most marriage counselors use techniques from several different areas, depending upon their feelings of what needs to be done for each individual client.

To find a graduate school related to a field in marriage counseling, you can do a search on the Internet for certified programs, to see what is within your area. You can get information about the school through online searches, such as how much tuition cost, and the different degree programs that are available to major in.

When considering a marriage counselor school, the first thing you should do is look at the rules for being licensed to practice marriage and family therapy in your state. This will give you an idea of the minimum requirements needed to become a licensed practitioner. Second, you need to consider exactly how far you want to go in education.

While a doctorate is not required, many marriage counselors have found it useful because it helps develop their techniques and skill level even further, so that they can aid their clients in a number of different ways. By understanding what you want out of practicing marriage counseling, you can then decide on whether or not you want to enter into a doctorate program.

In conclusion, I have given you some basic information on marriage counseling schools. Use this information to evaluate the best course of action for your situation, when deciding which area to study, when you decide to become a marriage counselor.

About the Author

Want To Learn More? Steven Ross has written many fantastic articles about how to improve your relationship and marriage. Go to http://www.couplecounselingreport.com Couple Counseling

2007-11-16T01:13:00.000-08:00

Six Tell Tale Signs Of Marriage Problems by Brandon Hong

All couples go through difficult times, when outside pressures just get the better of them and things start to go badly at home, and they aren't necessarily signs of problems in the marriage.

Financial stresses, family pressures, crazy schedules and career obligations can all cause strain on any relationship. So how can you tell if these problems are typical, or indeeds are signs of marriage problems that might be cause for concern?

Complacency. Many marriage counselors agree that one of the first warning signs of marriage problems is complacency. Taking each other for granted, neglecting to spend time together, or forgetting to say I love you can all be signals of potential marriage problems that can lead to a much larger crisis.

Decreased physical intimacy. If your previously passionate love life has taken a turn for the worse, this could be a warning signal of a marriage problem . Of course, life events like having children, moving, changing jobs, or medical problems call all effect sex drive, and doesn't necessary mean signs of marriage trouble. But if the trend continues for more than a couple of months, it is a sign of a marriage issue that needs to be addressed.

Avoiding conflict. In an effort to avoid a fight, some partners will avoid conflict altogether. While this may seem like a healthy reaction, in reality it only causes the underlying problem to fester. It can also lead to an explosion of bottled emotion once it finally comes out. Avoiding potential issues can be another tell tale sign of marriage problem.

Need to win. When one partner feels that they need to win every argument, you have a sure sign of a marriage problem. Marriage is a partnership, and requires teamwork. There should be no winning and losing in a marriage, only cooperation and working toward shared goals. If you aren't doing this, you may be showing signs of issues in your marriage.

Considering an affair. If one or both of you are considering, even half-heartedly, having an affair, you are showing signs of problems in your marriage. Have an honest discussion with your partner about what is missing in your relationship, and work out some ways to rekindle the romance and stop signs of marriage trouble before they start. The long-term damage to your relationship caused by an extra-marital affair can be devastating. So think long and hard before you go down that road.

Separate vacations, separate lives. If you find you and your spouse making plans without each other, whether it's separate vacations, hobbies that keep you occupied outside the house, or even separate bank accounts, you might be exhibiting signs of marriage problems. Remember that you are a couple, and that comes first, and you can nip these warning signals of marriage problems in the bud.

About the Author

Discover powerful and proven strategies to save your marriage put your marriage love life back on track. http://ways-to-save-a-marriage.info/blog/signs-of-marriage-problem/

2007-11-14T01:55:00.001-08:00

How to Save Your Relationship and Marriage by Gerry Restrivera

Relationships are hard to keep and at some point couples may find themselves caught in a difficult situation putting the marriage in trouble. There are ups and downs in a relationship and rough times make the marriage shaky, but it doesn't mean that the relationship needs to end. Although relationships are complicated, there are still advice and rules to follow if you really want to save your relationship and marriage.

Here are some useful advice on how to save your relationship and marriage.

Recognize and identify the problem in the relationship. Your marriage is in trouble and needs saving because there is a problem and couples should spot the problem. Are there needs not being met? Be honest with each other and respect each other's needs and find ways on how to compromise to meet those needs to save your relationship and marriage.

Learn to communicate effectively to save your relationship and marriage. Open communication is always the key to a successful relationship. Couples should learn how to successfully communicate with each other. Nagging and yelling is not an effective way to communicate and it will lead to more misunderstandings and hatred. Learn to express your feelings in a nicer way that the two of you can connect with each other. Learn the habit of exchanging loving words with each other.

Spend time alone with each other. With the demands of jobs, kids and household work, couples may find themselves too busy and too occupied with a lot of responsibilities. Always remind yourself that you need sometime with each other and you need to bond to save your relationship and marriage. It doesn't have to be a fancy and expensive date, what's important is that you have time for intimacy and enjoy each other alone. You may visit the place where you first met or walk together in the park and reminisce the good old days.

Be thoughtful and supportive to save your relationship and marriage. Any person will get closer to someone if he/she knows that the other person is thoughtful and supportive of his/her passion. Wouldn't it be great if that someone is you? For instance, if your spouse loves photography, you can give him gifts that he could use with his photography hobby. If she is into gardening, giving her things for her gardening will make her appreciates you more. Support your spouse and do not be self-centered to save your relationship and marriage. The support, understanding and appreciation of each other's passion will make the relationship stronger.

Seek professional help to save your relationship and marriage. If the marital problems are too much for both of you to handle, there is nothing wrong in seeking a professional help. Marriage counselors are experienced and trained to handle and give advice about marital problems.

Save your relationship and marriage now and rescue yourself from a lot of heartaches and pains. Do all you can to save yourself the heartache and misery of a marriage break-up. You owe it to yourself and your spouse to give it your best. Discover the best marriage advice and rebuild your failing relationship with your loved one. Learn how to resolve your damaging conflicts and rebuild the lost love in your marriage today. Visit Save My Marriage Today

To know more about saving your relationship visit Bring Back Lost Love

To find out more about Love, Dating and Marriage visit All About Relationships

About the Author

Gerry Restrivera writes informative articles on various subjects including How to Save Your Relationship and Marriage. You are allowed to publish this article in its entirety provided that author's name, bio and website links must remain intact and included with every reproduction.

2007-11-14T00:54:00.001-08:00

Does Marriage Counseling Work? by Steven Ross

If you've been considering marriage counseling, but are not sure of its effectiveness, then you will want to read this article. In it, we will discuss whether or not marriage counseling is the right course of action for you, depending upon your situation. Take this advice and consider it to make the right decision for your marital needs.

Improving communications is the one ingredient of success in marriage counseling. But communication can be helped or hurt by a number of different factors. Consider a couple who hasn't communicated properly in 15 years compared to a young couple who has just started poor miscommunication, and you will see how one is going to be easier to treat than another.

Also, couples who are open with each other are going to be more successful when using marriage counseling. If one partner is unwilling to open up, and doesn't want to make progress, then even the best marriage counselor in the world can do nothing for them. This is because communication requires two people.

How much you desire to resolve your conflict as a couple is how much marriage counseling can work for you. Without the proper determination to make progress, you won't have the right attitude to do the work to repair your marriage.

The satisfaction of many different married couples has been measured, after they have received marriage counseling. When a competent marriage counselor was used, couples have almost always reported satisfactory with the services. If you let it, marriage counseling will work for you.

The aim of the marriage therapist is to both help you deal with current problems, and also give you strategies to resolve future problems as well. There's no getting around the fact that even healthy marriages have disputes, and so in order to handle future disputes, effective counseling will show you how to do so.

Proper conflict resolution skills are taught to the married couple by the marriage counselor. That way all future disagreements can be worked together in a positive way, to keep your marriage stronger than ever.

The desire to improve your marriage is a key ingredient to having success when seeing a marriage counselor, and opening up and working together with your spouse.

About the Author

About the author: Steven Ross is a huge Couple Counseling enthusiast and can help you with all your couple counseling needs. For Couple Counseling advice hurry over to his new site at CoupleCounselingReport.com

2007-11-13T02:29:00.001-08:00

Just Some Little Information on Marriage by Amanda Maseko

With marriage many couples don't have security that their spouse is in the marriage to stay. First you should learn to talk to your spouse about your resolve to bring security to your marriage and kick the word "divorce" out of your relationship. Whatever the reasons are, the mean yours and ours syndrome is not likely to go away soon unless we can go into a marriage and truly become one with our spouse.

The problems

Complacency like many other common marriage problems is a bit like the plague. One of the most common marriage problems in recent times is entering into marriage with the expectation that it is likely to fail. And other one of the common marriage problems, which often materializes early on in a relationship, is boredom.

It is important to note that all marriage problems can't be solved and that there are plenty of ways to resolving marriage problems. Usually those struggling in marriage don't question their techniques or decide they are going to start practicing with a resource or a professional.

That having been said, it probably wasn't a good thing for individuals to feel that they were 'stuck' in a marriage - that they had no choice regarding whether to continue with the union. Don't let trivia get in the way just because your partner might leave their dirty underwear lying around it doesn't mean that it's the end of your marriage and it's probably a trait that was there long before you married. You could say that he probably thought that was a rare happening, but little did he know about your klutzy tendencies and that after you married, he'd be helping you up from floors all over the globe.

The counseling

A lot of the time, married couples will cringe at the idea of marriage counseling because they feel that it's an admission of failure. Regardless of the studies and opinions which seem to support the effectiveness of marriage / couples counseling, there are those who question it's effectiveness. While the above study provides raw data that supports the effectiveness of marriage and family counseling, a very interesting discussion on the question "Does Couples Counseling Work" from a public forum devoted to this topic offers a less clinical, but still positive view.

Some people who undergo marriage counseling, even some of those who instigate the counseling are not actually willing to change themselves. Some critics of counseling have made the argument that marriage counseling actually does more harm than good to relationships that are on the rocks.

Let's face it; if you're looking for advice on marriage, you could spend DAYS researching on the internet without even scratching the surface of all the marriage advice that's out there. If you are single, dating, or trying to get to "I DO" and spend too much time hurting and not enough time loving this may be the most important love relationship advice you could ever receive.

And if removing the television from your bedroom sounds too drastic, at least consider initiating a conversation with your spouse about these findings and whether your marriage might benefit from less TV watching in the evenings. Believe me; it's MUCH easier to do something nice for your spouse when you're feeling optimistic about your marriagethan it is to "force" yourself to be the first one to take a step towards a better marriage. Note: If "hugs = sex" in your marriage, it's time to make a change.

About the Author

Lets get more information and reviews through the following link: Ways To Save A Marriage.

2007-11-11T01:30:00.001-08:00

Infidelity.., And Saving Your Marriage by Mack M

Infidelity doesn't have to mean the end of your marriage. Recent studies have shown that around 45% of married women and 60% of married men are unfaithful at some point during their relationship. Infidelity can range from a one night drunken mistake to a.., planned and calculated affair. And is likely to have a long term effect on your relationship.   

Some people have affairs because they want to get out of the marriage and can't communicate that fact. Some even have affairs as a cry for help, an indication that something is seriously wrong in the marriage. While others are unfaithful for the thrill and excitement. True, being unfaithful isn't the best way to tell your partner that you are unhappy but it can be the wake up call that saves marriages.

Sometimes the very fact that a partner is unfaithful allows a couple to take an honest look at saving their marriage and working through their problems together.

Infidelity affects relationships deeply. It takes time to rebuild trust and decide whether you have a basis on which you can both make an effort to save the marriage. However, infidelity does not have to mean the end of a relationship. You can save your marriage. Don't make hasty decisions. Blame isn't very useful, either. Express how you feel and move on. Decide what you need to save the marriage. Rebuilding your relationship can take time and learning to trust your partner again will require some faith, but is a must if you plan on saving your marriage. 

Infidelity is a devastating experience. And yet, most couples who go through it can recover. How do they overcome the horrible memories of an affair after reconciliation... Forgive and Forget is a lot easier said than done.But if forgiveness is difficult, forgetting is probably downright impossible for many spouses. They are expected to forget some of the most painful experiences of their lives... While there is no excuse for infidelity, you will eventually have to move past it, if saving the marriage is on the agenda.

About the Author

Do you remember the handbook you got the day you married? You know, the one that told you how to easily fix problems and issues as they came up in your marriage? Well if you didn't get the marriage manual then, you really need to get it now! Http://It-Saves-Marriages.eoltt.com

2007-11-11T01:29:00.001-08:00

It Saves Marriages... by Mack M

WARNING!!! What I'm About To Tell You Will CHANGE  Your Marriage Problems Forever! Do You Have Frustrating Sticking Points That You And Your Spouse Are Unable To Fix? Feeling Powerless While Your Marriage Falls Apart Around You?

My New Premium Home Study Course Will Demolish The Mistakes That Have Held Your Marriage To Ransom, While You Discover New Perspectives And Behavioral Methods... You'll Rekindle The Love You Have Always Craved With Your Spouse AND Have Them Eagerly Awaiting MORE!

I Mean Just Check-Out What's Involved... The Save My Marriage Today Premium Home Study Course is one of the most comprehensive collections of real-life marriage advice for solving real marriage issues. We researched what the most searched marriage problems were, and asked thousands of people just like you. The thousands of issues fell into some key relationship areas. Then we went and built a skill-based course specifically to address the issues and areas that are most important to YOU

You will be amazed at how applicable our course is and how much we can transform your marriage success! That's why we know you need to get this course if you really are serious about saving your marriage! It truly is ALL RIGHT HERE, all in ONE COURSE! Honestly, there is so much in this course, you are going to be overwhelmed!

You're Not Alone - The Save My Marriage Today Team is Here to Help! It's like having a marriage counselor in your very own living room! Think of my Premium Home Study Course as marriage insurance. Not only can it heal and repair your marriage from the most common marital problems, but it will also strengthen and fortify your marriage against future troubles. No matter what challenge your marriage faces, you'll be prepared to face it as a team.

Studies show that taking a skill-based marriage preparation course makes it much less likely that a couple will divorce by the five-year mark. Find out how to deal with the most common and deadly marital problems NOW before you have to face them in your marriage! According to Psychology Today, a happy marriage is worth $115,000 a year. The average cost of divorce is $20,000, and that's not even counting your increased risk of depression, high blood pressure, and heart disease OR losing one to two years of your life to the divorce process and working through the emotional damage! Even worse, women may find themselves considerably poorer after a divorce.

Imagine having the ability to create the dream marriage you always wanted, where you both understand each other, love each other, communicate openly and genuinely with each other, and commit to learning and growing in love together every day of your lives. Imagine the type of marriage where you can put the arguments and difficulties of your past behind you, and avoid making those mistakes again! How does that sound?

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2007-11-06T01:29:00.000-08:00

The Secret To How To Save Your Marriage by Mark Hanson

Marriage is supposed to be forever, and when I got married I expected it to be. I loved the women I was marrying and it seemed to me that we would be with each other for life. We had kids, we were still getting on great and we'd been married for quite a while. Then we hit a bad patch. I thought we'd get over it but it seemed to be a long bad patch. I kept at it but then it started to become depressing. For both of us and the kids. That's when I decided to do something about it.

I didn't talk to my wife about it. I decided to try and sort things out on my own first. The best way to do that? The internet. I searched about for "How to repair my marriage", "how to save my marriage" etc. Then I came across a product called "Save My Marriage Today", so far so good. It seemed like what I was looking for, but I've always been hesitant to order products based on how they look. I researched the product and found great reviews for it all across the internet. I was happy with the reviews so I took the leap and ordered the product.

The book arrived and I read it very quickly. I devoured the information and took it all in. I started to make subtle changes in my actions, which the book suggested, and at first things made a small improvement. Then another month passed, and another and another. That's when thing's totally changed. Everything was great again, and I did it all myself. I couldn't believe it. My marriage was saved without having a potentially disastrous "this marriage isn't working" chat with my wife. I'm so happy now. The marriage is saved and our family is intact.

Whenever my married friends say that they're having problems with their marriage, I refer them to this product, so I thought I'd do it for the whole of the internet as well. Here's the link to it, if it works for you, then great, I'm pleased that I've helped someone:

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About the Author

How to save your marriage.

2007-11-04T18:17:00.001-08:00

Honest Ways To Save Your Marriage Even If Your Spouse Cheated

By: Brandon Hong

So your spouse has cheated, and you are wondering what to do now? If you are interested in trying to work things out, saving a marriage after affair is possible. It has been done many times before, and can happen in your life with some work.

Here are some methods to save and salvage a marriage after an affair:

a) Seek therapy.
Saving a marriage after affair entails a lot of communication, a lot of delving into past situations and relational patterns that resulted in the affair to begin with. To save a marriage an after affair can mean months or even years of regular therapy with a professional marriage counselor, and it should be undertaken by both you and your spouse, together.

b) Make a committment to each other.
Consider your commitment to the work and to each other. Saving a marriage after affair means that both spouses will need to make a permanent, serious decision that they want to stay together, and that they are willing to do the work it takes. To save a marriage after affair is not easy, and can try even the strongest persons' sense of self and emotions. If one or both of your are not totally willing to do the work it takes to stay together, you will likely not succeed in saving a marriage after affair.

c) Rebuild the relationship. After an affair, the relationship is probably pretty much destroyed and possibly hanging on only by a thread. When saving a marriage after affair, it is important to make big changes right now to forge a path toward each other again. Apologies can help, but when it comes to really saving a marriage after an affair, they won't repair the damage that has been done. But seeing some remorse on the part of the cheating spouse can be a first step to real healing down the road.

d) Avoid blame and disrespect. If your spouse has cheated, it is natural to feel anger and sadness, and there will be times when your sense of blame is on High. In the end, though, to genuinely save a marriage after an affair requires the willingness of both spouses to take a step back from blame, retribution, revenge, and guilt trips. The first priority in saving a marriage after your spouse has cheated or had any affair should be to build a path back to each other, where mutual respect and love can be found again. No one said this part is easy, but if saving a marriage after an affair is your aim, it's a necessary part of the journey.

e) Spend time with each other.
To save a marriage after affair isn't a process that can be quickly taken care of in a couple weeks. It will take a lot of time and effort, and hours and hours of talking and listening to each other. There will be rough spots through the process, but if saving a marriage after affair is truly your desire, you can and will find success towards that goal.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:

Put an End to the Stress and Anxiety of Not Knowing What to Do to Save Your Troubled Marriage! Get proven marriage tips and advice today. www.ways-to-save-a-marriage.info

Article Source: http://www.article-directorysite.com

2007-11-02T16:06:00.001-07:00

Just Some Little Information on Marriage by Amanda Maseko

The problems

The counseling

About the Author

Lets get more information and reviews through the following link: Ways To Save A Marriage.

2007-11-01T18:21:00.001-07:00

Grow Your Marriage by William Grigsby

You either grow your marriage or weaken it: all the time you and your spouse either grow apart, weakening your marriage, or grow together, making it strong. For you and your spouse to grow your marriage, both must share with each other preferences, opinions and ideas. Getting to know someone truly, inside and out, takes effort. If you put no effort into your marriage, you're not maintaining it, you're letting it deteriorate and you are growing apart. A marriage that grows together is one where both individuals make an effort to find out what is going on inside their spouse's head. They appreciate, understand, and respect that information.

When both partners don't communicate or share life changes, they can wake up one day and find themselves sleeping next to a stranger. You didn't marry your partner to get a carbon copy of yourself. Chances are that the differences between you and your partner sparked your interest and made each one of you fascinating to the other. If he's artistic and you're analytic, or you're impulsive and he's rational, you are likely to be complementary personality types who bring out the best in each other. The question is whether those differences are enough to break your marriage apart or just right to add the spice to grow your marriage.

You don't remain the same person that your spouse met. But spouses can be resistant to changes in their partner, because they see it as a sign that their partner is dissatisfied with things as they are. When one partner suggests a change, the other partner often feels indirectly criticized, thinking that the other person means that status quo is not good enough. Reassuring your partner is essential during this tough time. Changes are frightening, but when there is communication, honesty, and willingness to compromise at every step of the way, change can be an enormously positive thing, allowing you to grow your marriage. Any change that can be undertaken mutually is better than a change that can only be undertaken individually.

It doesn't mean that neither of you ever changes. It doesn't mean you're thinking alike, or avoiding conflicts, or not having disagreements. Growth, by definition, is change. A healthy, lasting marriage is one in which both people mature and change their ideas, perspectives and plans. You will grow your marriage when you share those changes openly and honestly with your spouse as they occur.

In more fundamental areas, like your values, goals, and vision for your marriage perhaps you have major incompatibilities that make it difficult to grow your marriage. If you and your partner differ significantly in your upbringing, the importance you place on family, and your need for and ability to express physical affection, you may have a more difficult time accepting and negotiating your differences. This is why cross-cultural relationships can be so challenging. If your partner is from a significantly different culture from your own, you will need to be extremely open, understanding, and flexible in how you approach resolving marital issues.

If you are at the point in your marriage where you think that you and your partner are unable to resolves differences between you and you find it impossible to grow your marriage, it is worthwhile to invest in a marriage counselor. Counseling is much cheaper than a divorce and provides a neutral environment where both partners feel comfortable opening up and examining their true feelings.

You are thinking, perhaps, that marriage counselors are far too expensive for you. That's not so! You can get low-cost, easily affordable and excellent advice as well as personal training, through the Internet, from first-class, professional marriage counselors who have many years of experience and success,. You will find a group of men and women that can solve even the toughest kind of differences and allow you to grow your marriage. You can find excellent low-cost professional advice, including a free six-part course on solving marriage problems at: grow your marriage.

About the Author

William Grigsby, a retired multinational corp. executive, is now a consultant and writer.

2007-10-30T18:03:00.001-07:00

4 Major Reasons Why Marriages Succeed or Fail by Paul Jones

No one gets married expecting to get divorced. Why bother in the first place? We are filled with hope when we say "I Do" to that other person. But the cold reality is that, the divorce rate in America is ridiculously high and is rising every day.

Many people think they have to watch out for the infamous seven-year itch that comes about after seven years of marriage. Today, couples need to watch out for the two-year itch. Dissatisfaction in marriages happens earlier and earlier as people become more disillusioned with their dreams when they don't become reality as quickly as they think it should. And now, a divorce is easier to get than a driver's license.

Think it's a travesty? Maybe it is. But it's reality. So why do marriages fail? While the answers to that question are many, there is a growing body of research to suggest there are four negative risk factors that create barriers to oneness in marriage and increase a couple's chances for marital failure.

The First, negative behavior patterns can have a hugely negative impact on a marriage. This occurs when partners respond negatively to each other continually upping the ante so the conversation gets more and more hostile.

When a conversation escalates into an argument, this creates tension that can eat away at a marriage. Each negative comment increases the level of anger and frustration, and soon a small disagreement blows up into a major fight.

Frequently there are threats to end the relationship. Over time those angry words damage oneness, and angry threats to leave begin to seem like prophecy. Once negative comments are made, they are hard to take back and drive a knife into the partner's heart.

The second next negative factor that contributes to the erosion of marriage is invalidation. Invalidation is a pattern in which one partner subtly or directly puts down the thoughts, feelings, or character of the other.

Invalidation can take many forms. Sometimes it can be caustic, in which one partner (or both) attacks the other person verbally. You can hear, and even feel, the contempt one partner has for another.

Sarcastic phrases like "Well, I'm sorry I'm not perfect like you" or "I forgot how lucky I am to be married to you" can cut like a knife. These are attacks on the person's character and personality that easily destroy a marriage. Research has found that invalidation is one of the best predictors of future problems and failure of a marriage.

Negative interpretations are the third risk factor toward a failing marriage. Negative interpretations occur when one partner consistently believes that the motives of the other are more negative than is really the case.

Such behavior can be a very destructive pattern in a relationship, and quickly erode intimacy and oneness in a marriage. A wife may believe that her husband does not like her parents. As a result, she may attack him anytime he is not overly enthusiastic about visiting them. He may be concerned with the financial cost of going home for Christmas or about whether he has enough vacation time. She, in turn, considers his behavior as disliking her parents.

When a relationship becomes more distressed, the negative interpretations mount and help create an environment of hopelessness. The attacked partner gives up trying to make himself or herself clear and becomes demoralized.

Finally, there is withdrawal and avoidance. These are two different manifestations of the problem wherein a partner is unwilling to get in or stay in a discussion that is too threatening.

Withdrawal can be as obvious as getting up and leaving the room or as subtle as 'turning off' or 'shutting down' during an argument. The withdrawer often tends to get quiet during an argument, look away, or agree quickly to a partner's suggestion just to end the conversation, with no real intention of following through

Avoidance reflects the same reluctance to get into certain discussions, with more emphasis on the attempt to not let the conversation happen in the first place. A person prone to avoidance would prefer that the topic not come up and, if it does, may manifest the signs of withdrawal just described.

The research shows that couples that want a good marriage need to eliminate these risk factors from their marriage, or else the negative factors will overwhelm the positive aspects of the marriage. It is never too late to put your marriage back on track.

About the Author

Paul Jones writes about women's health, fitness, and beauty. Listen to what Amy Waterman has to say about resolving conflicts and re igniting the passion in your marriage. Apply her techniques and give your marriage a second chance...

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2007-10-14T02:18:00.001-07:00

3 Simple, Easy Tips to a Happier, More Fulfilling Marriage... by Calle Zorro

Introduction

Commonly, men and women hold a distinction in their minds between themselves and their marriage. Their personal self is one thing and their marriage is another.

Perhaps this makes sense at certain levels, but when a marriage has fallen short of what it's meant to be, this notion is problematic. It's problematic because there's often an unconscious concept that it's the "marriage" that needs help rather than one's self.

In other words, the marriage becomes a third-party entity that needs help - but a third-party entity can seem hopelessly hard to help because it involves "other" people.

The solution is to rid yourself of the mostly-unconscious notion that your marriage is an unknown third-party entity without a face and realize that your marriage is you and another person - and that means a FULL 50% of your marriage is completely and totally in your control.

And, when you personally INSIST that your 50% share of the marriage is going to be right and good, it's highly probable that you'll influence the remaining 50% of the marriage to be right and good too.

So, keeping in mind that it's useful and helpful to try to "fix" one's "self" rather than a "marriage", here are three tips YOU can use to make your 1/2 right and good:

1. Become Happier Yourself

While you certainly want to be happy with someone you care about, it's not another person who can make you happy. Only you can make yourself happy.

If you're looking to your spouse to "make you happy" you're sure to be disappointed. And, the more you look to them to make you happy, the unhappier you'll become. And that makes it even more impossible for you to be happy.

But, when you make yourself happier, oddly enough, that's when you can be happier in your marriage TOGETHER.

That means taking personal responsibility for doing things that make you happy.

There is something you can do right now that once you've done it, you can't help but feel happier - and more able to appreciate and enjoy your marriage.

Maybe it's a dance class. Maybe it's a workout at the gym. Maybe it's simply flipping through some picture albums. I'm not sure what it is, but you already know.

Go ahead, scan right on past all of the CANT'S and go right to the CAN'S!

Let go of what you can't do. Let go of what you don't have. Let go of what's unavailable or out of reach for now. Let go of what someone else should or should not have done.

Within the realm of your own personal self and the resources available to you, what can you do right now that will cause you to feel happier?

What is it? Let your mind feed you the answer, right now, and then go do it.

Your marriage will be the happier for it. 2. Remember To Have Fun

Any and every unpleasantness can not only be more bearable but in some cases it can even be made to be enjoyable when it's mixed with some fun. And, all it takes to have fun is a bit of imagination. Think of small children. Nothing more than a cardboard box and a vivid imagination can lead to an entire afternoon of amazing fun.

A husband and wife I know tell of two years in college where they were financially unable to eat out at even a cheap restaurant. But still, every Friday evening, they would scrape together enough change to buy two tacos apiece from a nearby taco vendor.

Then, as they sat at a rusted old picnic table and ate their tacos they would pretend they were eating delicacies from different countries around the world. They would describe to each other what it was they were eating and how wonderful it was. They would even get into describing the surrounding sights and sounds that accompanied their food.

As silly as this may seem, this couple was able to create powerfully happy memories in spite of it being an extremely difficult and unpleasant time in their lives.

Incidentally, the time eventually came when they did in fact enjoy the delicacies, sights, and sounds that they imagined during those times when they had no money.

What about you? What silly things can you do with your spouse that cost little to nothing but could be immensely fun - and make unpleasant circumstances more bearable?

Could you go to a nearby state or federal park and imagine you're walking in your own private park and the people who work there are your employees whose job it is to take care of the grounds and facilities for you...

Or, could you rope off a ring in your living room and have a pillow-fight where you pretend that you and your spouse are contending for a UFC or WWF Championship? What wild, wacky and weird name would each of you assign to yourselves? What kind of outrageous outfits could you each get into? Do you have one kid who can be the announcer and another who can be the referee?

Possibly, you're feeling better already just for having let your mind imagine yourself being in these silly - yet fun-sounding - scenarios.

What makes a clown funny? It's his or her "clowning" around, right? It's their goofiness, silliness, absurdity, and even utter nonsense that makes them funny, is it not?

You could be goofy, silly, absurd, and nonsensical if you wanted to be, couldn't you?

3. The Only Thing That Doesn't Change Is Change Itself

It's useful to remember that the way things are right now is not how they will always be.

Things WILL change.

And eventually, they change for the better. Experience has shown that no matter how unpleasant things may seem right now, sooner or later things turn around for the good.

Knowing then that better times are coming, what can you do right at this time to help prepare for - or even to receive - these better times?

What can you do at this time to PRE-ENJOY these better times?

What satisfaction can you garner from merely ANTICIPATING the coming better times?

What are the things that are good and right, now? What do you have and enjoy at this moment that if you lost it, you would really be unhappy?

One exercise that's a real eye-opener is to write down a list of everything that if you didn't write it down, it would be gone tomorrow morning. As a basic yet important example, on your piece of paper, you'd probably want to write down vision since your life would undoubtedly be significantly worse off if you were to lose your eyesight.

When you consider all that you have and enjoy in light of losing it if you don't write it down, you begin to see just how much is right and good in your life.

If arrival at a desired destination is the only time and place one can be happy, then life is destined to be an unhappy affair. And, when you set your mind to it, you can begin to notice and enjoy happiness and satisfaction during the journey to the destination too.

Conclusion

If you'll free yourself to do it, you can make yourself feel better by choosing to do things that make you feel happier.

If you'll let loose your lighter side and activate your imagination, you can make the mundane exciting and the unpleasant bearable - all while creating fond memories that you'll look back on for the rest of your life.

If you'll join yourself to the idea that good sooner or later prevails and that everything eventually turns to the good, and while you share your marriage with your spouse you begin to notice all that is good and right at this time, the path of life becomes so much more enjoyable.

By personally choosing to act on these three tips right away, you begin to do your part to create a happier, more fulfilling marriage.

###

About the Author

Men want a woman whose fire is lit. Women want a man who can light her fire. Here's the resource that shows a man how to light his woman's fire...click over to http://www.NymphomaniacWife.com.

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2007-10-07T07:32:00.001-07:00

To Save Your Marriage by William Grigsby

Right now, maybe in appearance there's nothing wrong in your marriage but, perhaps underneath, there's an uneasy feeling that has given you a wake-up call. You need to know what factors could be working against your marriage at this very moment. You shouldn't delay or hesitate - the best thing to do is get the advice of professional marriage counselors. They can help you discover what might be the cause of a problem, as well as how you can find a way to save your marriage.

Regardless of whether you're a man or a woman, whether you pay the bills or stay at home, or whether you need your spouse more than your spouse needs you, there is only one person in control of any relationship. That person has the power to turn a relationship around or run it into the ground. And that person usually never realizes how much power he/she wields until it is too late. Who is that person? - You.

A happy, fulfilling relationship begins with you. If you transform yourself--your attitude, the way you communicate, how often you show love and affection--your partner will be incapable of resisting, and you will be able to save your marriage. You have the power to transform your marriage, even if your partner doesn't want to. That's because your behavior has an enormous influence on your partner, to the point that married people actually grow alike over time. We can't help but pick up our partner's moods, preferences, and ways of saying certain things.

According to Michael P. Johnson, professor of sociology at Penn State University, there are three things that keep a person in a marriage: people want to stay, they feel they ought to stay, and/or they have to stay. This combination of personal, moral, and structural commitment serves to keep people in marriages. Notice that commitment - not happiness - will help you to save your marriage.

It's not love and luck. It's commitment and companionship. Commitment means that you have powerful personal, moral, and structural reasons to stay in the relationship. Companionship means that you and your partner form a unified team against whatever challenges life hands you. Team members may fight, disagree, and encounter stalemates, but you both know that your happiness and satisfaction in life depend on the success of each of you together--not on your individual success - to save your marriage.

Research shows that unhappy periods in a marriage are not indicative of future unhappiness. In fact, one study showed that 86% of unhappily married couples who stayed with their marriage were happier five years later--three fifths of whom were "quite" or "very happy."

You are thinking, perhaps, that marriage counselors are far too expensive for you. That's not so! You can get low-cost, easily affordable and excellent advice as well as personal training, through the Internet, from first-class, professional marriage counselors who have many years of experience and success,. You will find a group of men and women that can solve even the toughest kind of problem that may be dividing a couple. You owe it to yourself and to your spouse to take action today as a first step to save your marriage.
You can find excellent low-cost professional advice, including a free six-part course on solving marriage problems at: to save your marriage.

About the Author

William Grigsby, a retired multinational corp. executive, is now a consultant and writer.

2007-10-07T07:30:00.001-07:00

Rekindle Lost Love: Stop Your Divorce and Save Your Marriage Now by Gerry Restrivera

Keeping a relationship especially marriage is a very difficult task. In involves two people with different minds, views, opinions, attitudes and behavior. Jobs, kids and other responsibilities also make it hard to focus on each other and sometimes marriage becomes a routine instead of a happy, healthy and loving relationship. Sometimes when you are experiencing a lot of marital problems and issues, divorce becomes an option without realizing that you can stop your divorce and save your marriage.

Is it worth to stop your divorce and save your marriage? Marriage has its ups and downs and sometimes you get confused on how to make things work. There are a lot of couples who give up on their marriage unnecessarily, not knowing what to do and they thought ending the marriage is the best solution. If they knew what to do, it will save them from a lot of hassles, stress and heartaches.

There are things you can do to stop your divorce and save your marriage. Doing the best you can to save your relationship is always the best option and here are some tips to help you fix a troubled marriage.

Open communication. This is a very important factor to stop your divorce and save your marriage. Sometimes your spouse say things hurting your feeling or the words are interpreted negatively leading to communication gap. When you both start to have problems talking and communicating with each other, the relationship will start to get shaky. Effective communication is always important in any marriage. If you find it hard to communicate effectively with your spouse, you can get advice and help. Open communication is important to stop your divorce and save your marriage.

Love your spouse unconditionally. In marriage you will find out that your partner is not as perfect as you think he or she is. You will discover flaws, faults and a lot more. But you also have to realize that you have faults too and you are not perfect. This is where unconditional love comes in, loving your spouse unconditionally despite of his or her flaws. If you really want to stop your divorce and save your marriage, you will learn to accept that you and your spouse are not perfect and have to love each other unconditionally.

Many couples give up their marriage and go through so much pain because they do not know how to deal with their marital problems. Do not give up your marriage. Do you want to put an end to the stress and anxiety of not knowing what to do to save your troubled marriage? Discover proven methods to getting your marriage back on track - even if you are the only one who wants to work on it. Stop your divorce and save your marriage visit Save My Marriage Today

To know more about saving your relationship visit Bring Back Lost Love

To find out more about Love, Dating and Wedding visit All About Relationships

About the Author

Gerry Restrivera writes informative articles on various subjects including Rekindle Lost Love: Stop Your Divorce and Save Your Marriage Now. You are allowed to publish this article in its entirety provided that author's name, bio and website links must remain intact and included with every reproduction.

2007-10-05T02:06:00.000-07:00

Real Marriage Secrets - Three Reasons You Don't Want A Divorce by W. Mark Thompson

Marriage statistics are down. They're falling fast year after year it seems. The specific marriage statistic I'm talking about it is the statistic that could be labeled "Staying Married". No one is doing it any more.

Why don't people stay married longer than they do? Why don't they stay married for life? Maybe it's because they don't have remember or have a reason to stay married.

Real Married Secret #1: Care For Your Children This secret is in no way implying that you do not care for your children. But, because you are searching for every possible answer to the marriage secrets question, more than implies that you care for your children. It screams you love them. With that said, consider this. If divorce has ever entered into your mind as a solution to your problems, then ponder this scenario. If you knew that your child would be punched in the stomach as hard as one could punch a child every day of your child's life, but the alternative would be for you to take that punch, which would you choose? In essence, that's what would be happening if you chose to stay married and there never was a resolution to your marriage problems. You would be transferring that emotional blow from your child to yourself. The plan, should you choose to take that blow, should also be to find a resolution for your marriage problem(s).

Real Married Secrets #2: There Is A Conclusion The bad times will be over. There are a lot of times we think it's good to go with a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Staying married to your spouse is the ultimate answer to any problem. Just like fire strengthens steel, struggles and strife will strengthen your marriage when the conclusion of the problem arrives. It may be an ongoing problem that may not resolve for years. But, work through it, together, and you will, as a married couple be stronger if you do.

Real Marriage Secret #3: Commit to the Creator In a Christian marriage setting, there are vows, promises and commitments made. These commitments are not taken lightly. If you're a Christian and you took these vows, the commitment hierarchy works like this: The first commitment you made was to God. The second commitment was to your fiancé. The third was to others who may be involved in the marriage like other children and family members. If you are to remain faithful to those promises and commitments that you made, the only way to break your commitment to your spouse - i.e. divorce - is to first sever your promise and commitment with God. Usually people don't consider this when they are thinking about divorce. But this is the way it is. That's why God doesn't take marriage lightly. It's a lifelong commitment.

With those three real marriage secrets reasons out there, I have to acknowledge that there are some situations where you must leave. Those would include - but are not limited to - life-threatening circumstances for you or your children.

If that is your situation, I commend you for staying in that relationship as long as you have and do not blame you for leaving. You can't really call something like that a marriage. You have to keep yourself and loved-ones safe. My prayers are with you.

However, if you are one who just wants out for convenience-sake, this message is for you. There are other ways to go. Don't crush your commitment. Find a way to make it work. There are three reasons above why you should.

About the Author

W.M. Thompson authors of "Real Marriage Secrets...Revealed" - a book that shows how married couples can make their marriage work, even if they feel there's no way to continue in the marriage. Marriage problems plague this nation and the first step to the answer is Real Marriage Secrets

2007-10-05T02:04:00.001-07:00

Spouse Immigration Law and Fraudulent Marriages by Kip Goldhammer

Spouse immigration laws are always very stringent and are followed very strictly by all countries. Firstly, the documentation and other necessary certificates are checked very thoroughly for people coming into a country under the Spouse Immigration Law. If there are any inconsistencies in the documents, the individuals are immediately deported or denied entry into the country. Needless to say, such incidents are an everyday matter in cases where people from a poorer country are trying to get into a richer country, them commonly being the USA and Canada.

Fraudulent marriages are another way through which men and women get into a country easily under the Spouse Immigration Law. In such a case, men and women vouch for the foreigner as their fiance, husband or wife and help them enter into the country. Once the individual is inside the country, they wait for a proper span of time - say six months - and file for divorce or separation. In such a way, the person comes into the country under spouse immigration laws, but is soon a single person in due course of time.

Such fraudulent marriages are commonplace, with most of them being mere financial transactions, wherein the alien pays a certain amount of money to the citizen to get them into the country. Earlier, most of such interactions were carried out clandestinely and off-line. But today, more and more people are coming online to carry out these antics. The Internet is one of the freest media and the basic lack of security makes it a very good place to carry out such conversations and therefore, decisions.

There is almost no way that the authorities can find out whether a citizen and alien are getting together for a fraudulent marriage with spouse immigration laws in mind. More commonly, the US citizen vouches for the alien as being their fiance, and once again, there is almost now way for the authorities to know the truth until they are too late.

The again, the entire concept of fraudulent marriages for spouse immigration laws is very complex. There is no set modus operandi that the US citizen as well as the alien is hand-in-glove to carry out this scam. There are chances that the alien has hoodwinked the US citizen so that they can get into the country riding piggyback on the US citizen's passport.

There are specific websites, blogs and message boards which cater to fraudulent marriages under the Spouse Immigration Act. Some individuals also quote a 'going rate' or 'coming rate' for the same.

Finally, it should be remembered that all such fraudulent acts are scrutinized quite thoroughly and in almost all cases, there are possibilities to get a judicial rap on the knuckles, which could be deportation to say the least, and arrest to say the most. Hence, it is advisable not to fall prey to such deals, and make use of genuine methods in acquiring passports and visas to other countries.

About the Author

http://www.spouseimmigration.com Spouse ImmigrationSpouse Immigration dot com is a great source of information if you are looking for help on how to immigrate to another country. Authored by Kip Goldhammer

2007-10-04T02:03:00.001-07:00

Spouse Immigration Law and Fraudulent Marriages by Kip Goldhammer

There are specific websites, blogs and message boards which cater to fraudulent marriages under the Spouse Immigration Act. Some individuals also quote a 'going rate' or 'coming rate' for the same.

About the Author

2007-10-03T02:24:00.001-07:00

Why second marriages are more likely to fail: The challenges of blending families by Richard Nicastro, Ph.D.

Are you ready for the understatement of the year? Here it is: Kids will make your second marriage a complicated and challenging experience. The reason is clear: In most circumstances, children do not want their parents to divorce. Therefore, the idea of you meeting someone new and finding happiness is not a priority in the appropriately egocentric world of your child. So your children's view of your new marriage will necessarily be very different from your own.

Children are angry about the loss of their old family and anxious about the creation of a new one. Some children are quite good at hiding these feelings, while others will make their anger known every step of the way. Even if your children genuinely like your new spouse, you should remember that your son or daughter already has two parents. For many kids, the more they like their new step-parent, the more traitorous they feel toward the biological parent they perceive as being "left behind." Struggles with divided loyalties can lead children to disrupt arrangements between you and your new mate.

Say goodbye to the honeymoon:

Second marriages that include children from a previous relationship start in overdrive. First marriages begin in the bliss of the honeymoon phase of the relationship--just the two of you, getting to know each other within your romantic cocoon. In second marriages that include children, the honeymoon phase is replaced by an adjustment phase. There is little time to bask in the glow of each other's love when your son is protesting that his new stepsister has the bigger room. Bert, an accountant in Providence, captured this adjustment period aptly: "It felt impossible for me and Judy to feel good about anything. My son locked himself in his room and Judy's daughter moped around the house, scowling at everyone. We felt like we ruined two lives."

Say hello to the adjustment phase:

During the adjustment phase of your second marriage, the following issues need to be addressed on an ongoing basis:

Different parenting styles. Couples often experience significant conflict when they do not agree on how to parent each other's children. It is imperative that you communicate with your partner about parental expectations and develop consistent rules for all the children. If you are inconsistent, the children will see this as a weakness and manipulate these parenting differences to their benefit. If you and your partner vehemently disagree about a particular parenting issue, consult with a child psychologist to get a more objective opinion.

The attention balancing act. Your second spouse wants your attention, your children want your attention, you want your spouse's attention, your spouse's children want your spouse's attention. There is a finite pool of attention to go around, so it is likely that someone is going to feel neglected at one time or another.

It is important that your children receive the time and attention they need. This will differ depending on their age and how well they are adjusting to the new living arrangements. It is also important that you and your partner set appropriate limits with the children and carve out time for your marriage. It is essential to the health of your relationship that you and your partner develop routines and activities that allow you each to nurture the marriage.

Acknowledge your own feelings of jealousy and resentment. It is normal for you to feel jealous of your spouse's relationship with his/her children--this is difficult to admit, but it's more common than you might think. You've remarried and feel lucky to have found love for a second (or third, or fourth...) time. You want your spouse all to yourself. It can feel like it's the children who stand in the way of the exclusivity that you desire. Rather than deny these feelings and feel silently resentful, understand them as natural, discuss them with your partner and they will lose their grip on you.

It ain't the Brady Bunch. The Brady Bunch made remarrying with children look easy. By the second episode all the kids were chummy and there was a quick (and unrealistic) acceptance of their step-parents. Sure, if all the kids get along this makes for instant family harmony. But this isn't a realistic expectation. Don't all full (non-Brady) siblings argue anyway? Don't force the relationship between your children and their new stepsiblings. Your children must accept the loss of their old family before they can accept their new one. This may take a long time, but it is well worth the patience and understanding you'll need to demonstrate to help your kids get there.

Don't forget to nurture your marriage. Children in blended families are often given a great deal of power by parents. This is due to parents feeling guilty about disrupting the lives of their children. In order to placate your guilt you may over-compensate by giving your son or daughter too much latitude and abandon the previous parent-child boundaries that were the rule in the past.

Without clear boundaries, children will continuously intrude into the private matters of your marriage. After all, they've already lost the only family they've known and may want to hold onto you for dear life. One way they might try to accomplish this will be to wedge themselves between you and your new spouse. Children should always feel loved by you, but they also need to learn that you will require time with your new spouse, a person you also love, albeit in a different way. The clearer the boundaries, the faster the children will settle into these new arrangements.

Blended families can work, but not without large doses of information, support, and patience. If you and your spouse work as a team (and feel like a team), you will be able to navigate the complexities that are involved in blending families.

Is your relationship worth protecting? Are you ready to make your marriage everything it can be?

Find out how to create the relationship of your dreams: Sign up for the free Relationship Toolbox Newsletter at http://StrengthenYourRelationship.com/ and immediately receive two FREE reports that will help you achieve your relationship potential.

About the Author

Richard Nicastro, Ph.D. is a psychologist and relationship coach who is passionate about helping couples protect the sanctuary of their relationship.

2007-10-03T02:22:00.001-07:00

Get Friends to Help Save Your Marriage by Pastor Clarence Chan

No matter how close two persons are, there can still be problems in the relationship. It is no different in marriage. No matter how strong the marriage relationship, there can still be friction between the marriage partners. This friction if left unaddressed or if addressed wrongly threatens to unravel the very fabric of the marriage. How can you save a marriage like this?

There are times when the couple cannot cope with the stress of an impending breakup. The arguments or fights between them seem to escalate. Attempts to reconcile always arrive at a stalemate. There seems to be no solution. In situations like these, friends play a major role in saving the marriage. If you know of a friend going through marital problems, you can do a lot to help because of your unique position of being close to the marriage but not in it. This gives you the ability to see things from a much more objective point of view. On the other hand, if you are the one in a troubled marriage, you have to consider some very important factors before asking a friend(s) to help you out.

The choice of friends is important. You are entrusting your marriage to them, revealing personal details and opening yourselves to them. Therefore, the friends must be mature, wise and trustworthy. They must be able to keep confidence. They must not have any hidden agenda other than to genuinely help save your marriage. Assuming you know of such friends, must they themselves be married also?

Being married would be preferable but not imperative. Obviously a married friend knows from experience what your problems are like. But there can be single friends (never married or once married) who can offer good advice, too depending on the nature of the problem in your marriage. In any case, the choice of who you ask to help must be mutually agreed upon by both partners. It is highly unadvisable to seek a friend's help without your partner's knowledge or consent. Here are some specific things friends can do for you.

The Role of Friends

These are things that you probably could not do yourself, but can be done for you by your friends:

1. They can give objective advice and insights into the problems. Although friends themselves may have a liking for one spouse more than the other, it is still possible to offer an objective viewpoint to any dispute

2. Friends can relieve you of some practical tasks to alleviate your stress in your marriage. In the midst of trying to solve the problems with your spouse, the children still need to go to school; the bills still need to be paid; the errands still needs to be run etc. While you are dealing with issues in your marriage, friends can help carry out these essential tasks.

3. Friends can provide a listening ear and moral support to encourage you to persevere. Your marriage is worth saving no matter what the cost. Having good friends alongside you helps tremendously. This is far better than soldiering on alone.

4. Friends can become your accountability partners where necessary. There are times when you or your spouse may need someone to be accountable to, especially in situations where a third party is involved. For example where there is an affair, friends can lovingly but firmly come between the erring spouse and the third party.

Conclusion

So it is advisable to seek the help of genuine, well-meaning friends to save your marriage. Do not think that you don't need someone else or wait until it's too late to get help. For your part, I have written a FREE report, "Practical Tips on Improving Your Marriage" that you can find in my website, http://www.savemarriagestoday.com. Do things to help yourself but also get the help of friends in saving your marriage where necessary.

About the Author

Clarence Chan is a minister, counselor, public speaker and internet marketer. Get TWO FREE bonuses, "Practical Tips on Improving Your Marriage" and "Above Life's Turmoil" from http://www.savemarriagestoday.com. Clarence has helped many people in the areas of family, marriage, internet marketing and self-development over the past 20 years. Visit http://www.savemarriagestoday.com

2007-10-03T02:21:00.001-07:00

How to keep your marriage alive by Mike Jones

How to keep your marriage alive

Does your daily routine consist of waking up in the early hours of the morning, to get ready for work, and then to get your children ready for school? And then after work you come home, cook for your partner and childrens dinner, then watch some TV before you pop off to bed. Well it doesn't have to be like this day in, day out.

Is the life you want to lead?

I'm guessing you don't want to live your life like this, put the romance back into your marriage today! First of all you need to communicate with your partner, for god sake how is your partner suppose to know how your feeling if you don't communicate with them. And I don't mean to talk to your partner if he is watching a football game, or if she is watching her soap operas. I mean proepr communication time, sit down alone with no distractions. Talk about how your feeling, talk about your ambitions, your dreams every single day! When listening to your partner, don't just nod and reply with one word answers, you have to be interested in what they got to say.

I love you, those three words mean a hell of a lot. You do not need to say it every hour of every day. What you do is say it just before you go to bed, of whenever you "feel" it. "I love you and appreciate everything you do for me and our children", wow, saying that goes a long way. How special is that, you can even spice it up every now and then, leave a little note by the side of your partners bed before you leave for work, or a simple email during the day etc.

And finally; surprise your partner every now and then. Buy a single red rose, which are really cheap or a bunch of flowers, these little gifts go along way. Or simply surprise your partner by saying "you look beautiful / handsome today" just out of now where.

About the Author

Mike Jones is a marriage counselor with over 20 years experience, he started off his career in marriage counseling after a bad patch in his marriage, but he managed to revive his marriage using tips from the internet. Click here for Mike Jones' free tips on marriage and divorce.

2007-09-30T04:03:00.001-07:00

Divorce Decrees Tarrant County, Arlington, Texas by Richard Dyer

Marriage Records Of Divorse California: S. Therefore, our first tip for anyone beginning to search for public marriage records on the internet is to be as specific as possible. This means you need to specify what type of marriage record you want, state, city, dates or years and first, middle and last names as they pertain to your marriage record's search. Even being that specific, you will still be given a large number of options to choose from. For instance, when we searched for "criminal marriage records Dallas Texas 2005 John Michael Smith" over 500,000 websites were identified. Obviously, many of these sites were not specifically geared towards public marriage records, but you get the picture that you need to be specific.. This is just scratching the surface the the amount of info you can find.

Marriage Records Database: These records are known as eyewitness accounts the earliest and most accurate record of someone's birth recognized for having been around since the early 1900s. You should make sure that the public records site that you log on to offers excellent value for your money: fast service comprehensive database and excellent customer support. See texas marriage liscense records To protect individuals from identify theft, U.S. Search does not provide social security numbers, date of birth, credit history, and employment marriage records, nor to they offer bank account information or other private financial information. If you are considering leaving a secure job to go to work for a small rather unknown company, having a look at public court marriage records can help you to know if it is a good idea. Public court marriage records can show you if the company has been sued and if so what the outcome of the lawsuit was. You can research whether the company has ever filed for bankruptcy or had tax issues. Public court marriage records can even give you information about the owners of the company. By using the information found in public court marriage records, you can learn about the companies past dealings and make a reasonable and informed decision about changing jobs..

Marriage Records List Some of these sites like the Oklahoma site provide information about criminal records free of charge. And in no event at a speed which endangers safety of a person or property. More at free phone number search thru public records For the latter previous court records may be used against someone involved in a current court case.

Marriage Records Database Additionally the GPO makes publications from three levels of government available for free public use in Federal depository libraries throughout the United States. Easy online access to public marriage records does solve the problem of having to visit several locations to get information. But this doesn't mean you'll get all the data you need. Online access to public marriage records doesn't address important problems such as knowing what public marriage records are available, knowing where to find them and being forced to retype search criteria on each and every site.. See http://www.publicrecordgov.cn/arrest-warrant/warrant-arrest-for-jose-antonio-nieves-in-elizabeth-nj.php For the latter previous court records may be used against someone involved in a current court case.

About the Author

Richard is an expert in public birth records illinois for over 20 years. More sources at http://www.usamarriagerecord.cn/public-court-records/jefferson-county-illinois-court-records.php

2007-09-29T06:35:00.001-07:00

Stop a Divorce Now with Marriage Counseling by Sarah Jackson

Are you wondering how you can stop a divorce now? Do you feel like you have tried everything? Have you found a good marriage counselor?

Marriage counselors don't have to be seen as merely a last-ditch attempt at saving a troubled marriage. Most of the time however, that is exactly what they become. This is truly unfortunate, because marriage counselors can be a lot more effective earlier in the marriage. It's often the case that by the time the married couple decides to seek professional help, they have so much resentment built up to such a high level that their issues are much more difficult to resolve if not impossible.

A lot of the time, married couples will cringe at the idea of marriage counseling because they feel that it's an admission of failure. This is a deeply ingrained socio-cultural value that is also an extremely pointless one. In order for a couple to be able to admit that a marriage has problems becomes paramount to declaring the marriage a potential success later on. This is not only sad but foolish.

For many marriages that end in divorce, it may have been saved if for no other reason but basic marital counseling. Since most of the couples that end in divorce have never tried marriage counseling, they will never know the answer for sure. It will always be a question in their minds which leads to many what ifs.

Advice about Marriage Counselors

In my opinion, the most helpful and perhaps the healthiest way for people to look at marriage counseling is to consider it routine maintenance and not a last ditch effort to save a lost cause. Just as the smarter car owner takes the car in for regular inspections and oil changes, the same goes for the smarter couples who know that it would be best to make marriage counseling part of their official marriage routine. It is best to consider it a forum that you can use to share your ideas and opinions in a safe and neutral setting. When it is moderated by a professional: the marriage counselor becomes safe for both partners. In situations like this, all of your minor problems can be dealt with early on and defused before they become bigger and perhaps insurmountable.

I have a number of friends who worked with marriage counselors with varying degrees of success. One rule that you can keep in mind is that you need to have a mutual agreement about the counselor. In other words, if one of the partners in the marriage feels like the counselor is always on the other person's side, then that's going to cause some serious problems later on. You should always choose a counselor who is neutral and able to see both sides objectively. This is what makes marriage counseling work.

So if you are truely looking to stop a divorce now, my advice to you is to think about a marriage counselor. You can find a counselor at your church or in the yellow pages.

Click Here! to get more advice on how to stop a divorce now.

About the Author

Sarah learned how to stop her divorce. Click here to find out how she did. Click Here!

2007-09-27T01:42:00.001-07:00

7 Secrets To A Happy Marriage by Leslie Gerard

A marriage is a formal union that combines two lives as one, but it takes a certain amount of work to make any union last forever. This article is designed to reveal seven secrets that every couple should know.

Communicate. When you stop communicating with your spouse, you're in trouble. It's important to be able to talk to one another about anything, including the good and bad points of a day. A successful marriage is one where happiness is celebrated and sadness is shared.

Make a date. Many couples find it difficult to spend quality time with one another on a regular basis. Whether it's work commitments or just a hectic day, it often seems as though scheduling time together is the only way to make it happen. So, rather than checking your appointment calendar, simply set aside one day a week for a 'date night.' Both you and your spouse will ideally not schedule anything else during this time and will just make it a special evening for the two of you. Whether it's a trip to the movie theater, dining at a fine restaurant or just curling up on the sofa, making a date with your spouse is always fun.

Be honest. In any relationship, especially a marriage, honesty is important. One deceit, regardless of how small, can quickly turn into another and the endless cycle begins. The best way to handle any situation is to be honest with your mate. If in doubt, ask yourself how you would want to be treated if the situation was reversed. If you prefer honesty yourself, show the same courtesy to your spouse.

Discuss financial issues. Money is one of the leading reasons why most couples argue. Not only that, it's also a leading cause for divorce. Whether you have it or you don't, money can be a touchy subject. The best way to handle financial issues is to discuss them openly.

Express your anger immediately. Otherwise, it may build and gradually become worse over time. Whether you need to shout or cry, it's important that your spouse knows what's on your mind. Your mate cannot possibly rectify the situation if he/she is not even aware that one exists.

Laugh. Every successful relationship has laughter. If you've ever heard the old saying that "laughter is the best medicine," it's true. There's no better way to treat your relationship than with a few chuckles now and then.

Remember why you love your spouse. Even when things are rough, remember all of the reasons that you fell in love with your mate. Was it a smile, their loving heart, sensitivity, eyes or just an unexplainable feeling when he/she is near? Whatever it was, remember it always. Even when you do not like your spouse, keep in mind that you do love them.

The information contained in this article is designed to be used for reference purposes only. It should not be used as, in place of or in conjunction with professional relationship and/or marital advice. For additional information or to address specific relationship issues, consult a marriage counselor.

About the Author

Recently married and working in the wedding favors industry for the past several years, Leslie is moving into kids furniture and hopes to be a proud parent soon!

2007-09-25T01:19:00.001-07:00

Marriage is a Balancing Act by kristine

"Marriage is not a ritual or an end. It is a long , intricate, intimate dance together and nothing matters more than your own sense of balance and your choice of partner." ---- Amy Bloom

Norman and Samantha are celebrating their 9th wedding anniversary. The past nine years cannot be called married bliss even if they were madly in love with each other. Like any other couples, they have had their share of conflicts and trials. But Norman and Samantha's main problem is that they are extreme opposites. Samantha likes the finer things in life while Norman is like the cowboy who likes to get his hands dirty and enjoys the simple pleasure of the outdoors and sports. There are things that get into each other's nerves and they both end up in a shouting match. This pattern of behavior had resulted in stress and anxiety. Many have told them to work on their communication skills if they want their marriage to remain intact.

Like Norman and Samantha, thousands of couples struggle with communication. The way we communicate plays a big part in marriage. It defines how we relate to our spouses and to our children. Poor communication can actually lead a marriage to utter failure.

Long-lasting marriages are usually characterized by open, encouraging, and positive communication between the man and woman. Learning how to properly identify issues that must be resolved is also a communication skill that no married person can afford not to have.

There are a number of ways to communicate with your spouse. Why not improve on your commuincation style by reading the following methods or types of communication:

Types of Communication:

· The Discussion Type- Having a discussion gives you time to see each other's point of view a lot better. You must learn how to talk and listen attentively, clarify issues, and acknowledge each other's thoughts and feelings.

· The Confrontational Type - As the worst type of communication, if it can be called communication at all, is confrontational. This usually involves shouting matches in the heat of an argument.

· The Non-Confrontational - You simply do nothing, ignore your misunderstandings, and prefer to be silent about an issue in your marriange. It is a type of "non-communication" that does not lead to the resolution of a problem.

Types of Conflict Resolution

Couples should also try to learn and practice conflict resolution techniques. Marriage cannot survive if problems are not discussed and resolved completely. It is important for couples to know about the ways people approach a conflict. These approaches are as follows:

1. The Avoidant Type - This type avoids all hot issues or topics and actually cause a problem to get worse. Couples who avoid conflict usually value each other's private space and tend to live in a placid manner without the intense passion. However, the way they avoid discussing issues can sometimes complicate their problems.

2. The Validating Type - This entails affirming one another's feelings, considering all points of view, and coming to an amicable settlement. Couples who maintain this type of communication see each other as friends and value the collaborative nature of their relationship rather than their selfish aspirations.

3. The Volatile Type- When couples don't listen to each other's point of view but try to convince each other that he or she is right have the perfect ingredient for divorce or separation. When couples see each other as equals and respect each other's individuality and independence, they are able to discuss constructively without resorting to heated arguments and "volatile" actions.

Tips for a Successful Partnership

It is important for couples to know that the success of their marriage depends a lot on good communication and the ability to talk constructively as partners. These tips are simple yet can do a lot to make a marriage last:

· Being affectionate · Showing your concern or how much you care · Being thoughtful by giving gifts even when there is no occasion · Being appreciative · Having a healthy sense of humor · Sharing each other's joy

To keep marriage strong, couples must share their interests and explore new things together. They must also learn to accept each other's weaknesses and perspectives even if they do not agree. Indeed, marriage is a matter of give-and-take. Whether it's having an argument or making a marriage work, it does take " two to tango."

About the Author

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2007-09-22T20:13:00.001-07:00

Marriage: From Rocky Road to Rock Solid by Garold N. Larson

No marriage is perfect. Even the best of marriages experience problems from time to time. Just because you have problems in your marriage doesn't mean you have a bad marriage or that you should end your relationship. A marriage is a work in progress which requires patience and love.

Marriage was ordained of God

We read in the Bible in Genesis 2:24 - "Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh."

From the beginning marriage has been ordained of God. It is a divine institution. It is sacred and should be treated as such. Have you ever stopped and thought about the fact that, in God's eyes, marriage isn't just a legal transaction like buying a car or a house - it is a sacred rite, like baptism or confirmation. When we mess with marriage we are treading on sacred ground.

Worldly concepts that affect marriage:

Sad to say but there are few today who view marriage as sacred. I'm afraid the world we live in has contributed to the cheapening of marriage. Consider the following:

1. It's a disposable world - we have disposable razors and diapers. You don't even fix VCRs or DVD players anymore; you just throw them away and buy new ones. Marriage is looked upon in the same way.

2. It's a quick fix world - you can fix your eyes in a day with laser surgery. You can whiten your teeth and get an instant tan in the same day. We are an impatient world and when something isn't working we want it fixed right now. If we can't fix our marriage right away then we want out.

3. It's a "new morality" world - Chastity and virtue and faithfulness to your spouse are scoffed and scored. But when you examine this "new morality" closer you'll find it's just the "old immorality."

Marriage: A frightening adventure!

Marrying someone is a scary thing. You hope you choose the right person. You think you know them but you don't. Not really! When my wife Lisa and I were dating we were so in love. We couldn't stand to be apart from each other. Neither of us could do any wrong. Then we got married. You wake up the next day to a stranger! Who is this person? Our first time shopping together and we get into a fight about cheese!

Our first big fight

One time just after we were married we were at a friend's house and I happened to say something that really embarrassed Lisa. Well, the drive home that night was not good. Boy did I get it up one side and down the other. When we pulled into the parking lot to our apartment building Lisa just got out of the car and started walking to the apartment without me. Obviously she didn't want me with her. So I just started up the car and took off. I was going to show her!

I was mad. I drove aimlessly through the city trying to sort out my feelings. I needed to go somewhere to think but nothing was open that late at night. So I drove out to the airport. This was before the days of high security. I began walking around the airport trying to figure things out and blow off some steam. I was practically the only person in the whole place.

For some reason I looked at my hand. I looked again in disbelief! My wedding ring was gone. "Oh, great!" I thought. "I've lost my wedding ring and Lisa's going to think I threw it in the river or something! I've got to find it."

I began searching the airport, retracing all my steps. It was nowhere to be found. I searched my car. I drove around aimlessly knowing I couldn't go back to Lisa without my wedding ring.

Several hours went by. I parked the car and just sat there. What was I going to do? Then a thought came to me. "Perhaps I lost it at work today." At that time I worked in a small cabinet shop. I just happened to have the key to the shop with me. By now it was about two in the morning. I drove to the cabinet shop and walked up to the door. I had been running several machines that day. Each of these machines were attached to big dust collectors, like giant vacuums, that sucked all the sawdust into a huge dumpster just outside the shop. I looked at that dumpster and my heart sank. If my ring got sucked up in there it would take days for me to find it.

I unlocked the shop and went inside. I looked at each of the machines I had used that day. There, sitting on one of the machines was a pair of gloves I had worn when I ran that machine. I picked up the left glove and put my hand inside. There was my ring! Oh I was so happy.

I jumped into the car and drove back to the apartment. I climbed the three flights of stairs to the floor where we lived. As I came closer to the door I could hear loud sobbing coming from inside the apartment.

"Oh Gary, please come home! Pleeeeaaaaase come home Gary!"

Oh, my poor, dear, sweet wife. What have I done? I opened the door and said "I'm home! I'm home!" I fully expected her to throw her arms around me and shower me with hugs and kisses. Oh no. This was not to be! Lisa took one look at me and screamed, "Don't you ever do that again! You dirty rotten excuse for a human being! How dare you leave me?"

And THAT was the beginning of our sacred marriage. It took a lot of compromise and give-and-take. We've gone through our good times and bad times. We've had six wonderful children and twenty six years of living and growing together to get to the point now where we can't live without each other. We're best friends now, where we finish each other's sentences, and where we have more affection and love and attraction to each other than on our wedding day. We're not perfect. We still have our struggles - but we're in it for the long haul because we love each other and because God is our partner in marriage. And THAT makes it sacred. Just remember that it didn't get that way over night!

Thank you.

About the Author

Garold N. Larson writes on personal development topics. You can find more information at Keys to Personal Development

2007-09-20T02:46:00.000-07:00

Deconstructing The Marriage Debate

By: MIKE SELVON

The current marriage debate involving homosexual marriage can be very confusing. The reality is that this particular marriage debate has been around for quite some time. The current form of the debate is that the notion of traditional marriage is under attack from the acceptance of the homosexual lifestyle through marriage in terms of mainstream society.

One fact that is constantly presented by the conservative side is that marriage is on the decline and more people are getting divorces. They claim that this is a direct result of global moral decay. While one in two couples in the United States get a divorce, the rate is different in the rest of the world.

Stats from Germany, for example, have the divorce rate sitting at about two or three hundred couples out of every thousand. Canada's divorce stats are slightly higher than that, while Italy's statistics tend to be the lowest in the European Union at around fifty couples out of every thousand.

The divorce arguments factor in to what conservatives in North America consider to be moral decay. The conservatives use this argument to explain why homosexual marriage and abortion are "on the rise". The United States conservatives have elected to blame those two social issues for the perceived social decline in marriage values without actually looking for causes.

Relationships between parents and children are, for example, often centralized because of parents splitting up or because of a lack of role models from both genders. Conservatives often use statistics in terms of child relationships when it comes to homosexual marriage.

The comprehensive data at this point determines that gender has very little to do with raising children. The marriage sex or gender of these role models is entirely secondary to simply having role models. This is because of the actual decay of society that is related to living in a world where both parents need to work in order to support a family. In these instances, having both parents with the child are extremely rare.

While conservatives attempt to push the marriage debate and their view on various social issues, it is actually a social-economic climate issue that is largely to blame for the breakdown of the American family. As both parents in a home need to work to support children, the time that the child has with those parents is significantly diminished.

The time that the couple has for one another is equally diminished. This leads to various workplace affairs and other social issues that are in direct response to marriage breakdowns. Marriage licenses are still actively being rejected to otherwise loving people that just happen to be the same gender, while in other places marriage licenses are granted to those that will work fifty hours a week and will barely form a family unit.

In light of all of the misinformation, it is important to realize that there are still standards of marriage to uphold. Those standards, however, are not those currently present due to the political leanings in the marriage debate. Those standards are in place in people's lives and that is truly the only marriage debate that matters.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:

Mike Selvon owns a number of niche portal. Please visit our marriage portal for more great tips on marriage debate. While you are there don't forget to claim your free gift.

Article Source: http://www.article-directorysite.com

2007-09-19T02:10:00.003-07:00

Stuck in a Sexless Marriage? Discover the Shocking Formula That an Predict a Divorce 1 Year in Advance by Larry Bilotta

Many men and women who find themselves in a sexless marriage are caught off guard when their spouse tells them they want a divorce. They just didn't see it coming. They could not see the warning signs and in fact, they had no real interest in looking for them...until now.

Then there are those spouses who are not daring enough to go the route of divorce, but instead find solace and comfort in the arms of another man or woman. These affairs often carry on as "secret lives" hidden behind the masquerade of a happy family to outsiders.

I often refer to these couples as "Wake Me When It's Over" spouses because those involved in affairs find it far too painful to think of all the "what ifs" involved in this complicated situation.

Finally, the last group of spouses are those who argue, then make up, argue, then make up again until they're both worn down to the point of apathy.

Marriage troubles can be predicted when you understand the shocking formula that can forecast your divorce, even a year in advance, regardless of which of the three phases you might fall into.

The ability to do this requires that you have my free "HOT and NOT" marriage drawings which you can download at my "Stop your divorce" website: http://www.youcansavethismarriage.com/hotnot.pdf

Just because they are drawings, does not mean they should be taken lightly. They allow you to take a measurable look at your marriage and predict a divorce in advance.

Since this is a 50% divorce rate culture, you can use this prediction tool to serve as a wake up call so you can avoid becoming just another statistic. The first phase couples experience is the romance stage of the relationship. If you've downloaded the drawing, you'll see that I'm referring to the "HOT drawing".

In these four levels, you can see exactly what draws a man to a woman and how much work, time and effort she puts into attracting her target man. Not to be outdone, you'll see that the man in question is also putting 100% of his effort into attracting the woman.

As you look at these two scenarios setting the stage to "become serious", you'll likely get a warm feeling inside. It's a kind of "happily ever after" thing. All of us want to see people find love and happiness just like in the movies. We all want it for ourselves as well.

But this drawing is meant for more than giving us blissful feelings. What it contains is actually the formula to become happy and fulfilled for a lifetime in marriage.

On the left side of the picture is what a man needs to know in order to ensure that the woman he marries continues to love him. On the right side of this image is what a woman needs to do in order to keep her man loyal and faithful.

You'll see that women want their men to be a responsible wage earner, maintain a presentable appearance, protect her from hostile threats in any form and continue to sacrifice his time, energy and money on her behalf. You would think this would be a snap since he did this at the very beginning of the relationship, but over time couples end the courtship and fall back into their old behaviors to the point where they resent each other which eventually leads to a sexless marriage.

Now men on the other hand want their women to maintain their appearance as well. A man wants his wife to make him feel important no matter what he does or doesn't do. He wants his wife to tell him about all the things he does well and accept him as he is - quirks and all.

So there you have it. Want a great marriage and a great life?

Follow this plan and don't deviate from it. This is what makes men and women "Hot" for each other.

It's so simple, yet so commonly overlooked by couples. But most couples don't stay "Hot" for each other long. Instead what they do is go the "easy route" (though it is not easy at all!) and do what one-million, five hundred thousand couples do every year - get a divorce.

This brings us to the second drawing in the illustration which shows the destructive ways that couples tear their marriage apart...without even knowing it!

So what are they doing so wrong?

Simple. They just do the OPPOSITE of what they did to create it. In the drawing, pictures 1, 2, 3, and 4 of second drawing is what predicts a divorce.

Now the question is; how can you predict when divorce will happen in your marriage? A sexless marriage is a pretty good indicator of some serious problems in your marriage, but there's another easy answer.

Take these pictures to the person you married and ask them to put a score of 10 down to 1 on the pictures. If you're a man, take both pictures to your wife and say "Honey, I need you to give me a score based on these pictures with 10 being, "This is exactly what's happening" and 1 being "This is not happening at all".

If you're well on your way to a divorce, you might find that when you give her the "HOT page", she rates you with 2's and 3's. If this is the case, you'll most likely find that on the "NOT page", she rates you with 9's and 10's. If this is the case, consider this a wake up call that you need to do something RIGHT NOW about your sexless marriage before it's too late.

If your wife did in fact give you these scores, you could safely predict that a divorce is in your future as close to a month or as far as even 12 months away if you do absolutely nothing different from what you're doing now.

What I just laid out for men in the scoring process, applies equally for women as well. If you take these drawings to your husband and find high scores on the "Not page" and low scores on the "Hot page", you know you're in trouble.

Does this really work?

The reason this works so well is because these simple pictures eliminate any need to talk about your problems, the history, what went wrong and who did what to whom. Putting all that aside, simply ask your spouse for scores.

And when you do, be sure NOT to sit in the same room and wait. Let them do it privately. For most couples, this little scoring exercise comes as a real rude awakening.

It forces you to stop living with the wool pulled over your eyes and starts communication between the two of you. Without communication, the two of you go on as normal and over time you begin to just feel indifferent about each other and your marriage.

Now here are some quick tips to help you with this exercise...

Tip #1: If you have received low scores, don't react in a negative way. Make sure you act like a student who has been given low grades halfway through the semester. Now is the time to meet with your "teacher" and find out how to correct the problem.

Tip #2: With this "good student" analogy in mind, it is your job to find out how to turn around a potentially bad "semester", by asking your spouse specific questions...starting with the "HOT picture".

Here's an example of a specific question you could ask your spouse. "Honey, tell me how I showed you I was a responsible wage earner and good with money when we were first dating."

Another example. "Honey, how do you think I took care of my appearance when we were dating and you were so interested in me?" And, "Honey, how well did I make you feel that I would protect you and stand up for you to make you feel safe when we were dating?" If you want help with the last question, "Honey, in what ways did I sacrifice my time, energy and money for you when we were dating?"

Tip #3: The answers you get will give you an idea of what you did well at one time. With this positive illustration still ringing in your ears, ask about the "NOT picture", but this time, don't ask specific questions about those negative behaviors. Instead, ask about how you can do specific things to get back to the "HOT picture".

Here's another tip: Dwelling on problems will only create more problems in your marriage. This is one of the reasons why marriage counseling has such dismal success rates - they focus on the problems.

Instead, focus on the way you were. The more you talk about those "HOT pictures", the more fulfilling your marriage will become.

Tip #4: Each of you should take your turn at this exercise. If your sexless marriage is on the verge of divorce and the "NOT picture" is an exact depiction of your marriage, consider having a neutral person take the two of you through this exercise.

Tip #5: Once you've got your "HOT scores" and the solutions, or answers from your spouse on how to get back to that positive point in your marriage, plan a date and do something as close to what you used to do when you were truly happy with each other.

If you want to go the extra mile, buy the book "10 Great Dates" on Amazon.com. Each date teaches you something about how rekindle the romance in your marriage. The book gets into lots of helpful specifics that will teach you far more than you presently know about how to be married. Do this right and and you'll soon be looking back at your sexless marriage as a thing of the past as your resentment towards each other is replaced with those "warm and fuzzy feelings" back from when you were dating.

About the Author

Watch the videos at Larry Bilotta's Stop Your Divorce website to discover how he saved his marriage and how you can avoid the effects of divorce transform your sexless marriage into the marriage you've always hoped for.

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2007-09-17T19:40:00.001-07:00

Confronting Marriage Issues During Relationship Struggles

By: MIKE SELVON

All marriages have difficulties and marriage issues because life has difficulties and issues. The impact those difficulties have depends on the impact that the couple allows them to have. Some couples will fight and claw one another's eyes out, others will ignore the issue and bury it, and still others will seek out professional help with various aspects of their marriage. Regardless of the choice of getting through marriage issues, they will always occur.

Many people fight it out when they have conflicts or marriage issues. For some couples, the best possible option is to yell and scream at the top of their lungs until the problem has been "shouted out". This can be therapeutic if standards and boundaries are set.

If a conflict becomes physical, however, it will quickly turn dangerous for both parties and can serve as a "deal breaker" for the entire relationship. Physical conflict is something that should never occur under any circumstances. Divorce marriage is certainly an aspect to consider if physical conflicts begin to take place. Divorce marriage will quickly remove the participants from the situation and possibly save lives.

In other cases, couples choose to ignore the marriage issues and bury them. This generally unhealthy approach can lead to problems down the road, escalating the original conflict. One thing piles up on top of another and, before the participants are even aware of what is happening, there is an explosion of catastrophic impact.

For some reason, people seem to want to test the bonds of their relationships by keeping conflicts and issues hidden. Burying concerns in a marriage will certainly test the bonds, but they will inevitably bring about a breaking point as they grow and boil to the surface. Instead, they should be approached as they occur and a discussion should take place.

Other people will seek out marriage counseling help for their marriage issues. This is viewed differently by many couples. Some will view counseling as a last resort, while others will view it as a first call.

The idea behind marriage counseling is that a third party will hear the problems of the couple and be able to offer qualified objective advice. Many people put a high value on this type of help, but others find it to be redundant because the counselor does not "know" the couple.

Regardless of the type of conflict resolution used to help with marriage issues, they will rear their ugly head during the course of a marriage. There are many books and other materials that are designed to help couples with conflict resolution skills. Some may turn to therapy, while others ignore the issue. Still others shout the issue out until it is apparently drained from their systems.

The reality about issues in marriage is that they will occur, but the true challenge comes in the overcoming of these issues. If a couple is strong and open, the ability to conquer marriage issues will be present. If they hide issues, however, the ability to overcome the marriage issues may be weakened.

Over time, marriage issues will begin to represent the various ups and downs that all married people experience throughout their lives.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:

Mike Selvon owns a number of niche portal. Please visit our marriage portal for more great tips on marriage issues. While you are there don't forget to claim your free gift.

Article Source: http://www.article-directorysite.com

2007-09-16T02:20:00.001-07:00

Save Your Marriage : Prevent Burnout to Save Your Marriage by Clarence Chan

What is marriage burnout and is it a natural evolution of marriage after some time? You may be thinking to yourself that all marriages tone down over time, the sizzle and passion gradually decreases after the honeymoon and the emotional highs slowly diminish as the couple comes back to the real world. That's absolutely true. It is humanly impossible to feel an emotional adrenalin rush for your partner 24/7/365, year after year after the wedding.

So if marriages naturally tone down and feelings of passion reduce by themselves in the normal course of life for a couple, then what does marriage burnout mean? And how can you tell the difference between burnout and normal tone down? Good questions. Allow me to explain the crucial differences.

The Vital Differences

Marriage tone down is where your feelings towards your partner are not negative. You may not feel passion or intense desire for him or her, but there are no hard feelings such as resentment, jealousy, bitterness, unresolved conflicts or anger towards your partner. Many people keep negative feelings inside them towards their partners because of some bad experiences or arguments they have had in the past. This is one clear symptom of marriage burnout. And it is what makes marriage burnout different from marriage tone down.

Marriage tone down is where you and your partner are still best friends even though the emotional highs have long past. Living together may be hum drum and banal, but you are still each other's best friend. On the other hand, marriage burnout is where your relationship with another person or persons is closer than with your own partner. Personal secrets are shared with that other person. You do more things and spend more time with that other person than with your partner. You tend to think of that other person more than your partner and may even fantasize about being married to him or her. You do favors for the other person that you don't do or have stopped doing for your partner. In short, someone else other than your partner is your best and most intimate friend. That is marriage burnout.

Marriage tone down is having the attitude (not just feeling) of love towards your partner. Love is both an attitude and a feeling. The feeling of love ebbs and flows because it is an emotion and emotions may be capricious at times. But the attitude of love does not change so long as you determine to adopt that attitude. Attitude is within your control. Feelings are not. Thus a long-married couple may not feel love for each other as often as before but their attitude towards one another is most certainly that of love. In fact this attitude of love grows stronger over the years.

But in marriage burnout, you experience a stronger feeling of love for another person than for your partner. This then leads to adopting an attitude of love for the other person the way you would for your partner. And since your love for the other person is both feeling and attitude driven, whereas your love for your spouse is mainly attitudinal only, it constitutes marriage burnout.

How to Prevent Marriage Burnout

Now that you know what marriage burnout is, let's consider several ways to prevent it. Firstly, guard your heart from being drawn to another person other than your partner. Remember, love is an attitude besides a feeling. You can control who you love. Do not love anyone the way you love your partner.

Secondly, make time to be alone with your partner regularly. Once a week or once a fortnight, have someone mind the children while you spend quality time together as husband and wife. It is during these times that significant things can take place. Conflicts can be resolved, differences ironed out, misunderstandings clarified, you can laugh together, have fun together, share intimate things with each other and simply enjoy one other's company.

Thirdly, try to do things together as much as possible. Having common interests is important. If you and your partner enjoy a similar activity, do it together often. Also, work on projects or work-related matters together if possible. Become members of the same church, social organization or volunteer group and be part of the same activities together. This serves to accomplish two things. It is a welcome break to the normal routine of life where the two of you can get involved in something different other than household tasks. And it is an opportunity to accomplish something meaningful together. This brings a sense of bonding and personal satisfaction between the two of you.

Putting these simple steps into practice goes a long way towards preventing or arresting marriage burnout. This in turn will save your marriage.

About the Author

Clarence Chan is a minister, counselor and trainer. A husband and father of five children, Clarence has been helping couples improve their marriages for over 20 years. He has spoken and written extensively on marriage issues especially on saving troubled marriages. Today, Clarence continues to give marriage counsel to couples both personally and through his writings, websites and blogs. Visit http://www.savemarriagestoday.com